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Winter Wishes and Headlines from around the world.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-12-30 22:58:52 EST
Rating: 2.0 on 11 ratings (18 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

Most wish for a better world, few agree on how best to manifest this wish. Tree Monkey party hats and noisemaker toots for all.

Snacks anyone? Crescent roll dough wrapped around cocktail weiners and baked to a golden brown? No?


Remember no man is a failure who has friends.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z3sXVxqDbFk


Blue Cheese ball covered with sliced almonds served with communion wafers? No?

2012 has been a real bitch. Better days ahead Uber, better days...


Every year human beings surpass their previous record in the category of flat out weirdness. Yin relies on yang just as much as heat relies on cold or light relies on dark. On the other hand, maybe there are just more cameras around these days to catch people in the act. Either way, there were times when 2012 seemed very strange.


Scientists Enhance the Intelligence of Primates with a Chip.

Gothenburg, Sweden, an otherwise modern enough town where a Swedish woman was convicted of disturbing the peace -- but not of the living, of the dead. How does one do that, exactly? In this case, the 37-year-old woman who denied the charges was convicted of using human bones as sex toys.

Steve Mann, the "father of wearable computing," was physically assaulted while visiting a McDonalds in Paris.

Perhaps one of the more painful stories of the year came from Elblag, Poland, where Tomasz Paczkowski, 32, said he was helping his wife with the housework, but was paying more attention to a boxing match on television than to what he was doing. When the phone rang, Paczkowski picked up the hot iron and pressed it to his ear.

Porn star sues over rear end collision.

Australian army vehicle goes missing after being painted camouflage.

Man beats off cougar with his bare hands.

Great Dane reaches a height of 7-foot-4. Guinness crowned the three-year-old the world's Tallest Dog.

Three cans of hairspray, one large bottle of gel, and 15 years later, Kazuhiro Watanabe became the Guinness World Record holder for tallest mohawk, standing at 3-foot, 8.6-inches atop his 5-foot-7 frame.

Neuroscientists confirmed that it was possible to communicate with some patients locked in a vegetative state by using an fMRI scanner.

Swiss Shepherd dog Talli adopted and nursed three orphaned tiger cubs -- Olymp, Dar and, one named Talli after herself -- who were abandoned by their birth mother, tigress Bagira, in southern Russia.

Condom truck tips, spills load.

Psychics predict world did not end yesterday.

"Mexican Vampire Woman" Maria Jose Cristerna took a stand against domestic violence, announcing that it was the impetus for her physical transformation.

A Child Attends School By Sending a Robot in His Place.

Authorities in Florida said they arrested a United Parcel Service worker for allegedly stealing packages, including an iPad and a box of cookies.

A-Rod goes deep, Wang hurt.

The strangest technique of the year in the everlasting search for love may have occurred in Hollywood, Fla., where authorities arrested a man for posing as a dentist and kissing a female patient on the buttocks after giving her an injection.

Students cook and serve grandparents.

Irishman and British woman sentenced to three months in jail and deportation for having sex in the back of a taxi cab in the United Arab Emirates.

Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers.

Piedmont, Okla., police officer fired after writing a $2,500 ticket for the mother of a 3-year-old who had urinated on the front lawn of the family's home.

Man eats 28 raw eggs, dies.

Bert and Ernie arrested for public boinking aboard Napa Valley Wine Train.

A Paralyzed Woman Controls a Robotic Arm Using Only Her Mind.

A formerly 35.2-pound Texas cat has lost 6.6 pounds -- or about 20 percent of his body weight -- after being put on a restricted diet, doctors say.

Enraged cow injures farmer with ax.

Two men were arrested in Hemet, Calif., for allegedly stealing cooking grease from a McDonald's restaurant, police said.

Park rangers in the Florida Everglades are offering visitors loaner bungee cords and tarps to protect their cars from marauding vultures.

Plane too close to ground, crash probe told.

2 sisters reunited after 18 years in checkout counter.

