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JackedUpJesus

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-05-20 01:01:23 EDT
Rating: 1.68 on 21 ratings (45 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

The Chief of Police in Shamrock Texas was decent to me when I found him. He looked at me and my truck carefully, sizing up what kind of a person I might be. I think he wanted to see if he wanted me in his town. He smiled and gave me detailed directions to the rodeo grounds and handed me his card. He told me to call if I needed him. I had two pony fillies in the horse trailer this time and a woman with horses is treated well in Texas, even if she drives an old Jeep with California plates. I was tired, been on the road for what felt like forever. I have found that if you need to camp and not be hassled, the best thing to do is ask for permission.

I was pleased when the Chief said he would send his men to the rodeo grounds during the night just to make sure I was OK. He looked in my eyes and said "Can you take care of yourself?". I replied "Yes Sir, I sure can". He was asking in a polite way if I could defend myself. The rodeo grounds were way the hell out in the sticks and there was no cell signal or land line out there. All the better, when I travel I like a quiet camp.

I stopped for food on the way to camp at the deserted arena, there was a guy just hanging around the parking lot. He approached and said he loved horses and he tried to look at them in the trailer but I was already driving away. I don't suffer fools gracefully, especially when I am on the road. I also never allow anyone in my truck. I travel solo. I did allow a strange woman in my vehicle once, and it was not a pleasant experience.

Next morning I took a bath in a horse trough full of cold clean water and loaded up my horses. They had spent the night grazing and stretching their legs. The arena was constructed of fine pipe, and there was grass growing. I headed back to town to gas up and get coffee for me and a McMuffin for Tweeter my road dog.

There he was at McDonalds early in the morning. He seemed to be waiting for me, probably because of the California plates on my truck. I pulled in and parked. Watched him a while. He had a big dog that looked like it had walked 5000 miles, limping with the pads worn off his feet. Dusty backpack that looked heavy (full of hammers and hatchets), tent and guitar strapped to it. He had the crafty wild look of a person who has been on the streets forever, but he also had a smile that had old folks stopping to pet his dog, and maybe bring a few burgers out for him as they left. I passed him off 5 bucks as I walked in the door to get coffee, "Here's breakfast for the dog, feed him first". The guy looked kinda stunned in a "Slap Me Shirley my mojo ain't workin" kinda way. It seemed to me that he expected people to be impressed with him.

He had been eyeballing my truck, and when I came out of the diner he said "I sure could use a ride back to Cali". I said "Yeah your dog looks like he is tired of walking". The guy started following behind me giving me his spiel. I told him I was gonna gas up and I would think about his request to ride back to Cali with me. Dude did not look all that dangerous, except for the backpack full O HATCHETS & HAMMERS.

I could see him and the dog down the road as I put gas in the truck and the idea of having a stinky Jesus hitcher along for hundreds of miles did not appeal to me. The dog however was another smoke. I have a soft spot in my heart for strays. Stray people and stray dogs, even the stray cat or two. I figure if they have just a little help, maybe they can get themselves together.

I did what a sensible person should do when tempted to do the dangerous and ridiculous. I called my best friend. BarbWire asked where I was along my journey West, and I told her I was in Shamrock Texas and there was a man that looked like Jesus on acid asking for a ride. She started raising hell with me on the phone, just like I knew she would. She said he was a grown man and he could find his own damn way back to the West Coast and that he could be a serial killer. She told me that I would end up in a ditch and he would end up with my truck. She made me promise to put the pedal to the metal and head out on the highway pronto. I told her I was just checking in to let her know where I was, and of course I wasn't hauling a drifter around in my truck.

I felt bad about the dog, a hard wind was whipping and it had started raining. There aren't many things sorrier in the world than a cold wet homeless dog. The thought hit me that maybe I should tell him that he and the dog could ride in the trailer with the horses, but I had promised BarbWire, and I am a woman of my word. I have meandered around roadtripping long enough to know better than to associate with drifters. I often hand street folk a few dollars in passing, but I keep on stepping and don't engage in much conversation with them.

I passed by where he was waiting with a hopeful look on his face, I didn't wave as I went. There was an ugly change in his demeanor and his eyes flashed dark and he seemed somehow older and bigger and half mean around the edges. If looks could kill my heart would have stopped on the spot.

