Berty writes a story about spring (936 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.18 on 74 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Berty (View user info) at 2009-04-08 04:41:56 EDT
"On 14th March 1876, on this hallowed ground, did the erstwhile Esther Montgomery establish this institution with a view towards strengthening women's community members so as to better win the rights of suffrage which we all enjoy to this day."
The speaker was a small, thin, man; a reverend from his dog collar and his introduction. Why he'd chosen women's suffrage as the focus of his speech was lost on Kirsty, as was the insistence that all the schoolgirls be herded out of the warm classrooms to sit on the field for an hour long bore.
Kirsty thrust her hands deeper into her shirt sleeves, gripping her elbows and bowing her head against the weak morning sun; which washed all before it in thin rays which seemed to do nothing more than emphasise the chilly breeze that scampered across the playing field. Peeking to the right down the line of children sat in front of the small, humbly erected, stage, she watched her classmates attend similar poses of bored attention. None of them looked as cold as she did. They never did. Kirsty wrinkled her nose and farted into the cold earth beneath her.
"...and the traditions which have allowed this community to flourish. Now as we look forward to the new challenges that come before us, we do well to remember those that have toiled before us; that we all stand atop the shoulders of giants who lift us up so that we may do more."
A bead of sweat trickled from Kirsty's shoulder and slid down into her armpit. Removing her arms from her sleeves she easily turned her attention from the speech to the blades of grass which sprung up in the midst of her folded legs. Reaching down and plucking a blade, she would then shred it across her fingernail. Then she'd shred it again and again and again until it was all gone.
No longer hearing the Reverend's words, she listened to its tone: a pealing note which noted a distinct sentence or two, then a rise to some point or statement followed by an inevitable slump. Then the distinct drone started up again. Over and over it went until Kirsty heard a more urgent drone, a more massive drone, and instinctively raised her eyes to the skies. A plane was passing over and threatened to drown out all attempts at oration. Kirsty had been on a plane once when her family went to Malta. It was hot in Malta and she'd enjoyed the beach, but she'd missed being able to watch her favourite TV programmes.
"...as Christ sacrificed himself for us. It is his rebirth that lends us hope, that we are invited to remember in this season of renewal. For when Jesus returned to his disciples they did not recognise him at first until he broke bread."
Suddenly darkness was everywhere and the breath of the wind seemed to chill the very blood in Kirsty's veins. She imagined ice crystals forming on her skin and shattering to cover her in broken glass and tear her up like when her little brother had run through the patio door and cut his head to ribbons. She shivered.
The cold, the drone of the Reverend and the forced sitting conspired to birth a yearning to leap up and sprint across the field. Lunchtime would be soon and Kirsty would be able to join Jane and Lisa at Their Place on the field which was just by a bricked up drainage outlet in the far corner. They called it The Balcony and would run over to it as soon as they were outside. Not because there was any hurry; they had time and there were plenty of Places for everybody, but because it always seemed so far away. Running seemed the only way to make the journey seem bearable, to make the distance seem reasonable.
"All rise!"
Kirsty's eyes snapped up and she struggled to her feet. The monotonous drone had been replaced with the sharp command of the head of year, the dreaded Mrs Coxley, who glared at the children and ordered the first line to start ambling back towards the classrooms. Just then the cloud passed on its way and the sun seemed to be re-invigorated; its rays feeling suddenly warm and soporific on Kirsty as they embraced her. She stretched her arms and walked forwards as the girl in front of her started their slow trek back to the school.
User Reviews
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2009-04-30 02:46:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This +2 is more for creating a post where I had the pleasure of accusing two uberers of insinuating that all Africans are genetically predisposed to commiting genocide...and them taking that accusation seriously, than it is for its literary content.
Sometimes I love this website.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2009-04-12 17:17:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2009-04-09 18:51:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Berty could fart on his computer fan, hit send, and see it on Most Heated in an hour. Polarizing chap, he is.
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2009-04-09 18:23:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for Malta
Submitted by RoadSong (user info) at 2009-04-09 14:46:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for using "erstwhile".
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2009-04-09 00:07:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It was just a little slice of someone else's reality.
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2009-04-08 23:34:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by MajulCartoons (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:15:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
there is no reason for this story to have been written
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2009-04-08 19:32:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
meh.
Submitted by reginajacks (user info) at 2009-04-08 17:31:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
funny
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 13:19:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I do wonder sometimes why I have spent so many years deliberatly winding up Id and Icarus. Is it because they both have I's in their usernames which prompts me to do what I do or is it because they are both Scottish?
I lie awake some nights wondering about that. Well, I don't really but I could.
Anyway, they are cracking blokes really. Particularly if you need to build something or run a fantasy football league.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-04-08 11:34:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what are esoteric?
Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2009-04-08 11:14:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:38:49 PDT (#)
Ranking: 0
this is fucking worthless, and the +2s you are getting are of even less worth. the people who have given you a 2 for this are fucking morons.
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Too ESOTERIC for you, MC?
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-04-08 10:57:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
and also - and im sure the feeling is more than mutual - i just dont like berty. i think he's a prat.
and 'prat' is a word i really dont use, cos... well... it sucks, but im using it because i really get the impression that berty is that, the epitome of prat.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-04-08 10:49:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
teh ratings dont matter, its the sentiment, and really, i just wanted to piss people off.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-04-08 10:46:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It always stuns me that people actually care about ratings.
+2!!!!
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-04-08 10:38:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
this is fucking worthless, and the +2s you are getting are of even less worth. the people who have given you a 2 for this are fucking morons.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-04-08 10:07:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
It was mediocre until this point:
>>No longer hearing the Reverend's words, she listened to its tone: a pealing note which noted a distinct sentence or two, then a rise to some point or statement followed by an inevitable slump. Then the distinct drone started up again. Over and over it went until Kirsty heard a more urgent drone, a more massive drone, and instinctively raised her eyes to the skies. A plane was passing over and threatened to drown out all attempts at oration. Kirsty had been on a plane once when her family went to Malta. It was hot in Malta and she'd enjoyed the beach, but she'd missed being able to watch her favourite TV programmes.<<
Reading this paragraph was like watching Steve Martin attempt to play Inspector Clouseau. The raw materials had potential, but the delivery was mangled by a mixture of ego, lack of finesse, and your inability to get into either the situation or your character's head.
Rewrite. Substitute generalizations for critical detail ("show" don't "tell"), flesh out your characters, consider efficiency in your wording, and try to remember that the world doesn't know who Berty is and doesn't give two shits for his authorial voice.
Submitted by Dervel (user info) at 2009-04-08 09:52:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Breakfast cereals do require rituals.
Weetabix actually demand that you drown them in milk, wait till they absorb it all, mush them up, and then drain the milk back out of them by pressing into them with the back of your spoon so that the milk collects in the bowl of the spoon. This is then eaten like soup. The now desiccated Weetabix is to be coated in sugar and given a good mix before consuming.
Who has time for that?
Coco Pops are best eaten out of a big tea cup. This makes drinking the chocolaty milk an easier and more sophisticated experience.
Good post, Berty. I especially enjoyed the bit where the ants stole the cakes.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-08 09:50:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-04-08 14:09:03 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Emission really, that I nominated it for the Norwegian Nobel Prize for Literacy should be a standing testament that I think your work is top-notch. Nobody links like you. You should be re-directing your rage to the Norwegian Nobel Prize nominations committee. It's misplaced here - I'm on your side.
Seriously, write them a letter.
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I have actually written a post about John Bonham and Suggs. You should read that.
You caught me on an off day with that link post.
beware, a camwhore extravaganza may be heading ubers way soon! either that or a photo of a monkey.
again
Ducky, i think you are magical.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2009-04-08 09:43:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I thought it was well written, but it didn't really make me think of spring. It also didn't seem to lead anywhere, too many dead-ends, like the part about their favorite place to sit during lunch.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-04-08 09:09:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Emission really, that I nominated it for the Norwegian Nobel Prize for Literacy should be a standing testament that I think your work is top-notch. Nobody links like you. You should be re-directing your rage to the Norwegian Nobel Prize nominations committee. It's misplaced here - I'm on your side.
Seriously, write them a letter.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-04-08 09:01:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nyet comment.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-08 08:50:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-04-08 13:39:20 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-08 08:24:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-04-08 12:29:37 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
I wouldn't worry too much about it Berty, after I submitted a nomination for 'Ralph the Fur Faced Chicken' they pretty much stopped all correspondence with me anyways.
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HOW VERY DARE YOU!
_________________
I beg your pardon?
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beg all you want, you infer that 'Ralph the Fur Faced Chicken' was not of necessary standard. This i cannot believe!
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-04-08 08:39:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-08 08:24:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-04-08 12:29:37 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
I wouldn't worry too much about it Berty, after I submitted a nomination for 'Ralph the Fur Faced Chicken' they pretty much stopped all correspondence with me anyways.
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HOW VERY DARE YOU!
_________________
I beg your pardon?
Submitted by TheGoat (user info) at 2009-04-08 08:35:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2009-04-08 08:29:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-08 08:24:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-04-08 12:29:37 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
I wouldn't worry too much about it Berty, after I submitted a nomination for 'Ralph the Fur Faced Chicken' they pretty much stopped all correspondence with me anyways.
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HOW VERY DARE YOU!
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-04-08 08:20:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was me in class today, however I am nearly 25 not ten..... we have this stupid lecturer who does not shut up. I spend the whole class thinking of ways to interrupt, but don't because I don't want to be murdered by my classmates after. So instead I do homework, dream and make noises with my nails on the desk. I'm not learning anything and it is such a waste of my time.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-04-08 08:20:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
All of your writing that starts with a third person account of what you did is tragically boring and typically shitty. Thanks for not letting me down as I didn't read past 2 sentences.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:58:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:42:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is the end.
Submitted by MajulCartoons (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:32:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:19:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fortunatly, Majul, I have very small feet so was easily able to place myself in her shoes.
Tell me, are you an arab? Do you have any family stories you could tell us about the old country?
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Fortunately, Berty, I am not of any Arabic descent.
Jolly good then, yes?
I do however bring many tales from the old country... many fascinating tales filled with mystique, greed and fortune...
will write them shortly... you will read, yes?
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:29:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wouldn't worry too much about it Berty, after I submitted a nomination for 'Ralph the Fur Faced Chicken' they pretty much stopped all correspondence with me anyways.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:21:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
IS MAJUL = BEANO?
anyway ducky, you do NOT appreciate my work, i cant tell, that cheeky glint in your eye, the way you wield that shank. The abundance of beautiful words trickling from your trembling lips. all this means I dont mind.
you can call me whatever you like, within the boundries of decency, i understand your dilemma with my name and said nursery rhyme. However i must make haste and go to lunch, tally ho.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:19:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fortunatly, Majul, I have very small feet so was easily able to place myself in her shoes.
Tell me, are you an arab? Do you have any family stories you could tell us about the old country?
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:16:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Your withdrawal leaves me crushed and broken. My next posts will now all be about space vampires and losers casting magic spells on jocks so that their girlfriends bite their cocks off (it will be called 'Jocs sans Cocks!') to express my lame emo-ness.
I hope you will continue to pour scorn on my wretched efforts as your attention will be all that sustains me through the dark years of 26 - 74.
Submitted by MajulCartoons (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:15:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
very good sentence structure, grammar, etc... best i've seen from most these stories (hence -1 not -2)
story rather pointless, no plot, no conclusion
starts nowhere, ends nowhere
funny in one part... when she farts beneath the cold ground...
other then that, there is no reason for this story to have been written
...you seem to have an amazing insight to how a 10 year old Christian school girl thinks
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:15:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Norway appreciates very little...they've sent me a letter recently asking me to stop sending them referrals and nomination requests...pompous fuckers really.
I appreciate your work EI...though everytime I write that I want to add an additional EI, and then an O.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:11:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I do not work in statistical analysis, but I will concur with EI.
Seconded. Motion carried. Berty will now start a new nation for us.
I will not join as sweet cereal is disgusting, but I will ask Orphelia to share some salty oatmeal with me.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:08:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
well ducky you need to read my magical stories, norway would appreciate my marvellous musings.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-04-08 07:06:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 03:46:38 PDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, in fairness, whilst it is a good post (a lot better than my last one) it isn't THAT good.
Then again capturing the essence of spring, that whole 'waiting for something awesome' vibe along with all the rest of it is difficult and I did do it quite well. So I suppose this could be considered one of the greatest literary works of the early 21st century, but perhaps it will have to be content with 3rd fiddle.
______________________
I nominated it for the Norwegian Nobel Prize for Literature, and you're telling me that it "isn't THAT good"?????
Fine I'll just retract it then.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:56:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
LOL
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:54:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I thought all my posts lately were pretty quality
I don't heat them, look at my last few posts I rarely comment.
I doubt it will be on my account actually.
I am pretty much done with posting on orphelia for a while.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:53:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 11:49:44 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
If you're shreddies taste like crap it is only because you are doing it wrong.
Don't feel too bad though. Statsitical analysis shows that the success/failure ratio is the same between preparing a nice bowl of shreddies and starting a new nation.
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I work in statstical analysis and can confirm through using my methods , berty is correct.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:52:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
will this be another hitwhore post orphelia?
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:49:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If you're shreddies taste like crap it is only because you are doing it wrong.
Don't feel too bad though. Statsitical analysis shows that the success/failure ratio is the same between preparing a nice bowl of shreddies and starting a new nation.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:49:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am posting later so I want your +2s!!
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:47:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 11:40:04 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
ei i make my own granola, it is really easy and really tasty.
I am so gonna break your streak berty
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oh cool, i buy mine from somerfield.
are you being nice to me now or ummmmm do your email comments still stand?
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:46:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, in fairness, whilst it is a good post (a lot better than my last one) it isn't THAT good.
Then again capturing the essence of spring, that whole 'waiting for something awesome' vibe along with all the rest of it is difficult and I did do it quite well. So I suppose this could be considered one of the greatest literary works of the early 21st century, but perhaps it will have to be content with 3rd fiddle.
Afterall it doesn't feature Dick Van Dyke or two people having sex in a one person sleeping bag whilst their friends watch.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:44:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked this Berty...it had a very honest, real and in the moment feel to it.
Shreddies, regardless of their preparation, are crap btw.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:40:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ei i make my own granola, it is really easy and really tasty.
I am so gonna break your streak berty
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:39:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
for my breakfast, im rather gay, i have a muller light yoghurt with granola added.
call me gay, i dare you.
crunchy nut cornflakes are a form of mind control
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:24:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i am off to do my homework before teach opens a can of whoop on my ass.
FJ, normal m&m's you peanut hater
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:21:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What terror have you unleashed on those poor souls, Spamial? Did you use up all the paper in their photocopier?
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:21:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I should -2 this for neglecting to mention the mighty breakfast snack that is Crunchy Nut Cornflakes.
I always had Orphelia down as a 'sausage for breakfast' kind of girl.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:19:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 because I spent all yesterday completely RUINING our HR department. It was most fun. Reminded me of the old days. 2 months notice period is sure to be amusing.
Ahahaha @ salty porridge.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:19:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hi ei!
god, FJ, you told me you were 26 already, what gives?
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:17:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Young lithe bodies FTW
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:17:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
berty, FJ still lives with his mum
*cough* norman bates *coughs*
What is pudgey, looks like the lead singer of scouting for girls and is slow to mail back?
FJ!
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:15:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I mean, I still have to turn 24 first, but 25 is certainly on the horizon. Don't worry Pheeley, you are ageless. Besides, girls my age are invariably rubbish at sex.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:12:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Look on the bright side Flash; you'll be able to eat Ricicles for breakfast AND lunch. Nobody will be able to tell you you can't.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:11:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
FJ!! do you have to remind one of the age gap? :(
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:06:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, God. I will be 25 soon.
:o(
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 06:03:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
heh heh, "salty porridge".
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 05:52:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 10:47:54 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
The secret to edible shreddies is to microwave a half pint of milk untill it is warm, just when the skin is emerging on the top, and carefully pour the milk into the edge of the bowl wetting as few of the tops of the shreddies as possible.
Then you take the spoon and press the shreddies down with the underside of the spoon into the milk so that they all become moist but not drenched. Sprinkle (nay pour) sugar on top of the shreddies so that all the shreddies have a perfect glazed coating of sugar. Now you may eat.
The same thing works for Rice Crispies but does not require the milk to be nuked first.
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Ugh, berty. I like salty porridge I do not care for sugary cereal, the idea turns my stomach.
the smell of cocoa pops is enough to make me wretch.
Why do men over the age of 25 always eat kids cereal?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 05:50:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought it was very British to spread marmite on it first.
One is assuming that is marmite FJ.
Does it not sting?
How come you have not replied regarding the body shot I sent you?
it' the shipmans sandwich spread isn't it? It was too much, too far.
:(
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-04-08 05:47:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The secret to edible shreddies is to microwave a half pint of milk untill it is warm, just when the skin is emerging on the top, and carefully pour the milk into the edge of the bowl wetting as few of the tops of the shreddies as possible.
Then you take the spoon and press the shreddies down with the underside of the spoon into the milk so that they all become moist but not drenched. Sprinkle (nay pour) sugar on top of the shreddies so that all the shreddies have a perfect glazed coating of sugar. Now you may eat.
The same thing works for Rice Crispies but does not require the milk to be nuked first.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-04-08 05:43:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
But...but...it's Wet Willy Wednesday! Cock-shots for all!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 05:33:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have just consumed a bowl of shreddies, the kids begged me for them the other day and my big box of porridge is finally empty.
Well, I may as well have eaten a dish of stamp sized pieces of cardboard.
What the hell was that?
Knitted by grannies my bum.
FJ stop mailing me knob pictures it is far too early.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-04-08 05:27:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not yet.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 05:25:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*I* mail you.
i am not the queen
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 05:15:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes, FJ, but not a poem.
We mail you.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-04-08 05:14:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-08 04:56:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment