I Only Like Going Clubbing If People Literally Are Getting Clubbed (2465 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.69 on 89 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Pentameter (View user info) at 2006-11-13 12:35:59 EST
Years ago, when I was actually still fooling myself into believing that it was fun to go out to nightclubs and drink, I happened to make friends with a very interesting bouncer at one of the local hotspots.
To this day, I have no idea what his name is, but I affectionately called him "Big Head," well, because the guy had a big fucking head. He shaved it bald and had weird tribal tattoos that sprouted from his neck, covering his entire braincase. As if that wasn't creepy enough, he was a blonde, so his light eyebrows didn't do much to give his face any definition whatsoever. Most of the time, his big blue eyes and white teeth looked as though they were floating above his mountainous body.
For some reason, if a guy is an ex-football player, or is generally large and/or mean looking, they're automatically going to fall in love with me. I haven't been able to pinpoint the reason for this reoccurring phenomenon. What I have learned is that sometimes, this isn't really a bad thing.
I quickly became Big Head's little cupcake. Once we became friendly, I didn't pay one cover charge or for one drink. If I ran out of cigarettes, he punched the machine until a pack came out so that I didn't have to spend a dime.
Not only did Big Head save me a lot of money, he also saved me a ton of aggravation. If any of the local douches started getting a little too touchy-feely, he would quickly come to my aid, taking them into the back room and beating them until they swore they'd never come back again. I head stories about heads getting flushed in toilets, but I was never able to confirm this and of course, he didn't "Beat and Tell."
Big Head is one of the nicest, most considerate and compassionate human beings I have ever met in my entire life...but he did have an Achilles Heal.
He hated glow sticks. And lots of kids brought glow sticks to the dance club.
From the shadows, I'd watch him pat people down. Whenever he found a person with a glow stick, he would scowl. Some kids wore their necklaces inside and waited to snap them until they got on the dancefloor. Some kids went crazy and taped glow necklaces to their arms and legs, so that as they gyrated on the floor, anyone could what moves they were busting out.
Yes. Yes they did.
And it didn't lay well with Big Head.
On one particular evening, a young guy came to the door dressed in all black and completely covered in glow necklaces. Big Head looked at him and laughed a little, patted him down, took his money and let him into the club. Crazy glow boy immediately whipped multiple glow sticks out of his pockets and began waving them around as he hit the floor.
"I'm pretty sure that guy is high," I said to Big Head.
Big Head looked at me with crazy eyes and said, "He's gonna be something by the time I'm done with him."
About two hours later, there was a change in the guard. Big Head went into the club and one of the other bouncers went out to the door. Obviously, it wasn't hard to spot the freak with the glow sticks, and Big Head honed in on him immediately.
He tapped the little freak on the shoulder and said, "Stop bumping into people or you're going to have to leave."
The kid turned around and said, "Fuck off, dickhead."
"Next time, I'm going to bury you," Big Head said.
The kid moved his head back and forth and went back to dancing, but as Big Head was turning around, some girl shouted, "Stop touching me, asshole!"
And that was all he needed.
What's funnier than seeing a kid covered in glow sticks getting punched in the side of the head?
In my opinion, absolutely nothing.
Big Head crumbled him up as though he were a piece of paper. Within seconds, the glow stick kid was crying and had snot spraying out of his nose. Big Head picked him up by the back of his shirt and carried him outside, where he threw him on the ground.
I snuck up to the doors and peeked through the crack.
"Why? Why did you do this to me?" the kid sobbed, his black eyeliner running down his cheeks.
"I'll tell you why...because I fucking hate you."
Big Head then went into the little vestibule by the doorway and pulled out a box of confiscated glow sticks, which he dumped over the little freak's head.
He walked back into the club, the glorious victor in the battle for a glow stick free world. The music kept playing and hundreds of kids waved their glow sticks in remembrance. Soon after that incident, the number of kids who used to proudly snap their glow sticks and wave them as they danced began to dwindle.
It is my belief that this man saved us all from damnation, that he saved us from ravers and losers and kids who thought they were cool. As I was grocery shopping yesterday, I saw him with his elderly mother, gently holding her elbow as she pushed her cart down the aisle. I considered walking up to him and saying hello, but when I saw him cold cock his mother for dropping a can of peaches in heavy syrup, I said to myself, "That's my Big Head," and hurried out of the store.
User Reviews
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2008-09-17 16:46:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-08-05 13:56:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Why? Why did you do this to me?" the kid sobbed, his black eyeliner running down his cheeks.
"I'll tell you why...because I fucking hate you."
Submitted by Gay (user info) at 2008-08-05 12:31:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That wasn't very nice. Have a great day!
Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2007-11-09 03:09:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I wonder if you still check this. I should just post my phone number here and see how long it takes for you to call me.
