Ubercaption- Jessica Alba Style #9, Only one thing to do on a Friday like this... (2590 hits)
Category: GraphicsRating: 1.27 on 73 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by S R (View user info) at 2006-05-12 10:36:56 EDT
-Hey Ess-arr?
-Yo what's up?
-Why do you post Jessica Alba all the time?
-Cause I'm Bored... and I like looking at her ass.
-OK, but don't you think these caption contests are getting lame?
-Sure, it was lame when I did the first one, but it kills a good part of my day and today is a real
wank Friday, it's raining and when I'm done work here, I have to go to work until 3am.
-I see, well can I play then?
-Sure all you have to do is captionize the picture, you make me laugh out loud I'll +2 one of your posts and if you make me smirk you'll get a +1 on a <1 post.
-That sounds fun!
-It is, plus if you go back to my old Alba's you can win + 2's there too.
-but what about all those people that don't care about ratings and think this is all absurd.
-They are lying everyone cares about ratings. Why do you think I post Alba?
-Because you're a hitwhore?
-I'd like to say yes but I've been here for almost two years and just the other day broke the 100K, so no I'm not much of a hitwhore.
-Do you feel special?
-yes I do........ no I don't.
-you look sad.
-I am
*hugs all around*
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Previous Contests Alba Style:
#8 http://www.ubersite.com/m/85046
#7 http://www.ubersite.com/m/81952
#6 http://www.ubersite.com/m/70767
#5 http://www.ubersite.com/m/68512
#4-http://www.ubersite.com/m/65146
#3-http://www.ubersite.com/m/62967
#2-http://www.ubersite.com/m/54928
#1-http://www.ubersite.com/m/39780
As always my lame ass attempt:
Alba: They didn't call me Honey for no reason, come have a taste sweety.
User Reviews
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2006-05-14 00:48:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The caption is not important.
What is important is how did that pud with a hat be so lucky to corn hole JA?
Auto +2 for shiney ass cheeks.
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2006-05-13 00:41:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
She is TOTALLY saying, "So I was watching this porno, right? And these two chicks, they were sitting like this, right...?" She is confused. She doesn't know what color she is. She wants to be raped, but she knows its wrong and I know its illegal. It hasn't stopped me before, but she's a celebrity.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2006-05-13 00:14:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'd like everyone to know that ess arr is a man of his word. +2 received.
Oh, and I liked the 'nail that lifeguard in the back of the head' quote that somebody did, too. Good show, whoever you are.
Submitted by CookieLass (user info) at 2006-05-12 23:05:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:55:37 (#)
Ranking: 0
CRAM IT IN MY CRAM HOLE LAFLUER!
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PWESOME!!
*curlytoedshoes!*
Submitted by eppliks (user info) at 2006-05-12 19:13:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wanna sodomy her
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2006-05-12 18:43:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm an ass man.
Submitted by FatTony (user info) at 2006-05-12 17:02:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This is how Fat Tony had me on all fours and then I said 'Baby I'm close'. I never seen him after that.
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2006-05-12 16:40:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"Want to see why they call me 'nutcracker'?"
Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2006-05-12 16:29:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sideburns..........is that you??????
Submitted by sublime (user info) at 2006-05-12 16:22:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
the wallet, in here, its where i hide all my valuables
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2006-05-12 15:45:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My proctologist is also a hypnotist. He told me that he makes think I'm a puppet, sticks his hand up my ass and puts on a little show for all the people with ass problems in the waiting room.
I could be mad at him for this. It makes feel like I'm helping out, though. Like really lifting people's spirits.
Everyone must do their part. My part involves having someone elbow deep in my asshole, lifting the spirits of forlorn asses.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-05-12 14:47:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's been rotating on the Uberboard - which, by the way, I cannot even fathom sending a dollar to bart to post ANYTHING on that Uberboard, and I have literally hundreds of thousands of dollars - for the last two days.
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-05-12 13:54:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-05-12 12:40:55 (#)
Ranking: 2
Really; Whomever wrote that "Urbane looks hot" - and it's PROBABLY her, because I can't envision anyone else...
1) Writing that
2) Thinking that
3) Giving a shit
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was that an entry cause it made me laugh...
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-05-12 13:53:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-05-12 13:51:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
spread your cheeks and get the butter. smack (+2 to anyone who can identify that obscure song quote).
---------
I prefer:
Spread your buns and get the butter. yum!
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-05-12 13:51:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
spread your cheeks and get the butter. smack (+2 to anyone who can identify that obscure song quote).
Submitted by MichelleNJ (user info) at 2006-05-12 13:51:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:59:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
'Quick! Get a match!'
--
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-05-12 13:39:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
avast mateys, prepare to board doggy-stylee!
Submitted by COMountain (user info) at 2006-05-12 13:10:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Hey - you're that guy that said he'd 'eat the corn in my poo,' right? Welpers... it's your lucky day. I got a turtlehead pokin'."
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2006-05-12 12:59:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I looked at my asshole the other day in the mirror. It blew my fucking mind!
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2006-05-12 12:47:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Ready? Aim...
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-05-12 12:40:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Really; Whomever wrote that "Urbane looks hot" - and it's PROBABLY her, because I can't envision anyone else...
1) Writing that
2) Thinking that
3) Giving a shit
...Needs his/her head examined. Then, they need to go kill themselves.
Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2006-05-12 12:31:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't have an entry for this contest. All I have is a raging hard-on.
Oh wait, I just read "I hate to admit it but urbane does look hot" on the uberboard. My penis has severed itself from my body.
Okay, how about "nah, this is just my favorite sun-tanning position." Wow, that sucks.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-05-12 12:23:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Chalk up another victory for Shlongy!
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-05-12 12:11:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
NO! I won't get naked in the movies or act whorrish, i want to be taken seriously. I'm classy. NOW WILL THE GODDAMN PAPARAZZI TAKE A PICTURE OF ME BENT OVER AND PUT IT IN MAGAZINES AND ALL OVER THE INTERNET! I'VE BEEN ON ALL FOURS FOR AN HOUR!
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2006-05-12 12:03:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
im so lazy that i never change my rating even on posts i like
except this time
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2006-05-12 12:03:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"OK, fine. But can I sell the enema bottle on eBay when we're done?"
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2006-05-12 12:03:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"stick some fireworks in my butt crack and gimme all your cigarettes"
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-05-12 12:01:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
this is the only way I feel safe...
Submitted by the_thorne (user info) at 2006-05-12 12:00:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Jessica: Ok I'm all set, now pass me a ping pong ball.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:59:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
oh this is a caption contest?
i was telling you to get me an iced tea...
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:58:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
- "Now, when I shoot footballs out of my snatch, I prefer this position. Now you try."
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:57:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"And then the Doctor did this D.R.E. thing"
Submitted by Leonfc (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:56:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jess: SHUT UP! Robert De Niro does it like, all the time for every movie! It's called Method acting
Dude: Jess, you're doing the voice of Lassie in a disney film. Stop being a cunt, come over here and let me lick your belly button from the inside.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:56:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
get me an iced tea bitch
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:55:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
CRAM IT IN MY CRAM HOLE LAFLUER!
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:54:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
badass, but there are so many options...
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:53:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Dude: Female ejaculation is total BS.
Jess: Five bucks says I can nail that life gaurd on the back of the head.
Submitted by ozzy (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:53:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Dude: Don't fucken point that thing at me! I got wind burn last time you ate a curry.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:51:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
SOMEONE SHOULD DO ONE ABOUT FUCKING HER ASS!
Submitted by sinna (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:45:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Jessica: "Is everyone looking yet?"
Submitted by NotSteve (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:44:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"So in that Brittany Spears sculpture, she was like, totally in this position giving birth and stuff..."
Submitted by ozzy (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:40:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Dude: <stunned silence>
Jessica: Well? This arse aint gonna fuck itself.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:35:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jess - "Yes, I know Fantastic Four was a horrible movie! Now shut up about that and ram your massive cock in my dirthole!"
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:24:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:19:17 (#)
Ranking: 0
FUCK MY ASS, puh-LEASE, Shlongy!
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Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:18:41 (#)
Ranking: 0
FUCK MY ASS!!!!!
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both winners!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:24:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:56:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
ill fucking kill you, O-Tron
---
Like you could hope to sneak up on me.
I'd hear the sounds of door frames creaking as your mammoth peanut head stretches them out.
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:24:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jessica: This is how your brother made me cum.
Random Dude: Do what now?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:19:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
FUCK MY ASS, puh-LEASE, Shlongy!
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:18:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
FUCK MY ASS!!!!!
Submitted by Hilarity_Ensues (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:16:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jessica: Oh gawd, stick it in my butt right now!
Random Dude: Right here on the beach in front of everyone? Okay!
Submitted by Leonfc (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:15:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
-Sure, it was lame when I did the first one, but it kills a good part of my day and today is a real
wank Friday, it's raining and when I'm done work here, I have to go to work until 3am
------------------------
Double +2 as I have to aswell :-(
Until 4am though....not fricking good
Submitted by Coleslaw_Murphy (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:15:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jess: "You wish you could see what I'm doing right now."
Dude: "Quit teasing, and give me my prescription sunglasses back."
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:15:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"This is how it used to go with Daddy?"
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:14:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jess: Dear I'll let you flip a coin, Heads you get the Bajiner and tails you get the pipe...
Submitted by Leonfc (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:13:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
woof!
Not now Jess
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:13:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
if you'd have stuck with
'yeah i suck at this'
you might have won or one or Obi One or Obi Won or something to that effect
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:09:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
do you think they can see my hemorrhoids from this angle?
yeah i suck at this...
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:01:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:59:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:41:05 (#)
Ranking: 0
How about, "The sun can turn us all into black people, but it can't do anything to beef up this narrow ass."
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winner.
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already got the 2...
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-05-12 11:01:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:59:03 (#)
Ranking: 2
'Quick! Get a match!'
BADABOOM!!!!
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:59:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:41:05 (#)
Ranking: 0
How about, "The sun can turn us all into black people, but it can't do anything to beef up this narrow ass."
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winner.
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:59:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
'Quick! Get a match!'
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:56:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ill fucking kill you, O-Tron
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:56:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jessica: I heard I was like, um, supposed to come here for the new TubGirl tryouts?
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:55:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Dude: Jess, what the hell did you eat for lunch? your bathing suit used to be white...
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:55:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"So is this how you were last night with Method, Mitch? Hmm?"
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:53:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jessica: I know its a big leg, but I think it'll fit
Random Chump: OK
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:49:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"The waiter didn't care that Deckchair and his girlfriend were panting furiously, or that timy people were sitting on their tongues."
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:49:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"wanna see my dark angel?"
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:48:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So I'm all like 'COME ON RIDE ME, DOG!'
and he's all like 'WOOF!'
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:46:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"this is what I want to do tonight, honey"
"umm, ok"
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:45:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.smithappens.com/video_albalapdance.php
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:41:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oops
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:41:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
How about, "The sun can turn us all into black people, but it can't do anything to beef up this narrow ass."
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2006-05-12 10:40:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Butt why?