Pep Rally Bloodbath At Cannibal Camp part 2 (600 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 2 on 12 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Barny (Banging by the Book) Meinhoff (View user info) at 2007-01-30 09:33:29 EST
http://www.ubersite.com/m/97958 (part 1)
Part 2.
Chapter Five - What's that floating in the water?
Robert Plant tossed his mass of long curly hair back from his eyes before stooping towards the dais and blowing softly into the mike.
"One Two....is this on?" He smirked and thought back to his days touring with the zep, Gigs, groupies, Crowley, Drugs....madness and yet here he was for the third year running babysitting the snot nosed brats at camp Lazarus.
This time was different in that he had been made head councilor which as far as he was concerned just meant more work and less fun.
"Fucking shambles," He muttered under his breath. Unfortunately he was still near the microphone and his personal mantra of despair as shared with the other forty or so people in the room. Laughter ricochets around the room like flubber.
Oprah fixed him with a look of death and Montel who was sat cross legged on the floor with the juniors waited until Plants eyes stopped on him before clearly mouthing the word "Chief."
This time Robert kept his thoughts to himself as he stepped down from the stage past Oprah and towards his seat with the other councilors.
Had him mind been aped the room would have learnt exactly what Plant had planned for "That Cunt." Montel on the following days hike and camp out.
"Showtime!" Oprah thought to herself as she stuck on her million dollar smirking smile and stepped up to the podium.
Most of the kid's were regulars but there were a few new faces amongst the crowd, some she recognised from different studios and channels and some she did not. She had already had a run in with two of the new ones on the coach up here.
She had caught Red Rat and the pre war Elvis doing bumps of coke off the Aguilera girl's tits in the back of the bus and if it wasn't for red rat quickly offering here a gentleman's sized line of gear she would have sent them packing back home.
Most of the rest of them were unknown apart from that fat cunt from Everscene and the made up faggot from My Chemical Romance who she had definitely seen checking out the arses of some of the younger boys.
She cleared her throat.
"I would like to welcome you all to the start of what I know is going to be a beautiful and ultimately fun summer."
There was a scream from the back of the hall by the door,
Looking up she saw Shakira and instantly cursed, assuming that this was the girls trying to show her up for a cunt again, she gaped as she saw the Brazillian stumble in holding a ragged hole where her left tit had once lived, blood practically pissing between her fingers as she fell to her knees.
A two way tide of pandemonium erupted in the hall, cries and screams mounting as the kids shot in different directions either towards the crumpled form of the Brazilian erotic dancer or away from the spreading pool of blood.
Parting the rabble as they went like a trio of modern day Mosi's Oprah, Rob and Ricky Lake swept towards the prone body.
Ricky was the head first aider in camp and she rolled Shakira over to inspect the damage.
There was a hole in her chest the size of a dinner plait, Ragged flaps of skin and fatty tissue outlined gore covered white ribs where there had once been a breast both small, humble and in no way possible to mistake for big mountain.
Ricky stared at the frankly fucking awful wound and giggled as she thought about the gauze pads in the first aid kit. She thought she would as well try to stop the hole up with a kind word and a makeover.
Oprah propped Shakiras head up on her lap and gently slapped her back into consciousness.
"What happened sweetheart, who did this to you?"
Shakira fixed her with glazed and fading eyes.
"There's someone in the water."
And then she died.
User Reviews
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-01-31 10:35:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I fucking hate shakira.
Submitted by Zebra (user info) at 2007-01-30 18:03:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-01-30 16:01:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
mmm... plant...
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-01-30 15:11:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
it's Ricki Lake, btw
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-01-30 13:49:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-01-30 11:57:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this is a wonderful series.
hollywood pyscho wrote some shit (not too similar, but this reminds me of it for some reason) that i liked in the same manner
Submitted by swimmingbirdblue (user info) at 2007-01-30 11:26:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Haven't read it yet but I liked the previous two. Have a 2!
Submitted by Talibandrew (user info) at 2007-01-30 11:13:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
brilliant
Submitted by DirtyHarry (user info) at 2007-01-30 10:38:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"I'll give them blood and they will love me for it."
Submitted by orph (user info) at 2007-01-30 10:25:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-01-30 09:51:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ACE
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-01-30 09:44:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
DESTROY YOUR ENEMIES
WADE IN GORE
You will write much of this series and I will love it.