Submitted by Alter (user info) at 2007-09-26 21:04:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No, Comment.
Submitted by TechnoRatty (user info) at 2007-05-15 14:45:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Honey, you rock!!
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-02-23 09:30:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love you.
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2007-02-23 09:12:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Where you been, Mrs. Donkey?
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2007-01-23 18:53:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 just for "Next time I'll fucking bury you"
I hate glowsticks, and strobelights, and ecstasy.
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2006-11-24 21:26:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Woo hoo! I hate gay raver club going dweebs.
Submitted by Ejryuu (user info) at 2006-11-21 15:46:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Why anyone would mess with a bouncer is beyond me. Their sole job description is to fuck people up.
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2006-11-15 11:23:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHA! Doofy rave-kids, I love it!
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-11-15 02:53:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Dance.
Dance.
Everybody look at your pants.
Submitted by VelvetElvis (user info) at 2006-11-15 02:20:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Reminds me of the devil-may-care old Pent. This warmed my heart in all its dark declivities- I'd like to return the favor. And will, when time allows for a post.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2006-11-14 20:53:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
is big head me?
btw, i'm a large ex football player and i didn't fall in love with you.
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2006-11-14 20:50:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
that's fucking funny
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2006-11-14 14:16:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2006-11-14 10:10:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
I want to be on you.
hahahahaha
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-14 13:58:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Thank you Mr Bighead.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2006-11-14 10:11:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I met a girl called Cupcake this weekend.
Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2006-11-14 10:10:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I want to be on you.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-11-14 09:59:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Now that's a fucking great thought.
Submitted by Flying_buttmonkey (user info) at 2006-11-14 07:25:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My mate Benny Big Heed (<- not spelled incorrectly) suffers the same fate, it's like a beanbag resting on his shoulders.
+2 for asshole bouncers that are your friends. It's funny when they're being an asshole to other people.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-11-14 06:17:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
<3
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2006-11-14 04:32:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
excellent!
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2006-11-14 04:28:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well I've had that happen to me once, but like I said in the post, I deserved it.
Submitted by Timmaaaaah (user info) at 2006-11-14 04:03:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love a baseball, do you love a baseballs?
Submitted by phauna (user info) at 2006-11-13 23:33:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Bouncers are arseholes.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-13 22:48:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2006-11-13 20:12:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, they're all definitely braindead.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-11-13 20:09:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't forget roided up, pyscho, fat, cowardly and braindead, jeannneee.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:58:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have the same problem, except instead of big and footbally, the dudes that fall for me are all under 21 and Asian. Weird.
Submitted by Sinistral (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:46:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for the title alone.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:36:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Big head is a funny expression.
Submitted by Defect (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:18:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Big Head is one of the nicest, most considerate and compassionate human beings I have ever met in my entire life...
---
O RLY?
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:13:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:39:19 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2006-11-13 15:34:13 (#)
Ranking: -1
Didn't really like this story, could just be the mood i'm in, but usually your stuff is so entertaining that I once spent a solid hour reading it all, I just wish this one hadn't been so boring.
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Still very much worth the read though.
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I've seen better
Submitted by KindaNews (user info) at 2006-11-13 19:05:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2006-11-13 18:40:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I too have an enormous, oddly-shaped head, but Im always tilting it to the right, so it appears to be well-rounded.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2006-11-13 18:39:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
no me gusta bouncers
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-11-13 18:04:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I haven't been around much lately but nothing really has changed. You still rule.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:39:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2006-11-13 15:34:13 (#)
Ranking: -1
Didn't really like this story, could just be the mood i'm in, but usually your stuff is so entertaining that I once spent a solid hour reading it all, I just wish this one hadn't been so boring.
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Still very much worth the read though.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:20:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-13 15:07:20 (#)
Ranking: 2
nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts DANCE nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts HAVE FUN nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts DANCE nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts DRINK BEER nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE
Submitted by Kaelic (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:10:56 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Sounds like a reasonable, sane human being.
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:07:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Pluth Two
Submitted by extacy_red (user info) at 2006-11-13 17:05:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
/shrug
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2006-11-13 15:34:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Didn't really like this story, could just be the mood i'm in, but usually your stuff is so entertaining that I once spent a solid hour reading it all, I just wish this one hadn't been so boring.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2006-11-13 15:16:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I now love bighead.
Love him.
Submitted by jade_digitalmedia (user info) at 2006-11-13 15:15:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
*turns down diesel boy*
erm. yeah.
i fuckin hate twinkies!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-11-13 15:07:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts DANCE nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts HAVE FUN nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts DANCE nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts DRINK BEER nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts nts DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2006-11-13 15:03:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey Pent, you may actually not have a bye due to a course correction... the bracket got messed up... I'm not sure how it's going to shake down, but you should be aware you may not be getting a bye and make sure you pay attention.
