More Christmas cheer: Job security for shrinks (14636 hits)
Category: GraphicsRating: 1.86 on 58 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Forensic (View user info) at 2008-12-22 11:10:01 EST
User Reviews
Submitted by Deidra (user info) at 2009-07-13 13:50:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Trypno (user info) at 2009-02-22 15:33:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Trishtopher (user info) at 2008-12-23 20:56:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Some of those Santas are creepy fuckers...I'd be screaming if I were in their lap too.
Also, I've been the Easter Bunny. The annonominity of it was great as I knew most of the people that worked in the mall, but the inside of a giant bunny head smells remarkably like feet and five day old scrambled eggs. Blech...
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That was just your breath you were smelling.
Also, I was scared when I first sat in Santa's lap too...I think it traumatised me...maybe that's why I wear santa suits on my killing sprees...
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2009-01-29 15:06:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Congrats on B@W!
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-01-29 12:29:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
OMG!!! This is on B@W!
Thank you, Bart!
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-01-26 08:22:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Great compilation.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2009-01-10 05:54:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2009-01-09 15:01:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/120569#2841276
what part of it?
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-12-27 12:12:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ha ha. Brilliant post.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-12-26 02:00:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9ESphZkANc&feature=PlayList&p=70D67E94D9283632&index=0&playnext=1
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2008-12-24 17:06:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
They teach us to be terrified of strangers, then the first thing they do is throw us in a stranger's lap--a drunk one wearing a mask or makeup, which is frightening on a primal level anyway. Then they wonder why we end up being pole dancers.
Submitted by Trishtopher (user info) at 2008-12-23 20:56:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Some of those Santas are creepy fuckers...I'd be screaming if I were in their lap too.
Also, I've been the Easter Bunny. The annonominity of it was great as I knew most of the people that worked in the mall, but the inside of a giant bunny head smells remarkably like feet and five day old scrambled eggs. Blech...
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-12-23 16:23:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This has sparked a brilliant idea for a post. Thank you, FG.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2008-12-23 10:25:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is the kind of thing that makes me miss being able to get into uber from work.
When I was in college, I worked in the mall. We could see the Santa scene from the store where I worked. Watching little kids freak out was our only perk for working there.
What was worse was the Easter Bunny. I'm glad we didn't have that going on when I was a kid, that thing is really freaky.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-12-23 00:12:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I've got one of these of my daughter on my gay facebook page. She looks scared.
Wow...that's so fucking interesting, Danny, you fag. You facebook fag.
Fuck you, I'm not on there much. At all. And I'm only on there to...uh...fuck you.
What a loser. Drink some more whiskey you lousy drunk.
I'm way ahead of you, knob-cheese.
These two malcreados fought a bit more, but ended up hugging. They went on to live happily ever after.
Submitted by RoadSong (user info) at 2008-12-22 22:23:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-12-22 19:32:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
<3
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2008-12-22 18:33:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
This is like sneaking a peak at Bubba's holy of holys.
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-12-22 17:58:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Traumatize thy neighbor.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-12-22 17:56:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I AM NOT A GOTH!!!
**weeps and cuts**
Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2008-12-22 16:40:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
FG, admit it, you're the one with: this one's got a temper......
You're next to Future Goth(KK)
Cool post!!
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2008-12-22 16:22:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i have a picture of me trying to escape from santa. actually, i was going to post it. maybe i will.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-12-22 16:13:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This would probably be right up your alley...if you haven't seen it already.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFwvs8eYt6E&feature=channel
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-12-22 15:37:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If there is some God who tallys my charities and blasphemies and deeds good and bad, and with them weighs my soul and finds it upon my death to be too heavy to ascend into Heaven, then I suppose that my personal punishment will be to play, for all eternity, Santa in Hell's mall.
Submitted by Sidivan (user info) at 2008-12-22 15:28:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
4th Santa from the bottom on the left side does NOT look holly or jolly.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-12-22 15:06:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Duck Sauce Below.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2008-12-22 15:01:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Needs more Weezy Clause
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-12-22 14:58:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ha
Submitted by Porcelain (user info) at 2008-12-22 14:31:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I feel bad for those Santa Clauses.
Submitted by WiKi (user info) at 2008-12-22 13:59:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
my daughter cries when santa grabs her, too
i mean, when she sits on his lap
i mean.. fuck.
here's hoping that this year will be different.. i have to take her to see santa today or tomorrow. i'm sure she'll cry. ah well.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-12-22 13:44:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hawesome.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2008-12-22 13:36:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I got this in my email. Well, sort of. There is a kid or two that wasn't in mine and yours is missing my favorite kid.
My favorite kid is open mouthedly crying on santas lap pursing/bucking out it's teeth at santa. The face is friggin priceless and the picture looks like it's from the 60's or something.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2008-12-22 13:36:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
we didn't get santa pictures that i'm aware of. i guess my parents were confident they could give us issues without the help of strange men's laps.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-12-22 13:20:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ha, those Santas are lucky that Jeanneee desn't sit on their knee
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-12-22 13:14:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-12-22 13:05:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
And to think, somewhere around 85% of the Santas had a stiffie before/while the photographs were taken....
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-12-22 12:53:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I could add a few here from this weekend.....shit my oldest is 5 and she still doesn't like Santa.
I have a neighbor that Home Schools his 5 or 6 kids. Every summer the little brats bring a wagon full of veggies from their garden around the block to sell. Sometimes I just want to take one of those mangy looking zucchinis and beat 3 of them senseless with it. Anyway...they fucking carol...like full family on my doorstep singing music.....seriously this is America, start hating your neighbors like everyone else.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-12-22 12:48:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA that story was great!
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-12-22 12:47:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-12-22 12:24:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-12-22 17:20:15 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:13:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What a sensational, brilliant post.
Haha. Those Santas look stressed the fuck out.
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Wouldn't you be? *shudder*
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Indeed. Now I know why every Christmas movie Santa is a cursing, stinking, swearing drunk.
____________________________________
For real. Kids are... how do I put this delicately... "challenging." This morning, I overheard my co-worker who sits right behind me fussing at her 6-year-old son on the phone. This is not unusual, as boys of his age tend to be sneaky and all-around little terrorists. But the horrified tone in her voice made me curious, and I asked her if everything was OK after she hung up. Turns out she was flipping through the photos stored on her cell phone, and she ran across some that he had taken of his ass and six-year-old junk. As in amateur-porno-style closeups. I wanted to sympathize with her, and tell her boys will be boys, etc. etc., but God help me all I could do was laugh until I cried. I just hope he didn't figure out how to send the pictures out via text message.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-12-22 12:43:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
There are some creepy ass Santas there. In fact, it's fair to say the last time I was this freaked out was when I heard Shlongy's singing voice.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-12-22 12:37:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'll probably end up writing a post about this sometime (bitch therapy), but I've had my hearing tested and it's official, I've lost a percentage of my hearing because of children screaming in my ear.
I was a phlebotomist and needle jockey for 10+ years. Let's see, I drew an average of 2-3 children per day x let's say, 11.5 years. Since my head was close to them and taking into account their physical position to me, their mouths were 3 to 4 inches away from my ear.
Little kids can scream ridiculously loud and at a pitch and timbre that rattles your eardrum.
Every day, every week, every year for many years my eardrums were subjected to these piercing screams.
I have trouble hearing stuff at certain ranges. I finally went and had my hearing tested and sho'nuff, I have some hearing loss.
'Lil beasties.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-12-22 12:32:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I went completely ape shit last night due to long running, pent up frustration and unleashed it upon this ugly shelf we have that holds DVDs, VHSs and what not.
I regret nothing as it was an ugly shelf and I feel much, much better.
I just thought you should know.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-12-22 12:24:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-12-22 17:20:15 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:13:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What a sensational, brilliant post.
Haha. Those Santas look stressed the fuck out.
------------------
Wouldn't you be? *shudder*
~~~~~~~~
Indeed. Now I know why every Christmas movie Santa is a cursing, stinking, swearing drunk.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-12-22 12:20:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:13:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What a sensational, brilliant post.
Haha. Those Santas look stressed the fuck out.
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Wouldn't you be? *shudder*
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:56:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:50:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I wasn't scared of Santa when I was little.
My 18 month granddaughter sat on Santa's lap last week, giggling and poking him in the nose.
Great post.
B@W
Submitted by freebie (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:47:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
have a +2 for saving me the work of compiling these off ebaums world
Submitted by rubbermaid (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:44:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I smiled at a few.
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:34:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Tomorrow me and the kid go to see santa. I'm bringing the camera. I don't want to miss it if she makes one of these faces.
Submitted by Dexter-Brown (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:33:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
B@W worthy with intro and more commentary
Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:27:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Future goth kid got an audible chuckle out of me.
"What do you want for Christmas Sally?"
"A soul full a blackness. A heart of decay. And a gift card to Hot Topic."
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:20:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually, I've always thought this was a somewhat sadistic thing to do to your kids.
Good thing kids are resilient.
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:17:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Resentment and guilt.... the second and third best excuses for drinking.
Getting drunk is the best excuse.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:17:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I've kidnapped most of the humiliating photos of myself. My mother and I are at odds about that.
I've assured her they are safe, just out of her hands.
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:16:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this is quite possibly the best post i have ever seen on this site. I am forwarding it to people.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:16:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i like how pedo santa had the most calm (calmest?) baby.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:13:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What a sensational, brilliant post.
Haha. Those Santas look stressed the fuck out.
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:13:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
how could this not get a +2?
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2008-12-22 11:11:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
babies needed hangers