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Atheists & Homosexuals & Alcohol

Submitted by Murphy1844 at 2010-12-08 05:05:08 EST
Rating: -0.09 on 38 ratings (38 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

My three favorite things!

I was just outside smoking and thinking about things and asking myself questions and answering the questions to myself that I was asking myself. The question I asked myself was this: Would you prefer the company of an atheist or a homosexual.

I answered myself. I did this in what some people may find a creepy sort of way by kind of whispering it out loud to myself complete with gesticulation and all of that. If someone were watching me I would probably feel embarrassed. My answer was an atheist although, on second thought, it really depends on how hot the homosexual was. If it was Gale Harris asking me this question I wouldn’t really care if the question was in a language I could or couldn’t understand. I would be looking at his eyes and his lips and marveling at how evolution can shit out such a perfect human being.

Since perfect human beings aren’t common or part of my real life I picked an atheist and here’s why. At least I can rest assured that the atheist doesn’t hear fucking voices in his head like his counterpart, a Christian (most commonly here in the US) would. I can trust him more. I can at least know and feel comfortable that his thinking and reasoning and speech reflects that of a reasonable person, however much I may agree or disagree with this imaginary friend, and does not reflect that of someone who would otherwise be classified as schizophrenic.

Why is this important? Well because human solidarity is important. In my view, the most important feeling one can get is that of feeling not alone. Loneliness is like a rash that won’t go away if you pick at it and scratch it on your own. It only goes away if you let someone else pick at it and scratch it. And the kicker is- you have to trust the person in order for you to be able to even expose the rash to begin with, and then trust them even more to start picking and clawing at it. To be clear with this disgusting analogy, a rash properly picked produces finer skin which produces a finer person which produces a finer person who can be fine to his fellow person which produces a domino effect of fineness which we should all strive for. Call it a positive domino effect if you like, because someone who isn’t suffering from an insatiable itch is more willing and more available to scratch other people’s rashes.

I don’t think I’m very clear on this so I’ll take the masturbation stance. The feeling of being horny would be like the itch or the rash. The release of that horniness, or the scratching bit, would be like the scratching bit. Masturbation scratches the itch, but masturbation is such a lonely lonely thing. It’s better not to masturbate but let someone else help you with that so you can feel mutually not so fucking alone.

The atheist realizes this in part because he realizes that human beings are our only chance. There’s no god. That’s why I’d prefer his company.

The homosexual is already a bit fucked up because he’s been marginalized and abused- both explicitly and implicitly. Homos are pretty much damaged goods and are not like other people… their straight counterparts. They don’t strive to be different. In fact, most don’t want to be different to begin with. They just want to be left alone. I, as one of the, just want to be left alone. Why do I bring it up? For starters because it’s on the news like 30% of the time and even when I’m thinking about other things that are a part of me I can’t help but to be punched in the face with these issues because I’m an openly gay man. This morning, driving to work, they talked about CA’s prop 8 and its current discourse in the higher courts of CA. Later this evening it was a full-on interview about “gays” in the military with an author of a book who specializes on that sort of thing, or at least studied it for a period of time. I want to be left alone! Leave me alone!

I’d prefer the company of reasonable people, unless of course they looked like Mr. Harris or Ryan Phillipe or James Franco. I like homosexuals, as fucked up as they are and will probably always be. And booze always kicks ass.

Thanks for reading.

Murphy


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Submitted by Cuddles at 2010-12-13 00:10:39 EST (#)
Rating: 0

But I'm atheist and homosexual...

Submitted by Murphy1844 at 2010-12-10 14:31:15 EST (#)
Rating: 0

... retarded user.

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2010-12-09 15:36:06 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2010-12-08 18:09:23 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2

Also...just as an aside...if the question were "would you rather spend time with a Christian or homosexual?" my answer would remain the same: homosexual.
---------------
retarded question, retarded answer, retarded comment

Submitted by Sage at 2010-12-09 12:05:57 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Snark...quiet you, before I break out the E-meter and give you a good auditing.

Submitted by Snark at 2010-12-08 18:01:50 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2010-12-08 13:20:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Ha! I think the rest of Uber would revolt and -2DIE us forever if I were responsible for bringing it back.

Anyway also another sidebar...before anyone wants to get snarky...I know that the Pharisees were a political party and that Pharisees were Jewish...I am speaking metaphorically when I use the term.


---------------

Go take someone elses name in vain L Ron.

Submitted by misterindifferent at 2010-12-08 15:36:35 EST (#)
Rating: 0

All I read was blah blah blah. mister indifferent does not have time for this.

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2010-12-08 15:30:02 EST (#)
Rating: 0

stfu sage you horrible horse-faced cunt

Submitted by icarus1987 at 2010-12-08 15:06:34 EST (#)
Rating: -2

A. You start with homosexual VS atheist and somehow end up with atheist VS nonatheist. There is no segue or logic that I can see here, just a random hop.

