Toilet or TV? You make the call. (798 hits)
Category: Movies & TVRating: 0.94 on 50 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Orgasmatron (View user info) at 2009-04-01 12:31:29 EDT
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/asia/article5977420.ece
Looks like some of the Dots Not Feathers are taking a stand against the fact that some 660 million in their country do their business in the open. Considering more households have a TV than a toilet, that's not surprising.
But what of us, hey? If forced to choose between having one or the other which would you sooner do without? And you can't assume "oh I can just watch TV shows on my laptop or PC" becuase all of the boo-da-doos over in the Subcontinent don't have that luxury. So therefore neither do you in this most hypothetical of situations.
Tube or toilet? What can't you live without?
With that said, I now give you the obvious response to this battle cry of "no toilet, no bride:"
No toilet, no bride
No toilet, no bride
No toilet, no bride
No toilet, no bride
Said, said, said: I remember when we used to sit
On the curbsite with our pants down,
Oba-obaserving pedestrians
As they would mingle with the waste at our feet
Good times we've had oh, good times have passed
Along the way (way)
But spend your rupees if you want our love to last;
Get me a toilet, I say.
No toilet, no bride
No toilet, no bride
Hey little darlin,
No toilet, no bride
Said, said: I remember when we used to sit
On the curbsite with our pants down
All that curry would make the fire light
And those logs would burn all through the night
And it would look like cornmeal porridge
Embarrassed, what am I to do?
I won't shit on you in our marriage
If I can get a place to poo.
If I get a john, I mean
Everything's gonna be all right!
Everything's gonna be all right!
Everything's gonna be all right!
Everything's gonna be all right!
I said, everything's gonna be all right!
Everything's gonna be all right!
Everything's gonna be all right, now!
Everything's gonna be all right!
No toilet, no bride
No - no toilet - toilet, no bride
Lover, little darlin, dont shed no tears
No toilet, no bride
REPEAT
FADE
fin
User Reviews
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2009-06-01 15:05:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2009-05-28 16:49:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Avoiding your eternal disappointment is enough for me.
~~
so....?
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2009-05-08 23:16:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
G1 phone review, Woooooo
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2009-04-21 20:21:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OH
MMM.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2009-04-19 21:13:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BOLLYWOOD HO!
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2009-04-03 12:21:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-04-03 04:38:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
picture posts
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2009-04-03 03:02:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
rarely watch tv so I'd have to say toilet.
+2 Org
Submitted by RoadSong (user info) at 2009-04-02 18:15:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This planet is running out of clean water and people think conventional toilets are a GOOD thing? Oh yes.
Here is some clean water, I think someone should crap in it.
INCINERATOR TOILETS are the wave of the future. http://www.incinolet.com/
Television and conventional toilets both should be neutralized.
Some towns are DRINKING recycled toilet water. No shit.
*wanders off looking for a monkey flinging poo astride a Border Collie*
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2009-04-01 18:37:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:34:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't think I'd want to go without a toilet. Nor would I want anyone else to. Modern sanitation has done wonders for civilization. Believe me, you don't want to know what you can catch from unsanitary conditions, like from poop pooling around everywhere.
==
Cryptosporidium. Giardia lambia. E coli. Coliforms are nasty critters. I don't wath TV anyway.
More O poetry would be a blessing.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2009-04-01 15:03:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
miss your poems <3
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2009-04-01 14:53:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:40:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
those who can't live without TV are sad fucks.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2009-04-01 14:50:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HOW MANY BUCKETS DO I OWN?
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:40:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
those who can't live without TV are sad fucks.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:38:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I heard someone talking about the defending World Series Champions, Phillies.
Oh, well they are now!
WOOOTOOOOOTTTTTTTTOOOOOOT PHILLY!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:36:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yes, "a kill."
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:36:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i already have my RED SOX FAIL image lined up for this year's season btw.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:35:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
has scourge done the sox tribute post yet?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:34:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Mog will they ever get out of 1977???
Will Mrs. Dexter ever learn that her man's a kill???
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:29:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It depends- is Lost or Dexter on?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:29:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
They do that well...lose, I mean.
Unlike that other 'red' team that whipped the Cardinals in four straight games a few years ago.
It was an insignificant series, though, you probably don't remember it.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:19:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
and i like the reds as they usually lose to st. louis very well.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:18:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i love you, dear.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:17:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Yes, dear, you've got me right - I do so enjoy those Talented Cincinnati Reds.
Maybe Volquez will pull a gun on the mound this season, since he seemed so fond of them in the offseason. And hopefully Jay Bruce will live up to his hype.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:15:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You are an impossible bitch, scourge. RED. RED RED RED.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:14:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
or was it the reds?
why would you cheer for an ohio team?
aren't you from west virginia?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:13:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:54:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
The NL Central must not have toilets this season either because they're totally going to shit all over the Cardinals.
----
auto -2
and we'll see, we'll see.
pitching staff is looking good, we're two and three deep at mid infield and 3rd, best 1st baseman (and player) in baseball, and the best outfield in baseball. biggest problem last year was relief pitching and they have the manpower to take care of that as long front office and Tony don't make decisions based off of ego.
how are the... it's the white sox you cheer for right?
how are the white sox stacking up?
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:10:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:56:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:35:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm guessing you were listening to Elliot in the Morning today?
---
Did that intern ever settle that thing about Flouder telling her his dick size?
--------
what's it like being neighbors?
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:09:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i would like a toilet please.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:04:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The comment below was meant for Spam's post, my bad.
Yeah, I caught it up until they took a break right before the Saget interview. I love Bob Saget...he's fucking hilarious! I was shocked the first time I heard his stuff...I think it was when he was on Chappelle's Show!
HOLY FUCKING CRAP I AM FAILING AT LIFE TODAY. I POSTED THIS ON SPAM'S POST AND THE OTHER ON YOURS...WTF.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:03:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
TV. I can use the bathroom outside, like Arooo.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:00:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I hate you orphelia.
sage - yeah, I tried to stream the rest of the broadcast once I got in, but no dice. I caught it all up to the Saget interview. I'm sure that fat bastard was a sweaty mess the entire time.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-04-01 13:00:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sage sure knows how to put people asleep.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:59:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
but FJ would have done it awesomer and gayer!!
lol
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:58:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!1
You're from the area, then? Wow! Nice!
No, he never admitted it...I had to get out of the car soon after that was brought up! I am on the side of Ashley "Ive slept with likely over 200 people, motherfuckers" The Intern, though. She didnt seem to balk at the fact that he did, indeed, tell her the size of his penis.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:58:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this is awesome!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:56:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:35:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm guessing you were listening to Elliot in the Morning today?
---
Did that intern ever settle that thing about Flouder telling her his dick size?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:54:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
The NL Central must not have toilets this season either because they're totally going to shit all over the Cardinals.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:50:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
while i usually get more satisfaction from my morning dump than i do from the tv... now that baseball season is upon us though i'd have to consider channeling my inner forest creature in regards to bodily functions.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:47:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I heard about this on the afternoon sludge on Y101. This morning's EITM was rather amusing around between 8:45-9:15.
Submitted by YourNameHere (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:45:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fucking scroll wheel.
Submitted by YourNameHere (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:45:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:44:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Shit in planters, piss in bodies of water, read books.
Everyone's problems are solved.
Wait, I still get the internet, right?
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:37:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
fucking scroll wheel
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:37:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Im with FG on this one.
I mean I love Dirty Jobs but Id rather not have to live it.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:36:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
All I can say is that I addressed the perils of Indian bathroom-time MONTHS ago and no one paid it any mind: http://www.ubersite.com/m/115263
You should all be ashamed.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:36:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fuck, you can tell I didn't read your post.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:35:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm guessing you were listening to Elliot in the Morning today?
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:35:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bob "Orgasmatron" Marley FTW
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:35:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Read this already, heard of it on the radio, it's nothing new here.
I'd throw the tv out, hands down. Anything I can watch on tv I can watch on the computer.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-04-01 12:34:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't think I'd want to go without a toilet. Nor would I want anyone else to. Modern sanitation has done wonders for civilization. Believe me, you don't want to know what you can catch from unsanitary conditions, like from poop pooling around everywhere.