A bored intellect. (737 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.47 on 33 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Fey (View user info) at 2007-01-28 09:53:48 EST
I'm smarter than you'd like to think, because for some reason others' intelligence is a threat.
I happened upon ubersite while researching a paper. The submission was a well-written piece of mindmasturbation about time spent at a laundromat. I moved on to a piece about getting a haircut. It intrigued me, so I reconnoitered, got a feel for the bitterness of the place, and decided that it felt like home.
The people who made an impact reminded me of the group of monkeys, the sims chosen by a gang of children, in one of the Otherland books. Reckless, cynical, too smart for their own good. Of course, I wouldn't want to give the impression that you all impressed. I noticed the wankers. Call it a sixth sense if you will, but I've always been good at knowing right off the bat who will bug me.
I designed a submission of my own, a fairly straight up confession on my view of humanity. The responses ranged from scathing to imbecilic. But you were entertaining.
But you all missed the point, while dancing to the tune of my devising. I wanted to provoke. I enjoyed the aftermath. And you misunderstood. My reference to the japanese slightly fermented rice beverage was in no way a declaration that I didn't care. Of course I care. If I didn't, I wouldn't be here at all.
User Reviews
Submitted by InkyFingers (user info) at 2008-08-15 01:37:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Get off my coattails, Sphagnum.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-08-15 01:25:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm intrigued by you at the moment.
Keep it up (That's what she said)
Submitted by InkyFingers (user info) at 2008-08-15 01:14:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The people here are only as smart as you let them think they are. That's the trick. But someone as smart as you surely knew that.
Cookie?
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-27 11:58:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Another day bored...and today, you shall be my victim.
Ignore the multisyllabicly challenged below. Keep doing what you do.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2007-07-23 22:35:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-04-29 12:18:00 PDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And also, which bits read like they were put through a thesarus? There's nothing in this piece that is particularly complex.
========
Your posts better be dominantly monosyllabic from this point on.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-05-10 20:32:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
User Reviews
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-04-29 15:18:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And also, which bits read like they were put through a thesarus? There's nothing in this piece that is particularly complex.
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"reconnoitered" = Thesaurusesque.
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-04-29 15:18:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And also, which bits read like they were put through a thesarus? There's nothing in this piece that is particularly complex.
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-04-29 15:14:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ampersand - Some of us actually have (gasp, shock, horror) a vocabulary. So bite me.
Submitted by ampersand (user info) at 2007-04-13 21:06:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'll let you in on a secret, using an online thesarus to spiff up your post doesn't make you intelligent. It makes you odd and mildly pitiable.
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2007-02-01 16:06:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
NEO, THERE IS NO SPOON!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-02-01 15:31:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
what is the meaning of life?
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-01 15:30:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I will give you some friendly advice - you are here to entertain us, not the other way around.
Submitted by Falafel (user info) at 2007-01-28 15:59:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-01-28 15:46:24 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:09:33 (#)
Ranking: 0
I barely skimmed your first post and read none of the comments. People swagger onto uber declaring their contempt for it and for us (as if thousands of people can be represented by one internet profile), and then follow that up with a smug declaration that it was all for their own amusement EVERY FUCKING WEEK. If you've spent any amount of time here, you already know you are one of thousands making a desperate and trasparent attempt at garnering attention for yourself. And good on ya, because you'll find it here. We're ALL here for our own amusement. Congratulations on your predictability and mediocrity.
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<B
(...you get yer very own symbol now!)
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Haha it looks like an ice cream cone with two scoops side by side. I shall dub it ass cream.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-01-28 15:46:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:09:33 (#)
Ranking: 0
I barely skimmed your first post and read none of the comments. People swagger onto uber declaring their contempt for it and for us (as if thousands of people can be represented by one internet profile), and then follow that up with a smug declaration that it was all for their own amusement EVERY FUCKING WEEK. If you've spent any amount of time here, you already know you are one of thousands making a desperate and trasparent attempt at garnering attention for yourself. And good on ya, because you'll find it here. We're ALL here for our own amusement. Congratulations on your predictability and mediocrity.
---
<B
(...you get yer very own symbol now!)
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-01-28 15:37:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You warm the cockles of my heart... maybe below the cockles, maybe in the sub-cockle area. Maybe in the liver. Maybe in the kidneys. Maybe even in the colon, I don't know.
Either way, your brain makes me happy.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2007-01-28 15:25:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-01-28 11:15:07 (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't have time to leave anything intelligent, so I'll just drop a -2 and be on my way.
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2007-01-28 15:06:30 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Wow, this was all edgy and existential. Sorta like you just watched a few minutes of "Dennis Miller Live" and wrote what he said. Unlike Dennis Miller, you have no fucking clue what you are saying, but like to try to sound smart for strangers on the internet.
So, congrats on being another random loser on the information super highway who thinks they Have something to say. In reality, you aren't anybody to anyone. Don't get me wrong, neither am I, but I don't try to hide it. I'll leave you with the wisest words ever uttered by man:
"All I really know is that I don't know nothing" - Operation Ivy
"That's the whole trouble. You can't ever find a place that's nice and peaceful, because there isn't any. You may think there is, but once you get there, when you're not looking, somebody'll sneak up and write "Fuck you" right under your nose." - J.D. Salinger
"Suck my cock, you fucking homo." - Shlongy
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2007-01-28 14:20:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
one day you'll look back on this and laugh
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2007-01-28 14:08:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
your heart has a penis?
Submitted by TheDivider (user info) at 2007-01-28 13:49:32 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Worthless.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-01-28 13:05:05 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I always try to be entertaining when I tell dorks like you to "shut the fuck up" and "kill yourself".
I'm a regular laugh riot.
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2007-01-28 11:28:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
So the ability to use a thesaurus is now the way to determine intelligence?
Brilliant, you truly have taught us all a lesson. I, for one, am grateful.
No, really...
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-01-28 11:15:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't have time to leave anything intelligent, so I'll just drop a -2 and be on my way.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:56:10 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This was only marginally worse than your first post.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:50:15 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Oh, and just in case: stfu, alter.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:48:16 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
For anyone that might actually be interested in what you have to say once all the defensive intellectually masturbatory bullshit has been stripped away, this schtick is already old. However, if it is amusing you, then you could keep going this route. You'll probably get attention from people with nothing better to do who get pumped up by "owning" random internet idiots.
Submitted by Antioxident (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:32:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:28:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Yawn.
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:14:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This was really good. I look forward to more posts by you.
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:13:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
thanks, sacrilicious. you warm me deep into the cockles of my heart.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:09:36 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:09:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I barely skimmed your first post and read none of the comments. People swagger onto uber declaring their contempt for it and for us (as if thousands of people can be represented by one internet profile), and then follow that up with a smug declaration that it was all for their own amusement EVERY FUCKING WEEK. If you've spent any amount of time here, you already know you are one of thousands making a desperate and trasparent attempt at garnering attention for yourself. And good on ya, because you'll find it here. We're ALL here for our own amusement. Congratulations on your predictability and mediocrity.
Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:04:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Good to hear that.