Does masturbation make me gay or an introvert? (980 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.37 on 15 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by <EAZEDZT.at.AOL.COM> (View user info) at 2005-12-09 13:48:03 EST
Come on I can't be the only one that has ever pontificated on this dilemna.
Caul?
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Masturbation used to be a taboo, something you didn't talk about. It was the eeeeevil and parents, clergy and Mr. Rogers shouted to the corners of the earth the side effects of self-pleasure.
You will;
- go blind
- get callouses
- break it (i thought I did once)
- shoot your eye out.
- etc.
Now in the 00's things have changed. Ugly people are on TV, cars have built-in maps , and masturbation is A O K! What with over population and AIDS it seems that it is THE choice of the times. All you have to do is pull the door close (advisable unless cops are part of your auto erotica), drop trou and begin.
But this brings me full circle to my original question. Sure it is a safe and cheap alternative to sex with a partner, this being no truer than during the holiday season, but...
User Reviews
Submitted by NewGuy08 (user info) at 2005-12-10 15:35:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't know what you were trying to do with this, but whatever it was didn't work, unless you were trying to post something shitty. In that case- horray!
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2005-12-10 09:36:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
somewhere in this was an attempt to be funny, I sense
Submitted by EAZEDZT (user info) at 2005-12-09 18:26:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The ghey image screwed this post almost as much as the shitty writing, eh?
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2005-12-09 16:35:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-09 16:06:43 (#)
Ranking: 1
She said:
When fingers last deploy in pink-thin folds,
Disappearing like so much hair from Donald Trump's dome,
I look down and see that I've become a leper,
For my digits, once more, have escaped me,
Fled to the shaved, flushed Egypt of my loins.
Rock now the boat, fingertips!
Stir the honeypot - my bee is in the bonnett!
Make me quiver like bowled jell-o resting on a fat man's fupa.
Wait - I feel a stirring in the force,
Double your efforts, Tarkin,
For Lazarus will rise again.
He said:
When grip takes hold and flexing hand attacks the root
Of my trunk, my branch swings, sways,
Sashays through the room-temperature air of this bathroom stall,
Bare-leaf'd in the autumn, my tree neither rustles
Nor permits the lark to warble,
Instead, just the quick squishy cacophony of lubed-up palm on cock,
And the rip-rap of my naked ballsack pumping to and fro in time,
Echoing off the walls of this, my office bathroom.
I really do need to find a better place to do relieve myself.
====================================
+2 for this.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-09 16:31:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Be the first on your block to get one!
COLLECT ALL FOUR!
Submitted by EAZEDZT (user info) at 2005-12-09 16:28:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Today I am finally somebody...
I have had a post reviewd in poetic form by the 'O'
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2005-12-09 16:06:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
She said:
When fingers last deploy in pink-thin folds,
Disappearing like so much hair from Donald Trump's dome,
I look down and see that I've become a leper,
For my digits, once more, have escaped me,
Fled to the shaved, flushed Egypt of my loins.
Rock now the boat, fingertips!
Stir the honeypot - my bee is in the bonnett!
Make me quiver like bowled jell-o resting on a fat man's fupa.
Wait - I feel a stirring in the force,
Double your efforts, Tarkin,
For Lazarus will rise again.
He said:
When grip takes hold and flexing hand attacks the root
Of my trunk, my branch swings, sways,
Sashays through the room-temperature air of this bathroom stall,
Bare-leaf'd in the autumn, my tree neither rustles
Nor permits the lark to warble,
Instead, just the quick squishy cacophony of lubed-up palm on cock,
And the rip-rap of my naked ballsack pumping to and fro in time,
Echoing off the walls of this, my office bathroom.
I really do need to find a better place to do relieve myself.
Submitted by Draqus (user info) at 2005-12-09 15:30:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EAZEDZT (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:54:06 (#)
Ranking: 0
The best part about masturbation is there is ony a momentary feeling of guilt after.
It's nothing like a relationship.
=====================
What?
Masturbation's so good, it makes me cum afterwards.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-12-09 14:40:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You forgot hairy palms.
Submitted by mbstateside (user info) at 2005-12-09 14:38:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by EAZEDZT (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:54:06 (#)
Ranking: 0
The best part about masturbation is there is ony a momentary feeling of guilt after.
It's nothing like a relationship.
-------------------------------------------------
WHAT!!!!!!!!!!
Can't say I've ever felt guilty about it. A little dirty maybe but I'd consider that pretty normal given the shit I think about while jacking off.
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2005-12-09 14:24:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by EAZEDZT (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:54:06 (#)
Ranking: 0
The best part about masturbation is there is ony a momentary feeling of guilt after.
========================================
You feel that too? It must be a catholic childhood thing.
Submitted by EAZEDZT (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:54:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The best part about masturbation is there is ony a momentary feeling of guilt after.
It's nothing like a relationship.
Submitted by EAZEDZT (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:53:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I do
Submitted by MistressFist (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:53:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I fully endorse masturbation.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-12-09 13:50:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Thank God for masturbation.