Yesterday on the news I saw the Jesus man again. I saw a face on the telly and I knew him from someplace. Well, where was it? HITCHHIKER! It was the same hitcher that tried to get in my truck the last time I did a cross country roadtrip. He has been real busy since I saw him in Texas. He killed an attorney on the East Coast and investigators are linking him to a series of murders all across the country.

I started peering around and saw he had a Facebook page.SEVERAL FB pages. YouTube.Soundcloud.Photobucket.

*~CULT HERO Internet Celebrity Kills Attorney~*

WHAT THE FUK!?! I feel kinda boggled.

The smiling JackedUpJesus hitcher is a killer who wanted me to give him a ride in Shamrock Texas on a rainy day.

Thank you BarbWire, you have always been my voice of reason and the best friend I have in this world.

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Shrouded in Viral Mystery, Kai the Hitchhiker Gains a Cult Following
By Sam Laird Feb 06, 2013

And on the eighth day, to quote a famous speech, God looked down on his planned paradise and said, "I need a caretaker." So God, to paraphrase said speech, made Kai.That's Kai the hitchhiker. Kai the hatchet-wielding saver of lives. Kai the longhaired viral sensation who's become known around the globe despite an off-the-grid lifestyle that's left him apparently oblivious to his burgeoning fame.

See, last Friday, down in Fresno, Calif., Kai helped save a man and a woman. He helped save them from an epithet-spewing, Jesus-invoking mountain of a man hell-bent on violence and destruction. The man had purposely run his car into an African-American utility worker then attacked the woman when she tried to intervene. His attack didn't stop until Kai, a drifter simply thumbing his way through town, went at him with a hatchet. The man lived, but the attack ended.

Kai then gave an all-time classic interview about the incident to KMPH FOX 26 reporter Jessob Reisbeck. The clip, featuring an epic "Smash! Smash! Suh-MASH!" hatchet reenactment, has since gone wildly viral online. Reisbeck's report and an unedited version of Kai's profanity-laced interview have been viewed on YouTube more than 1.6 million times since Saturday.

People from as far away as Ireland and Australia have lauded Kai and his ebullient personality — part adrenaline-jacked stoner, part existential bodhisattva — as a paragon of positivity.

But there's just one problem.Aside from a sporadic series of Facebook updates, Kai has disappeared from public view almost entirely. He's a chosen vagabond, largely cut off from communication, digital or otherwise. For now, at least, he exists apart from the mainstream world that so badly wants a piece of him."He's kind of like a superhero," Reisbeck tells Mashable. "He's impossible to get ahold of because he has no phone and he's this mysterious guy, but he has this hero status."

* * *"Do you have a last name?" Reisbeck asked Kai during their Friday interview."No, bro," Kai said. "I don't have anything"

* * *Reisbeck's Kai coverage has since gone viral and been featured on CNN, Jim Rome, The Soup and The Colbert Report. Cartoons and memes have been made in Kai's honor. But until meeting with Reisbeck on Wednesday for a follow-up interview set to air later this week, Kai himself has had virtually nothing to say. No one, it seems, can get ahold of him. (Believe us, we've tried.)

* * *Christian Worzalla lives in Wisconsin. He's 32 years old. He's never met Kai. He's one of the admins of the "Kai of Dogtown fanpage" on Facebook. He also runs a GoFundMe campaign that aims to raise $1,500 for Kai.In two days, 32 people have donated $321 to the GoFundMe campaign.

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Caleb McGillvary, aka Kai the Hatchet Wielding Hitchhiker, is wanted in the murder of a New Jersey man. He became an Internet celebrity after using a hatchet to stop a homicidal man who claimed he was Jesus from killing innocent people, but now it appears the tables have turned on Caleb McGillvary.McGillvary, better known as Kai the Hatched Wielding Hitchhiker, is wanted in the homicide of Joseph Galfy, a lawyer who was found dead in his New Jersey home May 13. WABC reported the cause of death as blunt force trauma.

In a press conference Thursday morning, Union County prosecutor Theodore Romankow said McGillvary is believed to have has cut his hair short in an attempt to conceal his identity and is considered "armed and dangerous", the Star-Ledger writes. A $5,000 reward has been announced for information leading to his arrest. Mashable notes that a cryptic status update on what appears to be McGillvary's Facebook page may hold clues about what prompted the "dark turn" in the viral celebrity's story:

Those with information about McGillvary are urged to contact Union County Crime Stoppers at (908) 654-TIPS (8477), www.uctip.org or text UCTIP plus a message to 274637.

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Hatchet Wielding Hitchhiker' arrested in Clark murder

Eyewitness News

CLARK, N.J. (WABC) -- Internet celebrity "Kai the Hatchet Wielding Hitchhiker" has been arrested in the murder of a Clark, New Jersey man.The suspect Caleb Lawrence McGillvary was captured by Philadelphia Police at the Greyhound Bus station in Philadelphia. The 24-year-old Internet celebrity is well known on Facebook and YouTube as "Kai the Hatchet Wielding Hitchhiker."

McGillvary is homeless but considers himself "homefree" and relies on the generosity of strangers for food, lodging and transportation. He is also known as Kai Lawrence, Caleb Kai Lawrence and Kai Nicodemus.

The victim, Joseph Galfy, was found inside his home on Starlite Drive on Monday. An autopsy performed the following day determined that Galfy died as a result of "blunt force trauma". Investigators said Kai met the attorney near Times Square, and a surveillance camera captured images of them.

A post was made to his Facebook page on Tuesday in which Kai claims he was raped by the man. Kai later reached out to some fans in South Jersey, who took him to a train station.

The Union County Homicide Task Force is working with local, state, and Federal officials to locate McGillvary. He is charged with murder in Union County and bail has been set at $3 million by Superior Court Judge Stuart Peim. "I am grateful for the overwhelming response and dedicated effort by the public and law enforcement that led to this arrest," said Romankow. "I believe that everyone is a little safer with this person off the streets."

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Facebook post.

I graciously acknowledge all the female (and male!) attention I've been receiving, and appreciate it a LOT. my self esteem has gone to the roof of equality and is doing a little happiness without going through it. I haven't acted on it because a lot of people just expect me to tango with them for posterity sake and not for who I am. well, if you've been wanting either now's the time. I'm looking for a single womyn between the age of 18-30, who is confident in who she is and realizes that this will probably change both our lives, hopefully for the better. I'd most def like to meet you first, I think that the script will be something that could put womyn's rights ahead by a generation.
So now that april fools is over the real trick is that i was serious about the porn flick for all who are aware of the half naked pic of me theres apparently a lot of people who want to do a lot of stuff with this dude and i am so in. i want to do an pro womens rights porno about how to deal with pushy guys.

In response to the above message he got many replies.

1. kai will you backpack india with me
2.I'll do the filming. Indie filmmaker here, love you and what you stand for.
3.Kai, it was nice to meet you last weekend, you're awesome
4.I'm not sure how porn can help women's rights....I'm one year too young anyway, but still love you, Kai...ultimate respect & admiration for you.Also I loved the original shirtless picture, haha!
5.Can I just say I would MARRY THIS MAN. His reply (thanks, I'm in new york if you want to hear the bells.)
7.Shaka Kai. Hit me up if you on the right coast. Got a great quiver to choose from.
8.Kai I Just want to let you know I always pick up hitchhikers :) Especially the Pacific Crest hikers!!!
9. If I ever meet you, you get beer and dinner!
10.Kai needs a reality show. He is fantastic. He would make a great motivational speaker helping kids who may have suffered or are currently suffering the same hardships!
11.Yo, Kai I've been chatting with 2 of your friends in Fresno. Liz and Derek. Would be awesome to meet with you. I can offer you my couch along with food and drinks if you'd like in Santa Monica. I run a clothing brand focused around the HomeFREE. Prey Apparel.
12.You are an enlightened person and the world is a better place with you in it!

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What say you? Good guy or bad guy? Down and out loser or sociopath hustler or internet hero?

Favorite Band:Bloody Hammers
19 hours ago
We have received some recent mail about one of our fans Caleb “Kai” McGillvary and his alleged murder charges. Being the only band he has 'liked' on his page and the irony of our name around the accusations has brought us some unfortunate attention. Condolences to all involved, but we hope that Kai is found innocent.

Caleb Kai Lawrence Yodhehwawheh
May 14
what would you do if you woke up with a groggy head, metallic taste in your mouth, in a strangers house... walked to the mirror and seen come dripping from the side of your face from your mouth, and started wretching, realizing that someone had drugged, raped, and blown their fuckin load in you? what would you do?

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This list is from "Profile of a Sociopath." Is is a pretty good list of sociopathic indicators.

Glibness/superficial charm
Manipulative and cunning
Grandiose sense of self
Lack of remorse, shame or guilt
Promiscuous sexual behavior/infidelity
Lack of realistic life plan/parasitic lifestyle
Criminal or entrepreneurial versatility
Secretive
Only rarely in difficulty with the law, but seeks out situations where their tyrannical
behavior will be tolerated, condoned, or admired
Has an emotional need to justify their crimes
Unable to feel remorse or guilt

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Cult hero or maniac with hatchet. Maybe both? What do you think? These photos show how he changed his looks. The last photos of him show him with facial tats and short hair, he was on the run.

FB and YouTube pages.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHmnpFEVWIU
https://www.facebook.com/yodhehwawheh
http://soundcloud.com/kai-stormbird
http://s841.photobucket.com/user/herbaless/media/DSCN2051_zps7130669c.jpg.html
https://www.facebook.com/KaiOfDogtown?fref=ts
http://mashable.com/2013/02/06/kai-the-hitchhiker/

If you are so inclined, there are several places you can donate for his legal fund. Bail has been set at 3 million. I am not so inclined since his dog hasn't been charged.

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Kai-the-Hitchhiker-Legal-Support-Page/131972146999628?ref=hl

kai ya loom.jpg
kai ya loom.jpg

kai jesus quote.png
kai jesus quote.png

Kai-faveband.jpg
Kai-faveband.jpg

kai tha hitcher.jpg
kai tha hitcher.jpg

kai-Kimmel show.jpg
kai-Kimmel show.jpg

kai-Kimmel.jpg
kai-Kimmel.jpg

kaiparties.jpg
kaiparties.jpg

kaihovel.jpg
kaihovel.jpg

rabbits.gif
rabbits.gif

Tweeter Does Starbucks.jpg
Tweeter Does Starbucks.jpg

the adventures of tweeter and roadsong.jpg
the adventures of tweeter and roadsong.jpg

ole betsy.gif
ole betsy.gif

A good day to die.gif
A good day to die.gif

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330466_306018119425320_973822135_o.jpg

kai mug shot.jpg
kai mug shot.jpg

kai tat.jpg
kai tat.jpg

roadie.jpg
roadie.jpg

winter spring summer or fall all you got to do is call and I will be right there yes I will.JPG
winter spring summer or fall all you got to do is call and I will be right there yes I will.JPG


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Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-05-29 23:37:59 EDT (#)

You REALLY need to get an account you can post with. People may not want to rise to old bait and bicker about issues that have been bickered to death. I know how you feel about me and my posts and it's fine. Really. It seems to me that I remember your posts as witty and full o quirks. Get to posting bucko.

Sincerely,
Stevie Hicks

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2013-05-29 21:56:35 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

Yeah see I still fail to see how my comments could've been perceived as anti-american, I mean the catholic church is a predominantly *american* institution and of course poverty, domestic violence - genocide, people being sold into prostitution and war crimes, they're all synonymous with the US......I'm not sure if landmines that little kids step on in Asia and Africa are american made - nor did I give it any thought because that wasn't the point I was trying to make. But of course roadsong's fagbook friends will read into it what they may, and I realise it's an unpopular stance to not fawn over her but see that doesn't bother me, she just doesn't float my boat. I don't like her boring, formulaic posts, her everybody-like-me auto+2 rating policy, her 'braying like a donkey', her 'fukitols', 'twas's' and least of all her encouraging that fuckwit the puzzle-dickhead to post more often.

Do I need to touch on my dislike for your antiquated gun laws again? Which *was* a deliberate discourtesy directed at your peculiar country and is STILL more sorry than a cold, wet, homeless dog? Okay why not. I find them repulsive. What I find even MORE repulsive is the way some of you embrace/celebrate them. I've read too many posts/comments from the likes of skrap and silvr about how armed to the teeth they are and how much they like shooting stuff - from "I own this many guns and even have knives under the car seat" to "hell, I'd even support jumping out of a tree and slitting something's throat if it were a (hunting) season" to be left with no doubt that it's all a bit odd - and unsettling. Of course skrap likes to pass off his gun obsession with protection and enjoying target practice, which still doesn't explain the jumping out of a tree and slitting something's throat bit but then I guess that's technically knives, so it must be different. And let's not forget my bestie roadsong. When *she* jumped on what she (I'm sure hoped) would become a bandwagon after some backwoods redneck minuteman posted a picture of his super cool gun, and in turn posted her own gunwhore to show us all how cool she was as well, she removed the post only hours later as Sandy Hook unfolded, apparently because she wanted to be sensitive to the victims and their families, not because she looked like a twat.

But ALL that aside, anti-american or no, I stand by my belief that your stupid amendment is sorrier than a cold wet dog, or somebody that feeds their dog fast food.

Oh and Anglophile, you're incorrect on two counts. Firstly, I'm not ugly - at least not on the outside. I don't think I've made any secret of the fact that I am probably the most handsome man on the internet my incredible good looks - like my skin complexion and adroit athletic ability are purely down to genetics, it's sweet as. On the inside however it's entirely different I'm xenophobic, racist, vain and I have a heart as black as tar.

And secondly, speaking of secrets, I think 99.9% of all roadsong slurs on the uberboard are attributed to me by most users, I've made it perfectly clear on numerous occasions that I find her annoying so apart from other things like "somebody put a fart in my bottom", "I'm not watching the thundercats right now, really I'm not" and "I wish I could have a black man as a pet", I don't imagine my uberboard comments are anonymous in the slightest, which is pretty rich coming from you - considering you're an alter, Michael. well probably.

Okay well I have to go now and watch The Bachelor, then go shoot some americans in Battlefield (but just the black ones).

It's been nice.

Submitted by grÜeMaster emeritus and uberlord supreme at 2013-05-29 20:22:35 EDT (#)

old fag below

Submitted by redskieslookfake at 2013-05-29 13:04:19 EDT (#)

Submitted by Anglophile at 2013-05-29 04:45:53 BST (#)
Rating: 2

Pretty shitty comeback there, D_R. You have been outclassed at least 100 to 1. Stick to asinine remarks on the uberboard so you may at least remain anonymous and save what little bit of ugly face you have left.
----
ouch

Submitted by OathMeal at 2013-05-29 10:03:12 EDT (#)

lol Stevie Hicks

Submitted by Anglophile at 2013-05-28 23:45:53 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Pretty shitty comeback there, D_R. You have been outclassed at least 100 to 1. Stick to asinine remarks on the uberboard so you may at least remain anonymous and save what little bit of ugly face you have left.

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2013-05-28 23:37:53 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

Wrong again you daft old hillbilly. The ONLY thing I listed that can be solely attributed to america (and that *I* identify) with the ah.....the 'greatest nation on earth' is your unenlightened backward obsession with firearms. I was merely rattling off the first things that came to mind that were clearly much more sorry than a stupid fucking wet dog. Speaking of stupid (and ironic), quit plying your dog with mcdonalds, jesus FUCK it's bad enough that people shove the shit into their own gobs let alone feed it to their pets.

Anyhoo; my referencing drones and wedding parties and the apparent subsequent disregard for the loss of muslim lives as opposed to massive outpourings of grief for a few of 'our own', be they english Australian European or american is, like war crimes poverty landmines the catholic church et al not exclusive to the land of the free - nor is being free for that matter (just so you know). I can see however, given that the example I used included Boston that it may have been construed that way so for that I apologise. Please rest assured that it is not lost on me (and a cause of perpetual embarrassment) that Australia is as guilty as anyone concerning most of the things I touched on, except of course your stupid fucking amendment. Again, stevie hicks, I was merely pointing out things that were 'more sorry than a cold wet homeless dog', so - in closing, shove it up your moth eaten *jumper.


*that's a 'sweater' boss hog.

and yes I may be (part) Aboriginal - I have an olive complexion and am quite athletic. Plus I'm adopted so I might have been stolen from my abo mum after she was impregnated by a rich (and handsome) station owner then SEcreted away and sold to unassuming german immigrants who were told that I was one of those 'new, darker lutherans'.

Submitted by OathMeal at 2013-05-28 23:35:16 EDT (#)

Damn...D_R just got served.

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2013-05-28 23:34:09 EDT (#)

DanRan pwnt below.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-05-28 22:43:09 EDT (#)



"And I'll tell you something else grizzly madams, there are a LOT of things sorrier than a cold wet homeless dog you muppet. There's your stupid fucking second amendment, little kids stepping on landmines, the catholic church, the sex-slave trade, war crimes, domestic violence, genocide, poverty, drones blowing up wedding parties without a LICK of remorse for those killed - counterUNbalanced with gnashing of teeth for three people killed in Boston and cold, wet, homeless human beings - so stfu you self-indulgent hippy."

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Yes of course you are right concerning "..little kids stepping on landmines, the catholic church, the sex-slave trade, war crimes, domestic violence, genocide, poverty, drones blowing up wedding parties without a LICK of remorse for those killed - counterUNbalanced with gnashing of teeth for three people killed in Boston and cold, wet, homeless human beings -".

I am editing one line in my story from "There is nothing sorrier in the world than a cold wet homeless dog." To: "There aren't many things sorrier in the world than a cold wet homeless dog."

It seems to me that because I am an American, you think I have something to do with war crimes and drones blowing up wedding parties. It is my belief that all troops should return to their own countries. There is plenty for the troops to do at home, bridge and road repair, helping with natural disasters etc.

Australia is considered to be one of the major contributors of troops under the NATO-led International Security Assistance Force mission in Afghanistan and has deployed more special forces in Afghanistan following United States and United Kingdom. YOU are an Aussie, correct?

What about the continued genocide and lack of civil rights of the Native peoples of Australia? Are you Aboriginal?

The rates of incarceration of young Aboriginal people (25 times the rate of non-Aboriginal young people) reeks of racism.

Aboriginal health.

While Canada, the United States and New Zealand have managed to lift the health standards in their Indigenous communities since the 1980s, Australian Aboriginal people suffer worsening health.

Aboriginal infant mortality rate compared to other Australians. 80% die under the age of one.

Times Aboriginal children are more likely to suffer from anemia and malnutrition due to iron deficiencies. 7-12 times.

Times 25-34 year-old Aboriginal Australians are more likely to die from heart disease than non-Aboriginal Australians 25.
Percentage of the overall Federal health expenditure in 2009 which was spent on Aboriginal health 30%
Percentage of adults in Aboriginal communities suffering from type-2 diabetes, 2-4 times (and may be as much as 10 times)than that of non-indigenous Australians. The Aboriginal death rate from diabetes is believed to be up to 17 times that of non-indigenous Australians.
Number of Indigenous homes having functioning WATER, WASTE, COOKING and cleaning facilities (of 4,000 Indigenous homes surveyed. 6.5%
Percentage of Aboriginal children who had some decayed, or missing teeth.83%.
Percentage Aboriginal people are more likely to die from all cancer types than non-Indigenous people 60%.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HTCuXY9AJ6Y

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H6V82LD51UA&list=PLD81ABB3BD7CF4B1F

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hhqAFLud228&list=PLD81ABB3BD7CF4B1F

Concerning Civil and Human Rights, I FOUGHT for the rights of people. I was set upon by dogs, fire hosed, beaten and jailed. Until you can claim you have done something (anything) to help people in your country, your opinion of me or of my country means little.

People who live in glass houses and all that Danger Ranger. None of the problems of the world are your fault right?

Sincerely,
grizzly madam

Submitted by grÜeMaster emeritus and uberlord supreme at 2013-05-28 04:39:33 EDT (#)

fag below

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2013-05-28 03:32:49 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2013-05-28 03:32:17 EDT (#)

"Here's breakfast for the dog, you eat what's left after you feed him"
-------------------

I see what you're going for here, grizzled - saddle weary, faux Clint Eastwood tough but still soft enough under that jaded and gruff exterior to show concern for a wretched malnourished animal - or maybe even pity for a prostitute disfigured by cowardly drunks in a small frontier town run by a blase Gene Hackman, but unfortunately you only pulled-off presumptuous and holier-than-thou pharisaic.

And I'll tell you something else grizzly madams, there are a LOT of things sorrier than a cold wet homeless dog you muppet. There's your stupid fucking second amendment, little kids stepping on landmines, the catholic church, the sex-slave trade, war crimes, domestic violence, genocide, poverty, drones blowing up wedding parties without a LICK of remorse for those killed - counterUNbalanced with gnashing of teeth for three people killed in Boston and cold, wet, homeless human beings - so stfu you self-indulgent hippy.

Submitted by Wisher at 2013-05-28 02:46:41 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

PS: link is on my Amazon Wish List.....

Submitted by Wisher at 2013-05-28 02:38:33 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Christ on crack, L.!!! ~~ this post has everything but night~vision goggles & a http://www.amazon.com/California-Exotics-Butterfly-Kiss-Pink/dp/B001H55N7C/ref=sr_1_1?s=hpc&ie=UTF8&qid=1369722620&sr=1-1

~~~~~~~~Peace & love & stuff to you all!!

Submitted by grÜeMaster emeritus and uberlord supreme at 2013-05-22 19:17:45 EDT (#)

ubersite's second biggest fag below

Submitted by Snark at 2013-05-22 18:50:40 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by ASO at 2013-05-22 14:23:06 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Killer story, brah

Submitted by Yozz at 2013-05-22 10:15:21 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Not as dumb as he looks, below.

Submitted by McBain at 2013-05-22 09:28:57 EDT (#)

This list is from "Profile of a Perkman." Is is a pretty good list of sociopathic indicators.

Glibness/superficial charm
Manipulative and cunning
Grandiose sense of self
Pathological lying
Lack of remorse, shame or guilt
Shallow emotions
Incapacity for love
Need for stimulation
Callousness/lack of empathy
Poor behavioral controls/impulsive nature
Early behavior problems/juvenile delinquency
Irresponsibility/unreliability
Promiscuous sexual behavior/infidelity
Lack of realistic life plan/parasitic lifestyle
Criminal or entrepreneurial versatility
Does not perceive that anything is wrong with them
Secretive
Paranoid
Only rarely in difficulty with the law, but seeks out situations where their tyrannical behavior will be tolerated, condoned, or admired
Goal of enslavement of their victim(s)
Has an emotional need to justify their crimes and therefore needs their victim's affirmation (respect, gratitude and love)
Unable to feel remorse or guilt
Narcissism, grandiosity (self-importance not based on achievements)

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-05-21 12:30:24 EDT (#)

Dreamed about this drifter last night. Sad twisted childhood, he came from a place of anger and abuse and grew up clawing and struggling to survive.. He is a stranger in a strange land and there is no help for him now. What a damn shame.

When the Orca goes mad from a lifetime of meaningless tricks at SeaWorld, and then snaps and kills, I feel empathy for him.

Submitted by Ducky at 2013-05-21 09:22:50 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Some awesome pictures, and names like Kai should be reserved for cats or Kevin Spacey.

Can someone do an RIP post for Ray Manzarek? Any takers?

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-05-21 02:39:00 EDT (#)

RAD 3! Watch it!


Submitted by orphelia at 2013-05-21 02:07:59 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Super, roadie.

Submitted by VelvetElvis at 2013-05-21 01:34:19 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Fuckin hell! Effort! - do you get paid for this? I'd demand it. I recall your old Mustang post. Cool. Here's something else cool.


http://www.surfermag.com/blogs/industry-news/get-rad-3-movie-premiere/

Submitted by Perk "Grownman Perkiness" man at 2013-05-20 23:31:05 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

Kai is what I call "California Crazy".. seems chill, traveled, beach bum, unassuming, and noble (in his own context) to a fault. The problem with all this Atheism, and Liberal, and Republican etc... polarizing time with people is that, when there is no median to stand on, more extreme behavior becomes the norm, as well as it gets more extreme and serious.

If he killed the man, he only did what many men utter every single day that "if they were raped, or forced in prison they would kill someone"... when that is the sentiment of many, and then you have a guy that is on the outskirts, wild friends that are nutty too, and they are California Crazy (the only spot I've been too where the rich and the poor frequent the same block, or areas, or live amongst each other but self segregate) which means that seeing people living in the lap of luxury while you're starving or going nuts is hard, or living off the grid. Then the weird hippie, but righteous philosophies end up becoming prevalent.

The thing is having someone whom is "righteous" in their philosophy is crazy. Think "suicide bomber" mentality. They have enough belief in there rightness to do it, regardless of societies views on the issue at hand, as well if even done.. they will have many people that will follow and justify it. You can justify anything... California taught me that.

Submitted by Anglophile at 2013-05-20 18:54:56 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by grÜeMaster emeritus and uberlord supreme at 2013-05-20 18:20:21 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

manteaser below

Submitted by ilikesteak at 2013-05-20 18:08:50 EDT (#)

roadie, it's the visual instructions and materials how to build a hovel (house).

Rope to use as a hanging support line for the three tarps as a suspended ceiling and walls. You use rope for everything. It really ties the room together. the four tees are his only standing support for the structure.

Moss fills in gaps in whatever forged materials he is using. It absorbs water and keeps his things dry making it last longer.

The hot water revoir is so he can shower/clean himself. Nobody wants to give money to someone who smells bad.

The crab trap is for wildlife. Food that he catches himself will make what is given to him last longer, meaning he won't have to ask as often, meaning people are more likely to give to him when her needs it.


Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-05-20 15:38:25 EDT (#)

I am wondering what the hitcher has made a drawing of in this photo. kaihovel.jpg
He mentions "chain hoop-crab trap-water-200 ft.of rope". Anybody know what the diagram depicts? I have never seen anything like this.




Get your hot water rope trap away from my Tweeter Mr.HitcherHatchet!


Submitted by Shlongy at 2013-05-20 15:25:47 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Shlongy has been extremely generous with his arsenal of +2's lately.

I gave out one in April, too.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-05-20 15:07:54 EDT (#)

thou shalt not pick up random road people to travel with, dog or not.




I KNOW right? We have talked about this before! I will never waver again. It was just the ONE time and ... yesh

*wanders off whistling

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-05-20 15:03:24 EDT (#)

TL; DR.

Well you might want to read a teeny bit since I almost got SUH MASHED by a serial killer! haaa

Submitted by FALLEN at 2013-05-20 14:48:39 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Roadie, thou shalt not pick up random road people to travel with, dog or not.

rememeber that.


also...Tweeter!!

Submitted by Sage at 2013-05-20 14:09:25 EDT (#)

HOLY SHIT. A +2 FROM SHLONGY. PIGS MUST BE FUCKING FLYING.

Submitted by Sage at 2013-05-20 14:08:57 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

TL; DR. I just came for the pictures. Roadie posts always have good pictures.

Submitted by ilikesteak at 2013-05-20 13:59:53 EDT (#)

It's too bad that you can't just find him and start killing other people wherever he is. They'd totally blame it on him. Seriously, it's free murder. Maybe get some hair or one of his hats/bandanas and leave it at the scene of the crime.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-05-20 13:26:35 EDT (#)

Police say, according to ABC, that they’ve found a string of unsolved homicides in Kai’s wake, though they’re not as of yet accusing him of any additional murders.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-05-20 12:31:51 EDT (#)

I did indeed "properly recycle that three-bladed piece of crap"! I bought it at a truck stop as a gift for a friend who had asked me to "keep an eye out for one of those whirlie throwing star knives". The blades deployed after you threw it. My friend collects and was pleased. He is a Kentucky farmer over 80 years old and I owe him a lot. He has hundreds of acres and has kept my horses for me for years at a time and won't allow me to pay a cent for boarding.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-05-20 12:19:46 EDT (#)

My last cross country tripping was during the long Uber vacation (whenever that was). I had pretty much forgotten about this hitcher until I saw him on TV recently. I meet lots of people on my adventures, but this KILLER was the only person that I even considered giving a ride.

Since finding out that Kai is known as "The Hatchet Hitcher", I have remembered a few more things about my encounter with him. He had an old bicycle and he told me he had ridden it from Cali to Florida and was headed back to Cali by way of Texas. He said he was tired of pedaling and needed a ride. I think the bike and the dog were reasons he targeted me. I had a trailer, and he could have taken both dog and bike along if he got a ride with me. Plus, I was alone. That poor dog looked played out, he really looked like he had run alongside Kai all the way. I asked why he was riding that bike cross country, he said he was trying to "..get my head right after too much good dope..". He said more, and the conversation is slowly starting to come back to me.

I am wondering if the authorities are aware of the extent of his travels as they investigate the series of crimes and unsolved murders they suspect him of...

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2013-05-20 11:57:46 EDT (#)

TWEETER

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2013-05-20 10:42:34 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

A brush with infamy. Nice pictures too.

Also: Please consider the environment and properly recycle that three-bladed piece of crap as soon as possible after you get a knife you can actually use. Smith & Wesson makes a fine military boot knife that's only like $20 in any sporting goods store and *bonus* you won't slice your hands into long-term uselessness trying to get it into ready position in a hurry.

Submitted by Shlongy at 2013-05-20 10:24:26 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I finally read this...

Submitted by Shlongy at 2013-05-20 08:25:39 EDT (#)

Kai's a killer.

Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB at 2013-05-20 08:23:50 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

He would probably be cool to party with, but I wouldn't want to have him as a roommate or anything.


Homer: Look at that. I'm the first non-Brazilian person to travel
backwards through time.

Mr. Peabody:
Correction, Homer, you're the second.

Sherman:
That's right, Mr. Peabody!

Mr. Peabody:
Quiet, you.

Treehouse of Horror V