B. I'm not sure what incest-ridden Southern hick shantytown you live in, or if you're just a teenager and as such inherently ignorant, but the bulk of the atheists I've met are far pushier and more obnoxious about their beliefs than the average Catholic/Methodist/Jew. Check out the bulk of uber's religious wars; you actually have some douchebag hypocrite stating that anyone who isn't an atheist should be shot.

Submitted by Sage at 2010-12-08 13:50:45 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Totally unrelated...just got the most adorable call from my 3 year old nephew telling me he wanted new crayons, a football, a basketball, some golf balls, and a (toy) gun with bullets for his birthday! Best 5 minutes of the day...sigh. :)

Submitted by august_sobriquet at 2010-12-08 13:50:22 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Who the fuck said that, below?

Submitted by Murphy1844 at 2010-12-08 13:50:11 EST (#)
Rating: 0

I actually yelled that out loud at a little bar that features live music. The guy plugging his CD's looked at me like he was going to kill me.

Submitted by Murphy1844 at 2010-12-08 13:49:21 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Plug!

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2010-12-08 13:45:10 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Don't you think it would be easier if the reader could just click on your name again and then click on all your posts and then read more of what you have so wittingly donated to http://www.ubersite.com/u/sicosemen for instance?

http://www.ubersite.com/u/sicosemen

sicosemen

Submitted by Murphy1844 at 2010-12-08 13:39:41 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Two out of three, you caught me. I do it because I think it makes it easier on the reader.

Murphy

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2010-12-08 13:38:57 EST (#)
Rating: 0

just teasing...seriously, I have to get back to work although I don't really want to.

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2010-12-08 13:36:45 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Well for someone who is not a narcissist we sure do appreciate you attaching your name to every review. It favors your non-narcissist approach to the ever-changing flow of human interaction, which the latest trend just happens to be facebook.

sicosemen

Submitted by Sage at 2010-12-08 13:33:51 EST (#)
Rating: 2

No prob.

Submitted by Murphy1844 at 2010-12-08 13:33:49 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Oh I'm for sure not an intellectual. I hate the type actually. And I don't drink wine unless it's on sale (and red as blood).

I've been around this place for a while and I know and appreciate that it's basically just a bunch of random people around the world. I've made friends and I've made enemies. I will not succumb to facebook because I'm not narcissist.

My experience in the past has been a bunch of random people getting together and chatting about whatever is on their mind without reservation. At it's peak, it was like a room full of people having a conversation. This, of course, is nothing new on the internet but the social-networking rejectors at least have a place to hide for a while. We

can do it!

Murphy


Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2010-12-08 13:33:00 EST (#)
Rating: 0

That wasn't really directed at you, but thanks for not giving me a full paragraph of nothing for a review :)

Submitted by Sage at 2010-12-08 13:31:55 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I'm not *trying* to do anything...I was just at lunch and wanted to read a post, rate it, and give my $0.02 on what was said. Isn't that really the point of Uber, content (or lack thereof) aside?

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2010-12-08 13:25:17 EST (#)
Rating: 0

PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD: If what you think you're doing is bringing this place "up to where it used to be" shoot me in the face with a botulism gun! This rhetorical banter only amuses the "let-me-prove-I'm-an-intellectual" types.

If you don't have a botulism gun can you can me to death with dented cans?

Submitted by Sage at 2010-12-08 13:20:37 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Ha! I think the rest of Uber would revolt and -2DIE us forever if I were responsible for bringing it back.

Anyway also another sidebar...before anyone wants to get snarky...I know that the Pharisees were a political party and that Pharisees were Jewish...I am speaking metaphorically when I use the term.

Submitted by Murphy1844 at 2010-12-08 13:16:15 EST (#)
Rating: 0

sage104:

You and me let's bring this place up to the level where it used to be. Do we have a deal?

Murphy

Submitted by Sage at 2010-12-08 13:09:23 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Also...just as an aside...if the question were "would you rather spend time with a Christian or homosexual?" my answer would remain the same: homosexual.

Submitted by Sage at 2010-12-08 13:02:30 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Oh my! (Wizard of Oz and all that...)

Seriously though, after reading your post...you're gay, and you'd rather spend time with an atheist than a fellow homosexual? Another gay person (be they male or female) would likely be able to understand and/or relate to you, which could foster a sense of trust which could then allow you to allow them to "scratch the itch", to use your words.

I guess if I were answering the question you posed to yourself, I'd probably rather spend time with a homosexual. At least homosexuality and faith aren't mutually exclusive (although depending on the Christian you talk to they may as well be).

