what the fuck is going on (511 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.64 on 17 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Beefy (View user info) at 2009-08-25 11:42:48 EDT
I was going to dive straight into the fictional, but I just recieved the most horrifying news I have ever had to suffer. Now, I'm in work, so I'll make it quick.
I just recieved a phone call from my mother regarding my younger brother. He turned 12 about 3 months ago, and being the youngest of three siblings and the only boy, he's a spoilt little shit and is still referred to as the 'baby.' He is the apple of my fathers eye and the thorn in my fucking side.
Anywhos. She rung me up to tell me he'd finally got a girlfriend and he'd brought her into the pub to play pool. '...' I thought. How fucking pointless Jane. Thanks alot.
'Yes, well,' my mother gasped, 'She's 16!'
I promptly spat the semen I have been storing in my cheecks all over my John and did a quick look around for Helen from the local titty bar that moonlights as a whore before mopping it up with my supple, 17 year old tongue.
'16? One year younger than me, and he's just turned 12? Are you serious?'
I struggled to decide whether I should take all of this bloke's penis deep in my quivering ass, or just let him tweak my twat then floss with a pube.
'She's really nice Bethan, no need to be a bitch about it. I just thought you'd be pleased for him.'
Oh yes, really fucking thrilled. I am sitting here, talking to my mom whilst a stranger prods my womanly parts with a cock that reeks of month old milk while being the only one who thinks it's slightly sickening that a sixteen year old girl is happy for a pre-teen to be poking her? By the age of fourteen I had accomplished my first Cleveland Steamer and been fisted by the varsity team. Clearly this girl has other ideas.
Maybe I know this girl. I shall be finding out her name and address soon. I swear to God if I find out this girl corrupts my brother and even looks at his crotch fuck her father until his balls empty deep into my silken cavern and force her mother to munch my clit and suck out his throat yogurt. Jesus.
I suddenly realised my mother was still on the phone at this point, and managed to catch her say 'Yes well, you've had more late night cunt reapings than I've had horse cocks anyway so don't go looking for this girl and threaten to fuck her parents. I know what you're like, you common gutter slut.'
So, well fucking done to my brother, congratulations and all that jazz.
I'm being raped by a paedo, and you have forever lost the power to make fun of me for asking me what virtue was.
User Reviews
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2009-08-25 18:49:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
meh.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-08-25 17:12:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
well fey, every dog has his day.
even the retarded dog.
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2009-08-25 16:24:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2009-08-25 15:01:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:28:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This was a poor effort at parody. Trust me, I'm an expert in everything.
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2009-08-25 15:01:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:28:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This was a poor effort at parody. Trust me, I'm an expert in everything.
________
I think this is the second time sico's made me smile.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2009-08-25 14:04:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hah, "scrote yogurt"
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2009-08-25 14:00:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:35:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:27:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sticking with scrote yogurt.
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I prefer the more scientifically accurate term "Baby Batter."
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:28:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This was a poor effort at parody. Trust me, I'm an expert in everything.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:27:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sticking with scrote yogurt.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:24:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:22:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What the hell is "throat yogurt"?
Scrote yogurt makes more sense to me.
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throat yogurt...
you know...."man glaze"
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:22:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What the hell is "throat yogurt"?
Scrote yogurt makes more sense to me.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:20:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/122327
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:14:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Accidental double post, my boy.
Bad connection.
Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:13:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Took you two attempts to post this? What the fuck?
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:03:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Just trying to make your inane drivel interesting, Beefcurtain.
Submitted by Beef (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:00:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
How stupid of me, this is exactly how it happened. How could I have forgot?
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-08-25 11:52:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what the fuck is going on