Now I Know Why I Always Wanted to Visit South America... (1042 hits)
Category: Science & EnvironmentalRating: 0.51 on 71 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by S.I. Co. (View user info) at 2009-05-28 10:27:52 EDT
User Reviews
Submitted by bustedcompass (user info) at 2009-05-30 22:43:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
A point for the hot girl in the bikini.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2009-05-29 13:03:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I fuckin love hot food and we went to this Mexican restaurant and i ordered the "Chili verde" which was touted as "the hottest thing on the menu".
Finding it pretty weak, i dumped a fuckload of habanero sauce on and started having orgasms in my mouth. Impressed, the chef brought out a bottle of this stuff:
http://www.hotsauceworld.com/357maddoghot.html
With the admonition "Is not salsa. Is poison"
I mixed in a bit and seriously tripped balls for about 5 minutes. Blood was racing through my head and i was dizzy and couldn't see straight. SHit was fucked up and kept coming on harder and harder, it was seriously like a drug overdose.
And that's the end of that story.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-29 10:56:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-29 10:53:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahahahaha @ Sgt.
Dude, lay off the fucking coke.
--------------------------
HAH
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-29 10:53:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahahahaha @ Sgt.
Dude, lay off the fucking coke.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-29 10:50:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-29 10:38:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He changed my oil in exchange for a clean car and I accidentally bought him an air freshener to go in his car that smelled like Pina Colada, bwahahahahaha!!!!
==============================
he banged my bang in exchange for a clean bang and I banged him an air bang to go in his car that smelled like banging, bangANGangANGangANGangANG!
hahaha
punching teeth out with dick? goddamn Sico, thats ummmmm.....sick, or something.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-29 10:44:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/122342#2901473 <----- Do you remember doing this by the way?
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-29 10:43:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Likes Pina Coladas, below.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-29 10:41:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And by changed my oil she meant I punched her teeth out with my dick.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-29 10:38:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Are you fucking kidding me Sgt? Sico is one of my best good friends, we are DEFINITELY NOT banging.
He changed my oil in exchange for a clean car and I accidentally bought him an air freshener to go in his car that smelled like Pina Colada, bwahahahahaha!!!!
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-29 10:32:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-29 09:51:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Seriously, I picked out that air freshener because it was so fucking fly looking...blue and yellow camo? Come the hell on!! It was only after I bought it (from a vending machine, mind you) that I noticed it was Pina Colada. It was unintentionally fucking hilarious and you know it. But at least now your car looks and smells Sage-Fancy!
Muah!
--------------------
so you and sico are full-on banging now I take it??
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-29 10:02:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Just to blow your shit up a bit more...the below song always reminds me of that movie Dirty Work where they're about to get in a bar fight...God I loved Chris Farley.
Mike Anscombe: Looks like there's gonna be a brawl. You playin' something good?
Jimmy: Hell, yeah! Rolling Stones, Street Fighting Man! G-7!
Mike Anscombe: ...you just hit G-8.
[Jimmy looks shocked, as Escape, the Pina Colada Song, blasts from the jukebox]
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-29 09:57:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I was tired of my lady, we'd been together too long
Like a worn-out recording of a favorite song
So while she lay there sleepin', I read the paper in bed
And in the personal columns there was this letter I read
'If you like Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain
If you're not into yoga, if you have half a brain
If you like making love at midnight in the dunes on the cape
Then I'm the love that you've looked for write to me and escape'
I didn't think about my lady, I know that sounds kinda mean
But me and my old lady had fallen into the same old dull routine
So I wrote to the paper, took out a personal ad
And though I'm nobody's poet, I thought it wasn't half bad
"Yes, I like Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain
I'm not much into health food, I am into champagne
I've got to meet you by tomorrow noon and cut through all this red tape
At a bar called O'Malleys where we'll plan our escape"
So I waited with high hopes and she walked in the place
I knew her smile in an instant, I knew the curve of her face
It was my own lovely lady and she said, "Oh, it's you?"
Then we laughed for a moment and I said, "I never knew"
"That you liked Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain
And the feel of the ocean and the taste of the champagne
If you like making love at midnight in the dunes on the cape
You're the lady I've looked for, come with me and escape"
If you like Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain
If you're not into yoga, if you have half a brain
If you like making love at midnight in the dunes on the cape
Then I'm the love that you've looked for, write to me and escape
Yes, I like Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain
I'm not much into health food, I am into champagne
I've got to meet you by tomorrow noon and cut through all this red tape
At a bar called O'Malleys where we'll plan our escape
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-29 09:51:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Seriously, I picked out that air freshener because it was so fucking fly looking...blue and yellow camo? Come the hell on!! It was only after I bought it (from a vending machine, mind you) that I noticed it was Pina Colada. It was unintentionally fucking hilarious and you know it. But at least now your car looks and smells Sage-Fancy!
Muah!
Submitted by SOLO2 (user info) at 2009-05-29 00:23:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Look out for sharks!
Submitted by RoadSong (user info) at 2009-05-29 00:22:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 07:49:55 PDT (#)
Ranking: 0
In said and tragic news I learned of my uncle's death yesterday. He was young. What's tragic is that I don't know if he committed suicide or was poisoned. Definitely had antifreeze in his system. This whole story is a mess and drinking didn't make it go away :(
I'm going back to work now. Enjoy, my loverlies.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
WHAT?
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2009-05-28 22:25:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
that is one hot tranny. oh simon, you know i have a soft spot for trannies, sillybuns!
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2009-05-28 16:38:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
the wild west still thrives in brazil...anyone with an iq above room temerature can go down there and within 160 days fly back home with 250k, 500k or more, tax free
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2009-05-28 16:36:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My woman bought kosher hot dogs, which means the bovines they came from had their throat slit by a rabbi. Last night I had a dream where this crazy guy on the bus sitting across from me kept taking out a nasty pocket knife and saying, "This is how they do it to the cows", then making a throat slashing motion. Eventually, a bunch of people held me down and he kept saying, "This is how they do it to the cows, I"ll show you."
He then proceeded to slash my throat, I woke up gasping for air and clutching at my throat.
I'm never eating cow again.
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2009-05-28 14:42:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
mmmm....steak
Sico and I now have three things in common...
Pasty white skin, ubersite, and steak.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2009-05-28 14:26:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2009-05-28 13:19:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Be warned: yerba mate is a strong and fast-acting laxative and may result in what I like to call the "Argentine power dump."
--------------------------------------------------------
Perhaps, but coffee has laxative properties also. So does cocaine, and most other stimulants.
Submitted by cocaine (user info) at 2009-05-28 14:25:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nice. i always felt that it was chicken fingers that most resembled our swarthy latino-american-bretheren's continent.
much like this:
http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1288/1186475539_12f778f06a.jpg
or these:
http://www.eatingwell.com/recipes/img/recipe_images/MP4738.JPG
or these delicious monsters:
http://img.timeinc.net/recipes/i/recipes/ck/clce/chicken-fingers-ck-479069-l.jpg
now i'm hungry. and i hate that gay azz tgi friday's guy with the frosted tips...yeah.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2009-05-28 13:35:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 12:53:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I almost, kinda missed my trolls :) Glad to see you're all still here though...or come out of the woodwork for me. You guys are swell!
===
how long were you gone? a week, top? wow
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2009-05-28 13:19:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Be warned: yerba mate is a strong and fast-acting laxative and may result in what I like to call the "Argentine power dump."
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2009-05-28 12:56:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 12:53:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I almost, kinda missed my trolls :) Glad to see you're all still here though...or come out of the woodwork for me. You guys are swell!
Submitted by no1hasdis (user info) at 2009-05-28 12:30:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2009-05-28 11:20:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
gtfo
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2009-05-28 12:26:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
YOUSOFUUNY
Submitted by viciousness63 (user info) at 2009-05-28 12:15:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ayahuasca...
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2009-05-28 12:04:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have a good friend living in Porto Alegre, in Rio Grande do Sul province, at the bottom of Brazil. Once you get that far south in S. America, the population gets very much whiter and more countrified, and yes, it is indeed well known for it's barb-ques, "Asados" where they'll roast a whole cow.
If you ever go to the area, or Argentina, try Yerba Mate, it's their version of coffee, only a bit stronger, and is drunk through a special silver straw, out of a hollowed, decorated gourd (Bomba/bombadilla(straw))
Surprising facts,
1) Argentina is mostly white (98%?), mostly composed of European immigrants.
2)Argentina, and to a larger extent, Brazil, both have long established American communities, though for the most part they've become integrated into the local culture. They're the descendants of Confederates who fled after the civil war, and named their communities "Americana" or "Dixie-land."
3)There is also a very large population of Amish/Mennonite/Quakers who fled during times of drafting for war purposes.
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2009-05-28 12:03:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.brazilgirls.com/
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-05-28 11:39:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
If you could get kidnapped in one of those little third-world armpit countries that don't have teh interwebz that would be awesome.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-05-28 11:33:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2009-05-28 11:24:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2009-05-28 16:09:35 BST (#)
Ranking: 1
i figured it was for the lady boys :)
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-05-28 11:23:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Now I remember why I hate clicking your posts...
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2009-05-28 11:20:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
gtfo
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2009-05-28 11:09:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
i figured it was for the lady boys :)
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2009-05-28 11:03:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
haha.. made me laugh..
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-05-28 11:01:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-28 15:52:32 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Most of the places we fish are catch and release, so no.
I suck at fishing. http://www.ubersite.com/m/122325#2900839
~~~~~
Oh dear, what a day!
Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:57:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:54:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hi reddy. I'm only coming back for this brief second to field FJ's question.
No sir, I have not eaten any of the fish I have caught. Most of the places around my house are "catch and release." Now seriously. I haven't done anything all day sans use the titrating aquameter and that only takes seconds. I must look productive.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:53:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i sure have missed these informative posts that provide a breeding ground for retards chatting utter shit.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:52:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Most of the places we fish are catch and release, so no.
