I just had the most fucked up dream ever. (1328 hits)
Category: Politics -> DemocratsRating: 1 on 20 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Tom (View user info) at 2009-02-18 09:15:21 EST
I just had the most fucked up dream ever.
It was a huge stadium with a marching band and a small army marching about the arena's floor. The army was carrying the Cuban flag and was marching toward another small post of soldiers holding an American flag. The Cuban army was being led by none other than Fidel Castro. After several minutes, the army comes to stop in front of the Americans and the entire stadium falls silent.
"After many decades of iron rule," Fidel said in a heavily accented, broken-sounding English, "I relinquish power and shall allow a great Democracy to take root in Cuba." And the entire stadium just starts roaring. Keith Olbermann of all goddamn people comes over the loudspeaker and starts talking dramatically about how we just watched history, kinda like on election night.
The American soldiers start applauding, and so are two women standing in front of the soldiers. These women are none other than House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. Clinton walks up to Fidel Castro and shakes his hand, allowing a moment of pause for the newspapers and various media sources to get the picture, as this is a defining moment that shakes the world's foundation. Cuba, a Democracy! Another communism falls.
Clinton returns to join Pelosi's side and shakes hands with her, also allowing the small pause. Pelosi looks very deeply at Clinton and says, "Wow, you have pretty eyes."
"Yeah, I'm told that sometimes." says Sec. Clinton as she gives that weird, creepy smile laugh thing she does.
"They're just so deep, blue, and piercing."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
And then, right there, right in front of the US Soldiers, Fidel Castro, the Cuban army, a Colosseum full of Cubans and Goddamn Keith Olbermann, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Hillary Clinton start making out. Just, making out. Hands going all up and down everything, Fidel Castro gasps, the audience falls silent; even Keith Olbermann has shut the fuck up for once.
My dream then clips to a cabin in the woods with smooth jazz playing. Inside are the aforementioned politicians. I can't remember what they were talking about, but they were wearing robes and shit with a fireplace going in the background and I think it was leading into a porno but then I woke up.
Thank God I woke up.
I'm going to go take a shower and schedule an appointment with a therapist.
User Reviews
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2009-02-19 13:00:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Freud would have a field day.
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2009-02-19 09:14:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I would actually watch that.
...just to say I saw it.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2009-02-19 07:58:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm going to go take a shower and schedule an appointment with a therapist.
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wise choice.
Submitted by cheerios (user info) at 2009-02-18 19:14:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Made me smile.
Submitted by Tom (user info) at 2009-02-18 18:18:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Not at all, actually. I woke up laughing.
Submitted by Cyrus (user info) at 2009-02-18 17:21:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Yes - Rob has once again inserted his finger to touch upon an important aspect of your dream.
Were you aroused by the prospect of lesbanian sex between Pelosi and Clinton?
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2009-02-18 17:17:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Consequences after watching a AARP porn tape the night before?
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2009-02-18 16:11:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Did you wake up with a boner?
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2009-02-18 15:43:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Are you Tom from yspace? You're my only friend. I'm glad that we have so much in common.
Also, I didn't read this. Was it good? What was it about?
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2009-02-18 14:27:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rachelbee (user info) at 2009-02-18 18:10:58 GMT (#)
Ranking: 0
i feel like this would be a good episode of south park.
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I feel like this would be a good episode of Oprah.
Submitted by rachelbee (user info) at 2009-02-18 13:10:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i feel like this would be a good episode of south park.
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2009-02-18 12:30:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I like the ground horse.
Submitted by Replen (user info) at 2009-02-18 11:25:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2009-02-18 10:56:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Just a shower and a therapist?
Hell man I'd be scrubbing my brain with bleach after a nightmare like that.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2009-02-18 10:52:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ground-horse is an acquired taste.
Submitted by Tom (user info) at 2009-02-18 10:48:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not so sure about that.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2009-02-18 10:39:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
With apologies to Jeanneee, this is much better than that Ground-Horse bullshit. And I don't mean horse that has been ground into meaty little bits, I mean that fucking equine that burrows around and stares at people.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-02-18 09:53:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
heh
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2009-02-18 09:45:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
yeah!
I'd be the meat in that sandwich any day.
I just puked a little.
Submitted by rubbermaid (user info) at 2009-02-18 09:35:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Uh, nice moves.
Yeah, nice moves.