Self-Driving Cars Become Legal in Several States.

A Japanese man pushing 116 years old was declared the world's oldest-living person this week, city officials in Kyoto Prefecture said Friday.

"Private Wojtek," a brown bear adopted by a unit of Polish soldiers during World War II, is to be honored with a memorial statue in the Scottish capital.

Typhoon rips through cemetery; hundreds dead.

Tiger Woods plays with own balls.

"Nintendonitis" has been used to describe tendon injuries (tendinosis) of the hands and wrists. Users have reported stress injuries from playing games such as Wii Sports for too long. Serious injuries caused by playing in tight spaces can also occur.

"Whatever" remains the most annoying word or phrase in the English language, a poll indicates.

Authorities in Florida said they arrested a woman accused of lighting a mattress on fire while her ex-boyfriend slept on it with another woman.

An Illinois man who admitted planning a bank robbery to fund his going-to-jail party for a drug conviction was sentenced to 19 months in prison for the plot.

Researchers Create a Robot With Legs That Can Run Faster Than any Human.

Drunk gets nine months in violin case.

On an Aussie iron.... "WARNING - NEVER IRON CLOTHES ON THE BODY".

Pussweasel and Dr. Wackville marry at Stonehenge during Winter Solstice.

Police in Sweden said they are searching for 69 cows that vanished from a farm on the day they were to be slaughtered.

Friendly bobcat taught to fear humans.

Yes, you can get addicted to playing video games. Video game addiction is an impulse control disorder, similar to compulsive gambling. Symptons include weight loss or gain, lack of personal hygiene, lowered social interaction and a disrupted sleep pattern.

Language Monitor in Texas has chosen "apocalypse" the top word of the year, with "Gangnam Style" tabbed the top phrase of 2012.

Australian police said they were looking into whether the theft of 10 exotic birds from a wildlife park could have been an inside job.

British left waffles on Falkland Islands.

A Swedish hospital said new precautions are being taken after a dentist's drill unattached during a procedure and ended up in a patient's lung.

On a blanket label from Taiwan: NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.

New study of obesity looks for larger test group.

Authorities in Turkey said they are investigating after a college student reported someone hacked his Knight Online game account and stole his character.

A South Carolina woman said she was shocked to discover her ex-boyfriend from 12 years ago has been living in her attic.

A common vision problem among gamers is known as "Guitar Hero/Rock Band Eyes." This is similar to the Tetris Effect because it involves seeing the graphic interface burned into your retinas long after you've stopped playing.

German prince lets bison loose in Western Europe for first time in more than 250 years.

Wife blew the coop with a knife grinder.

Police search for at least 672 kids missing in the United States.

Fridolin the pony, who is only about 2 feet (60 centimeters) tall, went missing from the Vienna Christmas Circus ...

Grandmother 'comes back from the dead just minutes before post-mortem' after spending THREE DAYS in the morgue.

Alien Skulls Discovered in Mexico.

Peruvians come to blows to end conflict.

SBI probing 2 guards over inmate hot sauce abuse.

German scientists seek to clone perfect Xmas trees.

Woman Sleeps Through Tornado Ripping Off Roof.

Deer kill 17,000.

A Japanese company says it will offer flying drone surveillance technology, previously restricted to governments and the military, to private security firms.

Plane too close to ground, crash probe told.

Chinese couple Celebrates Joint 100th Birthdays.

Dec. 28, 2012. Wis. couple says pet chicken alerted them to blaze. The chicken, which the neighbors kept as a pet, is being credited for saving that family from an early-morning fire Thursday by waking the couple with its vocal clucking.

Digital devices were under a lot of Christmas trees this year as a record 17.5 million Apple or Android devices were activated Christmas Day.

Brad and Angelina Jolie 'bring 12 nannies' to look after their six children during Caribbean getaway.

Man minus ear waives hearing.

Colorado and Washington will let non-sick folks smoke pot just for fun.

Britain's biggest cave recently discovered below Cheddar Gorge.

Rafalka fails to medal and gets shipped home strapped to the fuselage of a 747.




In conclusion, here is a selection of my ever popular dancing gif. images. Why?


If you wish to speak with me I will be in Arizona.
http://www.quartzsitervshow.com/


~~Happy New Year and to all a good night~~


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


One New Years Eve, a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible drunk drivers. At closing time he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. Then he sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. Everyone left the bar and drove off. Finally, he started his engine and began to pull away.

The police officer was waiting for him. He stopped the driver, read him his rights and administered a Breathalyzer test. The results showed a reading of 0.0. The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be.

The driver replied, "Tonight, I'm the designated decoy."






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DSCN2796.JPG

New Years Eve.gif
New Years Eve.gif

another new year.gif
another new year.gif

patience U sot.jpg
patience U sot.jpg

the road to give a fuk.jpg
the road to give a fuk.jpg

Clucker Saves Family at house fire.jpg
Clucker Saves Family at house fire.jpg


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Submitted by grÜeMaster emeritus and uberlord supreme at 2013-01-16 22:31:57 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe at 2013-01-11 02:06:53 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-01-07 13:11:55 EST (#)

I've heard the 'designated drunk' story too many times -
~~~~~~~~~~~
Well damn! I just hear the joke last week!

-----------------

You obviously don't get drunk often enough. I first heard this joke when I was 13....from my dad......

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-01-07 13:29:15 EST (#)

Ridick sighting somewhere below
~~~~
yep!

Submitted by FALLEN at 2013-01-07 13:24:16 EST (#)

Ridick sighting somewhere below

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-01-07 13:12:32 EST (#)

SQUIRREL!
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hey buddy!

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-01-07 13:11:55 EST (#)

I've heard the 'designated drunk' story too many times -
~~~~~~~~~~~
Well damn! I just hear the joke last week!

Submitted by ridiculous at 2013-01-07 11:02:50 EST (#)
Rating: 2

SQUIRREL!

Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe at 2013-01-04 05:58:36 EST (#)
Rating: 2

This was really cool, although I've heard the 'designated drunk' story too many times. The story that stands out for me is the ticket for the child urinating on the lawn, it reminds me of a news story here in New Zealand where a guy was naked in his own kitchen when a lady with her young girl saw him and called the cops for indecent exposure. The lady was on his property without his permission, had decided to cut through his yard and then got offended when she looked in his window to see him naked, and took it to mean that he was acting lewd in front of a young girl. It staggers me that this was even spoken to by the police as a potential peadophile.

In protest, I now walk round naked in my house at every opportunity, unfortunately I live with flat mates so I only get to protest a few times a year.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-01-02 21:56:24 EST (#)

"..Go outside more."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You have a point. However, I have had the flu for a week and couldn't go outside!

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-01-02 21:54:07 EST (#)

Ya, added the collages later.... :)

Submitted by SilvrWolf at 2013-01-02 20:50:25 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Has this been updated or is my memory going bad?

Submitted by EyeInTheSky at 2013-01-02 19:36:03 EST (#)
Rating: 2

+2 (natch...Roadsong)

But....

Too much effort. Go outside more.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-01-02 17:46:13 EST (#)

Budweiser mugs! Hard to break and they keep coffee hot forever! woo

Submitted by Anglophile at 2013-01-02 17:05:27 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by OathMeal at 2012-12-31 12:50:45 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Condom truck tips, spills load.

Submitted by SilvrWolf at 2012-12-31 09:28:41 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Great post

Submitted by FALLEN at 2012-12-31 08:29:35 EST (#)
Rating: 2

epic post

Submitted by Sage at 2012-12-30 23:53:57 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Auto +2 Roadie.

REDSKINS WOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Just squeeze your rage into a bitter little ball and release it at an
appropriate time. Like that day I hit that referee with a whiskey
bottle. 'Member that?

-- Homer Simpson
Whacking Day