I suck at fishing. http://www.ubersite.com/m/122325#2900839
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:50:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Missed you
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:50:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What I want to know is, have you grilled any of these fish you are both so adept at catching?
*sits back expectantly*
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:49:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
In said and tragic news I learned of my uncle's death yesterday. He was young. What's tragic is that I don't know if he committed suicide or was poisoned. Definitely had antifreeze in his system. This whole story is a mess and drinking didn't make it go away :(
I'm going back to work now. Enjoy, my loverlies.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:46:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:44:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Raydon can't remember if she ate or accidentally spilled her food. I don't either. All I know is that I woke up in my bed and hurt a bit this morning.
***********************
I fixed her a nice plate...even cut up her hot dog and put the delectable dipping sauces (ketchup and mustard, of course) on the side and brought it up to her. She was on her way down the steps and definitely fell DOWN them and of course the food went everywhere.
At least you have a sink and dishwasher full of clean dishes, not to mention a clean kitchen.
I know I know, I'm the fucking best.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:45:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:34:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WHY IS MY LIFE SO FRAUGHT WITH THESE INTERNAL CONFLICTS?
WHY CAN'T I BE A HAPPY, SOBER, SANE MAN?
************************
You must be a Pisces.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:44:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
FJ FOR THE WIN!
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:44:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Raydon can't remember if she ate or accidentally spilled her food. I don't either. All I know is that I woke up in my bed and hurt a bit this morning.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:43:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I love posts that give us the Sico & Sage Experience :o)
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:43:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh yeah, and some lightly seasoned corn. Not on a cookie sheet, but in a pot, mind.
Typical "Italian" that he is, Sico passed out within minutes of consuming it all.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:41:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:35:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
With the onset of what I refer to as "grilling season" I've had quite enough red meat the last few days. I'll go on record and say that I could literally feel my body contracting gout and therefore made last night a "chicken night"....not on the grill though. I made sage cook it because my brother's girlfriend and I were too drunk.
***************
That'd be hot dogs, chicken with barbecue sauce and french fries. All on the same cookie sheet folks, that's fuckin' right.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:39:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Phils are doing pretty good. In a battle with the Mets which is suspected this time of year. I think we're a 1/2 game back. A bit pissed that they don't get more national air time seeing how they are the defending champions and all but when can I do, short of getting the season ticket? Joe Blanton threw a 11-strike, 7-inning shutout the other night which was pretty impressive and other than that, everyone's bat has been pretty big. Raul Ibanez has been quite the stud.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:39:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What's funny about this post is the fact that it brings to mind an anecdote.
You were on your way to another passed out drunken evening in the country on Sunday night and we were looking at family vacation books. You took a look at a a picture of the Husk & the Wiff kissing in the sunset while they were in Hawaii and proceeded to say "this reminds me of the other day when I was looking at a map of South America and realized it was shaped like a steak."
How you made the connection of Husk & Wiff kissing in the sunset and South America looking like a steak is FAR beyond me, but kudos, because it was and still is quite amusing.
<3 xoxo
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:37:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Por la cocaina?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:37:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'VE MOVED ON TO BEZBOL TALK NOW. KEEP UP PLEASE.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:36:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry scourge. This does say "...Made Simple" Perhaps I was precognitive in making assumptions.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:36:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HOW THOSE PHILS DOING?
CARDS TOOK BACK FIRST YESTERDAY, AND MY SUMMER IS (HOPEFULLY) GOING TO BE STARTING HERE FOR REAL IN A FEW DAYS. CAN'T WAIT TO GET TO A COUPLE BALLGAMES.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:35:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
With the onset of what I refer to as "grilling season" I've had quite enough red meat the last few days. I'll go on record and say that I could literally feel my body contracting gout and therefore made last night a "chicken night"....not on the grill though. I made sage cook it because my brother's girlfriend and I were too drunk.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:35:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WHY DO YOU TORMENT ME SO, UNIVERSE???
WHY?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:34:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WHY IS MY LIFE SO FRAUGHT WITH THESE INTERNAL CONFLICTS?
WHY CAN'T I BE A HAPPY, SOBER, SANE MAN?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:34:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
but i don't like red meat, so maybe -2 was right...
???
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:33:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
and i guess the beef will clog up your colon eventually and they'll have to cram one of those camera snake deals up your asshole to ferret out the problem and that sure makes me chuckle
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:32:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
and her bikini IS very nice. the red suits her.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:31:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Scourge you big meanie! You fucked up my streak before I even had one!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:31:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
okay, maybe i reacted a little harshly at first
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:31:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
wait, i meant this one
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:31:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually it's Filipino and no she's not. I know a few Filipino broads and I don't think this is one of them :( but we can say she is for argument sake.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:30:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
She's not South American - She's Philipino.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:29:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you are a genuine nut.
that is all.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-28 10:29:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment