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Petty Little Things

Submitted by DaBeast at 2019-04-02 01:57:27 EDT
Rating: 0.66 on 3 ratings (8 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

You wage your little battles, flinging words like weapons and it's funny to watch when someone, unthinkingly, grabs a boomerang because it's see if I can grab the popcorn before it comes back and bites them in the ass time. No, I'm not hyphenating all that shit.

What really matters in your world? I wonder that, sometimes, about random people I encounter. The answers are rarely surprising.

You're into sex. Doesn't matter what kind, doesn't matter whom with, it's the act that gets you going. Me, I don't get it. Boil it down and it's never anything more than Tab A into Slot B and you can add outfits and props and bring your freaky friends along to play, film it, hide it, do it on the hood of a cop car - it's all Tab A, Slot B. I've had all the sex and after a millennium plus watching you hairless apes get it wrong, the thing pales, the lust dies, and that's when you know there's naught but dust in your veins and you really don't give a fuck.

And you, over there. Yeah, you're the little freak that's into darker things, more forbidden things, the slimy things that you find in the out of sight places where the norms don't go. Yours is a feeling just as primal, just as necessary, and that anger broiling your bones can't be appeased easily or often but when it is, oh, it feels nice down in the dirty little cockles of your soul. Yeah, I've met a thousand or more just like you. It will never be enough for you, any suffering you inflict. You will always need more, just one more fix, and then I'll stop. Such fiction. But that brings me to...

Don't start strutting yet, junkie. Be it caffeine, nicotine, alcohol, adrenaline, or any of a thousand other poisons, you just gotta have it. Can't function without it, can't be sane or right or good without it and it makes the pain, the stress, the hurt bearable. Everybody's got their way to get through the day and I don't judge. Some of the best souls in Hell were junkies. Remind me to tell you about the joys of spinning a needle just out of Belushi's reach sometime. Funny story. 1,000 pound bumblebee in part of it. You'd like it.

Any saints out there?

No, I knew there weren't. This place isn't quite that sanctimonious just yet.

You are, all of you, so... innocent and this place plays much like redneck soap opera, which while it can be a fascinating watch it's because it shares much in common with train wrecks and natural disasters.

This is a glorious conflux of absolute batshitery and bullshit and you all revel in it, so, and you walk through the door and you throw off your clothes and you strut past us all and we still come back from time to time to drink it in and mock it as is its just due.

If we didn't, how would you know that we hated you? I mean, some things demand to be shared.

And, yet, for all the vitriol, you come back and huddle together, like children around a lone candle burning in the dark, the last remnant of something gone and forgotten by all but a very few, a piece of the past that still, sometimes, has a heartbeat.

Fuck every last one of you for being sentimental old fools.

Bring me your negative scores, my pretties!



Review This Item




Submitted by vee vaa at 2019-06-13 22:08:13 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by asmasta808 at 2019-06-02 15:20:49 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

ok, fashionistan.

Submitted by X54 at 2019-04-24 18:30:55 EDT (#)

The hyphen key takes no more effort than the space bar. Ring finger on your right hand: extend it up two rows.

Submitted by Tormentos at 2019-04-03 17:19:19 EDT (#)

I'm with Jeanneee on that. Bud doesn't reduce depression, but it can increase depression if you're already depressed. Alcohol, same same. As lame as it sounds, going outside and using your body seems to work very reliably for mild depression. Walk or jog around the block, climb a hill, ride a bike. Anything that causes your body chemistry to change internally as a response to the exercise rather than from external inputs like drugs. Give it a shot if you haven't already. What's the worst that can happen? You'll burn off a few calories, feel hungry, and walk over to that place around the corner that has that great pizza.

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2019-04-03 17:04:57 EDT (#)

Submitted by Murphy1844 at 2019-04-03 16:33:50 EDT (#)

What really matters to me right now is trying different strands of bud so that I can pull myself out of this depressive slump. I'll write about that, and see if anyone is interested.

I'm interested to know if you find a strain that helps you out. (I hope you do, for whatever that's worth.)

I quit smoking weed about a year ago and discovered that my depression symptoms improved. The few times I have smoked since then have always ended up with me getting intrusive catastrophic thoughts and then regretting it. Sucks, because I'm not really into alcohol, and sometimes sobriety just isn't the vibe I'm feeling.

Submitted by Murphy1844 at 2019-04-03 16:33:50 EDT (#)

What really matters to me right now is trying different strands of bud so that I can pull myself out of this depressive slump. I'll write about that, and see if anyone is interested.

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2019-04-02 17:16:18 EDT (#)

I like the cut of your jib

Submitted by Bestmate2 at 2019-04-02 16:10:43 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Well I never.
Da Beast at his most splendid. Pouring forth scorn and vitriol from which even Beelzebub could not hide a blush.
I liked it. I even recognised a whisper and a pointed finger.
So, for once DB, and in all fraternity I say, yes, fuck ‘em all, fuck you all and fuck us all.
Merry are the gentlefolk as fooked as they be!

He gets it from your side of the family, you know. No monsters on my

-- Homer Simpson
Treehouse of Horror II