rambling (409 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.5 on 17 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by iambetteratit (View user info) at 2009-08-25 03:06:10 EDT
So tonight i was having some problems getting to sleep I took 3 ambien cr and now i am going to write for your enjoyment the shit going through my head. I dont feel fucking tired I just feel fucking weird, sort of like my eyes don't want to focus properly, and my nose is stuffed up even though I havent been sick in months.. i wonder if that a side affect? I wonder if I report that side effect if I can get something out of the deal? (side note after about half way i blew my nose and its no longer stuffed)
like money or cars or women... fuck it ill take the money I can buy both of the other ones with it. and don't you tell me money cant buy happyness hand some homeless bum on the street 10 miniion bucks and see if he dosnt shit bricks doing fbackflips.
If I had alot of money I would probably have a few houses, I'm thinking one in switzerland so I can get my ski on in the winter, and I want to buy a house by cape sunion in Greece, best view I have ever seen I would pay whever it took to live there. I would have a big city house in NY, LA, London, Rome, FUUUCK PARIS if they were'nt such dicks to Americans I would go there. I am actually very polite as a tourist, I attempt the language, I tip well and I try not to make my country look bad in the eyes of others but some of these fat fucks waddling around europe with old glory stitched on their backpacks HAVE TO GO!!
anyway I would also have a house in tokyo, have you seen the cool shit they have there? and if you are into asian women thats definetly the place to go... seeeeexy. Then probably a house in aussie for surfing and a house in tahiti to just get away from the rest of the world and just relax and think about shit maybe get one of those old school canoes and do a little fishing. That would be fun.
I'd buy a house on the medaterranian sea entirely out of black and white marble with pillers and corinthin columns with red dres in between.
Then come back to the states and hire Ronnie Coleman to be my personal trainer and that asshole from hells kitchen to be my chef, but he better keep the fucking attitude in the kitchin because one outburst out of him and ill drown him in a crab pot. I would have a huge nice house on the water with a boat and 2 jetskis.
For my cars I would need at least 4 of them I would need a riced out acura RSX type S with all the gadgets and gizmoz and shit to make it fast as hell, then I would hire grafitti artists to spraypaint their tags all over it and then get it sealed so it still looks shiny and new with a custom paint job.
Then I would have my luxury car and no im not going rap star with it and getting a bently or a phantom. I will stick with a BMW 7 series with all the nice shit you can get for it.
Then comes the party wagon to transport myself and my staff around I'm thinking stretch range rover all black
no chrome rims
no chrome lights
just murderd out black paint job
with a loud obnoxious sound syestem so the car is as loud as the club because I HATE the 3 minutes it take to acclimatize to a night club atmosphere
then daddy's baby my bright red bugatti veyron with any upgrade possible and a sign in the paint that says "so what if im compensating your wife is still checkin me out!"
ok now it's time to talk more about my entorage here I would need my trainer ronnie, my cook the guy from hells kitchen, my designated drunk driver aka my brother and a couple other friends now a bunch of small rich usually drunk white boys traveling the globe and undoubtedly cause us to come into many situations where violence could happen and that ladies and getlemen is why I am hiring blackwater as my security the whole company will revolve around keeping me and my friends and employees safe.
When I want to go to the club or the bar i have a recon force go scope the place and report back on impartant thinks like wemon present and ohh yeah my safety. then i would get everyone supershit faced drunk and bring no less than 5 girls home for me, first pick of the litter to give my seed to them. leave them in the hotel suite the next morning whie we're all packed up to go to another country and do it all over again, thats what i will do.
Hope you enjoy this If you think this would make a great TV show give me some money and ill make sure they film every minute of it!
User Reviews
Submitted by iambetteratit (user info) at 2009-08-27 07:49:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
wow holy shit I didnt even see this till now
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2009-08-25 22:16:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I loled at scourge.
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2009-08-25 21:38:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's interesting to observe how lack of sleep during the wee hours can lead one's mind to philosophical and existential musings. You seem like a very complex and sensitive individual.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-08-25 17:16:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
2 jetskis?
TWO?!?!
you talkin' 'bout rollin' large, boy.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-08-25 12:29:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You better do yourself a favor and get an awesome auger from Billy Mays. That would be the only option you have for digging for a bigger pile of shit than this.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-08-25 10:58:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HAH @ below
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2009-08-25 10:56:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
If I were you, I'd also invest heavily in an education as it appears, by your writing, that your have yet to complete the third grade.
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2009-08-25 04:48:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
you delivered what you promised
Submitted by iambetteratit (user info) at 2009-08-25 04:43:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
its a shame we never shall
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-08-25 04:41:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
neither do i
Submitted by iambetteratit (user info) at 2009-08-25 04:39:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
dont know what they are
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-08-25 04:23:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
have you ever eaten golden cherries
Submitted by iambetteratit (user info) at 2009-08-25 04:01:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I did, you cant die from overdosing you just sleep for a day or 2
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-08-25 03:55:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
take the whole bottle
Submitted by iambetteratit (user info) at 2009-08-25 03:53:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
sorry the sleeping pills are making my fingers lazy
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-08-25 03:51:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
buy english
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2009-08-25 03:41:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Spend your first few dollars on learning proper composition.