Save Your Testicles! (918 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.5 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Oscar <quatatoe_king.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-11-21 15:06:26 EST
Ever ridden a bike and felt as though your chode was getting pressed into your abdominal cavity by your Specialized "Body Geometry" bicycle seat?
Probably. Even if you don't have one of those bullshit seats that are supposed to be comfortable, but end up giving you hemorrhoids, chances are that you've experienced the pain of ridingon a conventional bike seat.
I've read in a couple magazines now that some people are seriously worried about current bike seat designs harming their health. Specifically, the men. They'e worried it might case impotence or something like that. Fair enough. While I don't think my manhood is in any particular danger other than that of moderate discomfort, I still think it's time for a revolution in this field of science.
So, all dissatisfied bikers, meet your revolutionary.
I drew a picture of my idea a long time ago in MSPAINT (September 26th, 2004), and came up with the idea about two years beforehand. The idea is that you change the way the seat is oriented, so that you have a well-cushioned sideways facing seat that you rest your ass on. This means the pressure is all on the fleshiest part of your body (POOPER!), and there's no contact with the delicate perineum.
Also, this actually required fewer materials than the conventional seat, because there's no flaring: it's basically just a straight bar (in the picture I've included, it's cylindrical for simplicity's sake. My original idea was for a flatter design).
So throw out those bullshit Body Geometry seats, throw out your tattered "gel seat" slip on cushions. You need no longer fear the torture of your bike seat!
Your savior has arrived!
User Reviews
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-11-28 09:40:27 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
NURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2004-11-21 16:33:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
you'd fall off. you need a cafeteria chair style bike seat.
Submitted by X-File (user info) at 2004-11-21 16:02:15 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I thought it said: SHAVE YOUR TESTICLES.
Too bad.
Submitted by CoachMagirk27 (user info) at 2004-11-21 15:59:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
too late!
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2004-11-21 15:43:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
What the ghey?
Submitted by mike18 (user info) at 2004-11-21 15:40:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Sell that idea to George Foreman.
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-11-21 15:28:32 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck kind of bike is that? It doesn't have a rear wheel?