Sorry.
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:58:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
We'll be stopping by.
**Still staring accusingly**
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:48:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:32:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
THAT LOOKS LIKE DARKO
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:41:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Holy fuck...I did make a lot of mistakes.
Sorry about that. I suck at multi-tasking.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:30:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, that Big Head.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:28:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Beating up a raver queen is ALWAYS in good taste.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:21:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
For the title alone.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:20:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:01:27 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:56:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
I am big and scary looking. Do I have to develop a crush on you? Because I will, you know, if you want me too.
Hey Dan - lets stop and see her on the road trip.
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Yeah, you can visit Donkey and I in our ass-kicking abode.
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Notice how nicely Luci just said "BACKOFF ASSHOLE I HAVE A BOYFRIEND"
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:17:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
oops - see if you can decipher that one
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:16:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
amug
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:09:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by garudave (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:07:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The part about cold-cocking old people was the best.
Submitted by Newty (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:01:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this was hilarious, even though i kinda feel sorry for the poor lil queen in the eye liner
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-11-13 14:01:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:56:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
I am big and scary looking. Do I have to develop a crush on you? Because I will, you know, if you want me too.
Hey Dan - lets stop and see her on the road trip.
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Yeah, you can visit Donkey and I in our ass-kicking abode.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:56:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am big and scary looking. Do I have to develop a crush on you? Because I will, you know, if you want me too.
Hey Dan - lets stop and see her on the road trip.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:54:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Big Head is one of the nicest, most considerate and compassionate human beings I have ever met in my entire life..."""
why thanks!
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:51:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
nice
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:48:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:46:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:26:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
This had enough errors in it to be a Donkey Post...
*stares accusingly**
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STARE AT THIS, BITCH!
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:44:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have a few Big Heads in my life. Good guys and big softies but can and will eat the face off of any little punks who cross their paths.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:41:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:14:22 (#)
Ranking: 2
I also hate glow sticks and people who use them. This was also well written, hence the +2.
Now will you please clarify something that confuses me? Please explain to me how a guy who beats the crap out of other people is one of the nicest, most considerate and compassionate human beings? Isn't beating the crap out of them the exact opposite of nice, considerate, and compassionate?
PS - Do not give scourge your phone number. He will paste it in every bathroom he sees. I had to change my number.
=================
Like I said, the guy just had this unbelieveable hatred toward glow sticks and the people who used them. He was generally a very nice person, and most people who knew him thought he was a sweetie. Glow sticks made him wig the fuck out.
And don't worry, my phone number is already in every bathroom.
I mean.
Nevermind.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:36:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What's funnier than seeing a kid covered in glow sticks getting punched in the side of the head?
In my opinion, absolutely nothing. """
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:35:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:32:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
THAT LOOKS LIKE DARKO
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:26:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This had enough errors in it to be a Donkey Post...
*stares accusingly**
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:21:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:19:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate glowsticks. I hate people who like to dance with glowsticks. I hate people who don't hate people who like to dance with glowsticks.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:16:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate E-tards.
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:15:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Now in Crumple-vision.
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:14:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I also hate glow sticks and people who use them. This was also well written, hence the +2.
Now will you please clarify something that confuses me? Please explain to me how a guy who beats the crap out of other people is one of the nicest, most considerate and compassionate human beings? Isn't beating the crap out of them the exact opposite of nice, considerate, and compassionate?
PS - Do not give scourge your phone number. He will paste it in every bathroom he sees. I had to change my number.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:11:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Big Head crumbled him up"
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the word of the day is "crumpled".
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-11-13 13:05:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I can honestly say that I can count on one hand how many times that I've been to a club in my life.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-11-13 12:57:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-11-13 12:45:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice. Are there any more tales of Big Head?
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There are a few, but most of them mirror this one. When I saw him gorcery shopping yesterday, I thought of this and haven't stopped laughing since.
Crystle - Thank you.
Hadley - That's pretty funny...well done on corrupting her.
scourge - I internet admire you too.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-13 12:52:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i internet admire you
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2006-11-13 12:51:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm rubbing off on my mother. One of her (much) younger coworkers made a comment about going clubbing. She asked "That doesn't involve baby seals, does it?"
My mom rules.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-13 12:50:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
uh - in the interest of making sure that comes out right...
decode to mean:
"I appreciate the fact that you aren't a teen"
and I am very sincere in this.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-11-13 12:49:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
yeah for being over teen angst!
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2006-11-13 12:46:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by thesushiking (user info) at 2006-11-13 12:45:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What a great climax : "because I hate you"
hahahaahahahahahaha
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-11-13 12:45:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice. Are there any more tales of Big Head?
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2006-11-13 12:38:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Someone tried to give me a 'glowstick' show in a club called Orion once. They ended up hitting me in the face. It sucked.