Sidebar: You seem to have a bit of a bone to pick with Christians. Let me point out that atheists and religious zealots are actually pretty similar. Both have faith...Christians have faith that there is a God; Atheists have faith that there is no God. Both are absolutely sure their belief systems are correct, and quickly dismiss the idea that they are incorrect (and sometimes, the people who suggest such ideas). Both feel sorry for those that do not share their views, and believe those whose beliefs oppose theirs are wasting their lives believing the wrong thing. Both go to great lengths attempting to "prove" their faith.

Christians do take it a step further and judge fellow Christians along with non-believers...Christ called these people Pharisees. I have known many a Pharisee in my day; they suck, and I'm not one of them. Just so you know, and/or to put it analogically... Rectangle : Square : :: Christian : Pharisee

Shit, this coulda been it's own post...sorry about the length.

I just ate two incredible mini-cupcakes from Two Sweet Gourmet Cupcakes that our auditors brought in...mmmmm! Thanks, Deloitte!

POINTS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Submitted by FALLEN at 2010-12-08 11:30:32 EST (#)
Rating: 0

ya think?

Submitted by Murphy1844 at 2010-12-08 11:25:52 EST (#)
Rating: 0

This place has gone downhill.

Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB at 2010-12-08 10:55:19 EST (#)
Rating: -2

You used to be cool...until every thing that you started posting on here was about sucking some other dude's cock.

We get it. You're gay. We don't care really.

Submitted by Psygns_of_the_Tymes at 2010-12-08 10:03:20 EST (#)
Rating: 2

yeah ya bummer!

Submitted by TuTs at 2010-12-08 09:57:46 EST (#)
Rating: 2

You know what? If you would just stop being a fucking homo this wouldn't be a problem would it? Now feck off before you give us all teh ghey aids.

Submitted by YourNameHere at 2010-12-08 08:54:09 EST (#)
Rating: 2

fag above

Submitted by FALLEN at 2010-12-08 07:58:43 EST (#)
Rating: 0

atheists are great for a debate/argument. I usually take the opposing side just to work them into a frenzy. Honestly I dont care what another person believs or doesn't.
but once your conversation gets over the religion thing, what else do you got?
is this person interesting? got a cool job? an asshole?
they become just like any other person then.
i guess the same holds true for the homo, but you have the chance at possible drunk sex, assuming the guy dosen't think you were good looking enough to bang in the first place.
are you supposed to be flattered?
I mean even if you weren't into it
and what do you tell your buddies the next day? do you tell them?
is it not gay for you because he's gay?
would you rationalize it like you loaned a buddy your car and he brought it back full of gas.
you just loaned your buddy your cock and in exchange, you got off. win win right?
"Naw I'm not gay, but Bruce needed to suck a dick and mine was just laying around so I let him borrow it."
that a true friend right there.

Submitted by Psygns_of_the_Tymes at 2010-12-08 07:29:51 EST (#)
Rating: -1

Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2010-12-08 10:20:01 GMT (#)
Ranking: -1

If this was serious then I wonder how you manage to be so ignorant.

If this was not serious then I wonder how you manage to be so unentertaining.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2010-12-08 06:34:54 EST (#)
Rating: 1

Coleslaw?

Submitted by RoadSong at 2010-12-08 06:29:50 EST (#)
Rating: 1

"I’d prefer the company of reasonable people, unless of course they looked like Mr. Harris or Ryan Phillipe or James Franco."
~~~
You came back here to be in the company of REASONABLE people????
AHhAaaHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhaaaaaaahhhhaaaaaaahhhhhaaaaahaaaafuk

Please excuse my rude behavior. It was one too many brandy soaked fruit cakes.
{nothing personal I assure you}

You DID make me smile! :}

Submitted by ridiculous at 2010-12-08 06:25:27 EST (#)
Rating: -2

I was going to cut this post all to ribbons and make an amusing, out of context, quotation from it. But, there wasn't enough amusing content, either in or out of context! I wasted five minutes of my lunch realizing there was nothing I could refine from this pile of steaming feculence that would justify the effort expended to refine it.

-2...

May GOD have mercy on your soul.

P.S.
I didn't read this.

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2010-12-08 05:20:01 EST (#)
Rating: -1

If this was serious then I wonder how you manage to be so ignorant.

If this was not serious then I wonder how you manage to be so unentertaining.

Submitted by asmasta808 at 2010-12-08 05:15:30 EST (#)
Rating: -2

neither... nor... no

i would call myself an atheist if every openly athy guy i've met wasn't an asshole or a dumb webwhore blonde. same thing goes for the homos. and i hate drunks. especially those who can't hold their drink. assholes leave a smelly mess.



Marge, there's just too much pressure, what with my job, the kids, traffic
snarls, political strife at home and abroad. But I promise you, the second
all of those things go away, we'll have sex.

-- Homer Simpson
Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy