The Old Hill Motel (636 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: Serious
Rating: 2 on 13 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by LSD 420 <lsd4444.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2006-05-18 23:07:16 EDT
The pack of cards fell to the ground and the ace got turned to ice
Its so cold and there aint a car rolling out on the road tonight
The Old Hill Motel came into view and I began to cry
I'd found the place I was dreaming of where I could warm and dry
The old man that runs the place keeps a mean watch dog
Got three front legs, all sharp teeth, got horseshoes on his paws
"Hey get out you fuckin bum" the owner cursed at me
"It's a cold night and I've been out for miles" I said in disbelief
"Don't matter to me 'cause time is money and money is the root of all cash
And if I ever wanna get outta this dump, it'll cost you to sit on your ass"
I walked outside and slammed the door and thought he was a prick
But he was inside and I was dyin' a freezing death out on the short end o' the stick
The wind still flew like a thousand knives straight from foreign lands
And the hail and snow and rain got together and jointly froze my hands
I had a bag of books but they all turned to shit
As the rain and hail and sleet and snow kept on pushin it
I dropped the bag in the freezing mud and focused on my guitar
I hiked it up sideways, cursed a bit, and waited for a car
I was ten feet from warmth a miser sells and ten feet in the cold
The fat man just counted his bills and laughed til his jelly rolled
"You fuck" I whispered under my breath through dry and cracking lips
I hated him more and more when I found I had to piss
I stood in the same damn clothes that suited me for years
A braver man but more stupid for wearin em out here
Cowboy boots and jacket, and ripped up blue jeans
The uniform of fucking bums or so it fucking seemed
I took a step forwards at the Old Hill Motel gate
The old fucker watching guard for his precious place
I took another step and then two or three more
Until god damnit look at me I was standing at the door
I imagined gory scenes of revenge in the lonely night
The fucker probably had no friends and god knows he couldn't fight
I imagined blowin' his brains out, all over the tiled floor
I imagined screwin' his wife beside his corpse and so much more
I burst down the door and I punched him in the face
He reached for the phone but I ripped it away, he was gonna pay
Gimme a room or gimme yer ass I pushed in his fat face
He said "What, you gonna kill me, good luck coverin every trace"
I picked picked up a pen and stabbed his eye and screamed "how's this?"
He just screamed and yelled and cried - what a shit
I did something next that would make a grown man cry
And it did by god, so I think I won't describe
He slumped over in his chair and I reached and took a key
I was going to enjoy my night of luxury
So now when people ask me why I think I'm goin' to hell
I just say I killed a man at the Old Hill Motel
User Reviews
Submitted by JohnnyTruant (user info) at 2007-02-02 10:38:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is one of my favourites
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2006-05-26 04:27:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by georgemichael (user info) at 2006-05-26 04:14:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
LSD WTF has come over you?
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2006-05-26 04:02:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Whiplash (user info) at 2006-05-25 21:33:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by LSD420 (user info) at 2006-05-22 13:57:13 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-22 10:53:59 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by supadupapupa (user info) at 2006-05-18 23:29:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
possibly the next orgasmatron?
---
The next Orgasmatron is already on the way. Feety Orgasmatron.
---
Haha, I loved that one. Make more about Feety!
----
please fucking don't
Fetus jokes are to funny as Da Vinci Code is to well written novels
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
No wonder they're so well received by Uber...
Submitted by Whiplash (user info) at 2006-05-25 21:33:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by LSD420 (user info) at 2006-05-22 13:57:13 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-22 10:53:59 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by supadupapupa (user info) at 2006-05-18 23:29:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
possibly the next orgasmatron?
---
The next Orgasmatron is already on the way. Feety Orgasmatron.
---
Haha, I loved that one. Make more about Feety!
----
please fucking don't
Fetus jokes are to funny as Da Vinci Code is to well written novels
Submitted by LSD420 (user info) at 2006-05-22 13:57:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-22 10:53:59 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by supadupapupa (user info) at 2006-05-18 23:29:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
possibly the next orgasmatron?
---
The next Orgasmatron is already on the way. Feety Orgasmatron.
---
Haha, I loved that one. Make more about Feety!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-22 10:53:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by supadupapupa (user info) at 2006-05-18 23:29:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
possibly the next orgasmatron?
---
The next Orgasmatron is already on the way. Feety Orgasmatron.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-05-19 18:54:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome shit, my man. . .
Submitted by LSD420 (user info) at 2006-05-19 16:29:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha, you always rate my shit right as I get in the door
+2 to you guys
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-05-19 16:10:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Holy shit LSD! That was really fucken good. It was serious too! I think im getting a little veclemped(sp?).
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2006-05-19 05:28:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-18 23:59:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by supadupapupa (user info) at 2006-05-18 23:29:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
possibly the next orgasmatron?
========
There is only one Orgasmatron.
But if you really did write this, here's a +2 from me. It's an improvement on your other posts by leaps and bounds.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-05-18 23:59:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by supadupapupa (user info) at 2006-05-18 23:29:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
possibly the next orgasmatron?
========
There is only one Orgasmatron.
But if you really did write this, here's a +2 from me. It's an improvement on your other posts by leaps and bounds.
Submitted by supadupapupa (user info) at 2006-05-18 23:29:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
possibly the next orgasmatron?