Something else I hate... (797 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.33 on 22 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by IWalkOnPavement<im_such_a_jackass.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2006-04-12 21:02:41 EDT
'Wacky' people.
Those 'oh so funny' people who when filling out an 'About Me' section, maybe in a personal ad, write the following:
"Well, i'm a bit wacky, just ask my friends! I'm a friendly person, unless i've been out the night before!!! I get on with people, unless they try and take my chocolate!!! I like to go out and socialise, I enjoy the odd glass of wine, maybe too many glasses sometimes! I'm still a teenager at heart, I get on better with my kids friends than people my own age!"
Ok, just reading that back annoys me, lets take this one step at a time.
"Well, i'm a bit wacky, just ask my friends!"
No, you're not. You are probably about 37 and work in admin. Not only that, but calling yourself wacky is a sure fire way to prove that you are completely not wacky, you knob.
"I'm a friendly person, unless i've been out the night before!!!"
Oh, go out a lot do we? Go and get wasted? No, you don't. We all know that. Stop.
"I get on with people, unless they try and take my chocolate!!!"
I doubt that anyone has ever tried to take your chocolate. I wouldn't touch your mangy chocolate with a fucking bargepole.
"I like to go out and socialise, I enjoy the odd glass of wine, maybe too many glasses sometimes!"
We've covered this. You're a cock.
"I'm still a teenager at heart, I get on better with my kids friends than people my own age!"
I'll tell you one thing about that love. Your kids friends either hate or pity you. You choose which you prefer fuckface.
Then there is the word 'Random'.
Random, as defined by http://wordnet.princeton.edu:
- Lacking any definite plan or order or purpose; governed by or depending on chance; "a random choice"; "bombs fell at random"; "random movements".
- Taken haphazardly; "a random choice".
Random, as defined by 15 year old girls:
- Saying the word cheese a lot.
Random humour is great, don't get me wrong. It's is by far the easiest way to make me laugh. But please, don't be a twat and think that using the word cheese over and over is fucking funny, because it isn't.
I actually found the following phrase written on the whiteboard in my Philosophy classroom one day.
"einsteins theory - To much cheese makes you gay (Their spelling, not mine)"
Now, I don't know too much about Einstein, but i'm pretty sure he never said that.
User Reviews
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-08-13 17:32:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Do you teach Philosophy or take Philosophy?
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2006-04-15 18:50:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Testify!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-04-14 17:51:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2006-04-13 09:43:18 (#)
Ranking: 2
Well I'm about to turn lesbo anyday now, because I love me some cheese.
Submitted by leilani (user info) at 2006-04-13 11:56:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by ConorJS (user info) at 2006-04-12 21:18:19 (#)
Ranking: 1
Oh GOD! I fuckin' hated it when everyone thought that random was defined by jokes revolving around "cheese" or "cows" or "purple."
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i don't understand this.
Why haven't i heard the cheese/cows/purple jokes? Am I not WACKY enough!!??
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2006-04-13 09:43:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well I'm about to turn lesbo anyday now, because I love me some cheese.
Submitted by IWalkOnPavement (user info) at 2006-04-13 07:35:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
In fact, you can see the end of the word 'cheese' from another section in the top left corner.
Submitted by IWalkOnPavement (user info) at 2006-04-13 07:33:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Berty, thanks for the advice, i'm just learning and i'll bare it in mind. I just enjoy writing anger at the moment, so there might be a few more of that nature.
And no, I didn't write that on the board myself. In fact, it was covered in stuff that some annoying cocks had written about cheese, but I couldn't take a picture of the whole thing so I chose that one section of it.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-04-13 07:21:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Grimm (user info) at 2006-04-13 06:59:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-04-13 06:57:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Did someone actually write that, or did you just make the sentence up yourself as an example and then proceed to deconstruct it and make sarcastic comments?
That makes all the difference.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-04-13 06:49:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Being serious for just a moment, people on Uber do appreciate the darker side of life but that doesn't mean we're allergic to the good stuff. As long as a piece is well written, is engaging and is generally not God awful it will be recieved well.
Of course, you can write about whatever you want in any style you please. Indeed, you don't have to worry about what dingbats like me have to say at all and just vent. That is generally regarded as poor form though and people will start agressivly attacking your foibles simply to upset you and make you unhappy in your life. It's interesting really, like watching a live bear in a pit being eaten alive by rats.
So yeah, try and write for the audience if you can because that just makes Ubersite generally better.
Submitted by IWalkOnPavement (user info) at 2006-04-13 06:27:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If i'm going to be completely honest, a lot of the stuff I write I don't completely believe, or I beef up the anger a little. I agree with what you're saying, they are just vulnerable, but its no fun to write a nice story about how we should all look after one other. If I had done that, there would of been one hell of a lot more -2s.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2006-04-13 05:22:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Jesus dude, these are just people that, like, just don't want to be thought of as boring. They're probably very simple and harmonious people who have been compelled to just be extroverted in a sham-tastic way. I always think "shit man, the love of his life probably left him for some guy who was 'more interesting' and it broke the poor arsehole." Poor motherfucker probably lives for his kids and maybe he's married again not to be alone but you know he's just hollow, you know? You can see it in the way he looks out the window at the pigeons.
I don't get the hate. These people don't hurt anybody. All I see is some vulnerable dude and I just want to give him a hug, maybe some candy or some lucozade you know? Talk to him about his kids, make him feel special and important. 'Cause, you know, if you've got little people relying on you then you really are important, you know? We've all got to look after each other, like.
The theory of cheese cracked me up.
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-04-13 00:25:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for Einstein... I bet he thought that was damn funny...
Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2006-04-12 23:29:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wacky doglovers are even worse...
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-04-12 23:04:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"We've covered this, you're a cock."
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Hehehe.
Submitted by Tubabuhst_01 (user info) at 2006-04-12 22:53:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So that's why the ice cream didn't have any bones......
Submitted by EntityErased (user info) at 2006-04-12 22:07:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't think this way funny, but +2 because I agree.
Submitted by Ingsoc (user info) at 2006-04-12 21:41:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2006-04-12 21:26:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
bargepole
Submitted by ConorJS (user info) at 2006-04-12 21:18:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Oh GOD! I fuckin' hated it when everyone thought that random was defined by jokes revolving around "cheese" or "cows" or "purple."
It's just not random if everyone is saying it.
Submitted by extacy_red (user info) at 2006-04-12 21:07:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i hate those kind of people too.
yea.....