Awesome. Damn Near Died. (1914 hits)
Category: Science & EnvironmentalRating: 0.41 on 201 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Director (View user info) at 2008-07-23 16:48:11 EDT
Stung in the eyeball by a hornet today. EYEBALL not eyelid or eyebrow.
Only thing in the world I'm allergic to, apparently. Allergic enough to die. Bees, wasps & hornets. Ex spouse bitch whore slut cunt raced me to hospital. Funny because I just had to do the same thing for her two weeks ago.
Head was size of balloon.
I'm junked up with EpiPen. Feeling kinda funky. Heart is beating about 100 bizjillion miles per hour.
Howzabout some candles and mellow music to help me chill darlings?
I did not know that hornets don't leave a stinger. Thank fuck for that.
Oh, I got a super cool bitchin' sweet black eyepatch to wear for the next few days. How cool is that?
Sorry I didn't die Beano/Sphagnum/Shlongy/anyone else who is sad and/or stupid enough to wish death on another human being.
I'll try harder next time.
User Reviews
Submitted by TheBrad (user info) at 2008-07-27 06:08:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2008-07-24 15:46:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
EpiPen?
Get yourself a fresh adrenal gland to suck on.
===========================================================================
+2 for the fear&loathing dr.gonzo quote.
Submitted by TheBrad (user info) at 2008-07-27 06:08:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2008-07-24 15:46:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
EpiPen?
Get yourself a fresh adrenal gland to suck on.
===========================================================================
+2 for the fear&loathing dr.gonzo quote.
Submitted by TheBrad (user info) at 2008-07-27 06:08:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2008-07-24 15:46:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
EpiPen?
Get yourself a fresh adrenal gland to suck on.
===========================================================================
+2 for the fear&loathing dr.gonzo quote.
Submitted by TheBrad (user info) at 2008-07-27 06:08:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2008-07-24 15:46:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
EpiPen?
Get yourself a fresh adrenal gland to suck on.
===========================================================================
+2 for the fear&loathing dr.gonzo quote.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-07-27 00:32:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
What the fuck did you do in a previous life that was so bad?
Submitted by Skware (user info) at 2008-07-25 07:27:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2008-07-25 01:14:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
POST A PIC!!
Submitted by KirillovianShitStain (user info) at 2008-07-24 16:56:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What did it look like?
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2008-07-24 15:46:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
EpiPen?
Get yourself a fresh adrenal gland to suck on.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-24 13:36:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by precision (user info) at 2008-07-24 10:20:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Holy shit. Now I have a NEW Phobia. I can not imagine getting stung in the EYE! thats worse than when a friend of mine got shot in the right nut with an air stapler. Damn...just...damn.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My left nut just shrunk a little bit.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 12:44:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by kefer (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:47:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You sound scary.
===========================
You sound like toolpouch. I mean fatface. I mean jowly-jawls. I mean beano.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 12:21:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-07-24 10:08:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I love how even a hornet sting TO THE EYE won't keep you from posting on Ubersite.
========================================================================================
You're a fine one to talk, O.
Submitted by precision (user info) at 2008-07-24 10:20:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Holy shit. Now I have a NEW Phobia. I can not imagine getting stung in the EYE! thats worse than when a friend of mine got shot in the right nut with an air stapler. Damn...just...damn.
Submitted by Ejryuu (user info) at 2008-07-24 10:13:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Should've punched it in the FACE!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-07-24 10:08:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've never been stung before.
Neither has my aunt. Must run in the family.
I love how even a hornet sting TO THE EYE won't keep you from posting on Ubersite.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2008-07-24 09:34:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I was looking at gay pirates today for ungay reasons. This was oddly linked to my activities which I will say links us on some cosmic level.
I don't think gay pirates wear eye patches. Isn't that something?
here you go stupid I made you this thing.... http://glovestudio.com/squatsquat/wp-content/photos/snake_pliskin.jpg
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-24 08:18:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:41:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for eyepatch.
I'm getting me an eyepatch in a couple of weeks. Going into hospital to have a lump BURNED out of the inside of my eyelid.
Joy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
That's disgusting and no one needed to know that. Even though I may or may not have a huge resulting boner.
Submitted by kefer (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:47:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You sound scary.
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:41:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for eyepatch.
I'm getting me an eyepatch in a couple of weeks. Going into hospital to have a lump BURNED out of the inside of my eyelid.
Joy.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:30:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No you won't fatface. I mean toolpouch. I mean beano.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:28:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:24:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I mentioned you in this post
---------------
Thank you. I think we have established the sad stalker type.
See you around Jason.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:24:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I mentioned you in this post because I knew you'd pop up, quickly and because I wanted to save you the trouble of expressing your sadness that I did not, this time, die. Go to ANY of my posts, and boom, there you are, sometimes instantly.
And sure enough, you bit on this one too.
Yeah my ratings are so important to me. So important, in fact, that I use alters to reup them whenever a toolpouch cuts them in half.
Oh wait, that's right. I never did that. Someone else did though. Not sure but I think his name was toolpouch I mean beano.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:19:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Quck question for you Jason.
You know.. man to man.
All this bitching that you are doing about me jumping on this post really reallyy quickly etc and son on...
who mentioned who WITHIN this post?
Hence, who mentioned who FIRST?
Please, just answer the question if you are man enough to.
I'll even give you a zero because I know how much your rating mean to you.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:15:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah. I'd laugh or something toolpouch, but you're just not funny.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:13:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
report away jowel face.
I'm for a while now, toolpouch. Carry on.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:13:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
i HAVE SAVED THE url TO THIS MESSAGE AND CACHED A COPY BECAUSE OF THE CLEAR AND DIRECT THREATS YOU MAKE ON MY FAMILY.
I FEEL I AM IN PHYSICAL DANGER.
PLEASE PLEASE JUST LEAVE ME ALONE.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:12:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
TO THE INTERNET POLISS.
THEY MEAN SERIOUS BUSINESS.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:11:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
YOU ARE ONE MORE THREAT AWAY FROM BEING REPORTED.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:11:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:08:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
OK Jason, this stalking is becoming unfunny.
I now feel threatened. My family are in danger.
Please do not direct any more comments to towards me, or I am afraid I might have to infor the EFF BEE EYE or some shit.
Seriosuly man, you need to look at yourself in the mirror.
YOU SCARE ME.
==============
hahahaha. Sad little man. Your family is in no danger from me. I avoid stink like that.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:10:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
*dances a happy jig and sings a happy song*
IS TAKING CANDY FROM A BABY WRONG?
BECAUSE IF IT IS... I DON'T WANNA BE RIGHT ... WOOHOO
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:09:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And stop using my name. That's reserved for the human race. When you use it, it gives me the creeps. All I can think of is that jowly jiggling face and those nostril flaring when you use my name, and it makes me violently ill.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:08:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
OK Jason, this stalking is becoming unfunny.
I now feel threatened. My family are in danger.
Please do not direct any more comments to towards me, or I am afraid I might have to infor the EFF BEE EYE or some shit.
Seriosuly man, you need to look at yourself in the mirror.
YOU SCARE ME.
BART... HE SCARES ME.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:06:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
OK Jason, when you post it goes on THE FRONT PAGE... RIGHT AT THE TOP.
Kinda makes it easy to find... oh, it also says DIRECTOR right by it.
Sorry, don't flatter youself honey.
Now, you seem to be getting all het up, and again... you are getting into the realms of abuse and threats...all of which I know you don't indulge in BECASUE YOU SAY YOU DON'T.
Have a Whisky, large or course, man... even the whole bottle.
Calm the fuck down and GO OUTSIDE.
lols.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:06:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-06-26 04:05:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You are a pathetic excuse of a human being and this post highlights your desperate need for attention.
Didn't you claim to be giving Uber a break for a while?
You've posted twice since then.
You are and always will be a useless cunt who fails at everything he does.
Why won't you just accept this concept and drown yourself in a large bottle of Buffalo Trace?
I shouldn't take so much pleasure in your demise, but you are such a pathetic, whiny, I'm so hard done by, it's never my fault, I'll blame it all on the drink shit for brains, that I make a huge exception in your case.
Christ! I have had my favourite (and until it was banned ONLY) account banished to the Bart naughty step because I somehow caught your attention and set you off on a one man crusade to do me 'e-damage' (as you so succinctly put it).
You have threatened me and wished death on my wife and baby son (very brave Jason... insulting a 10 month old boy).
Stay around Uber... watching you go into meltdown, going back to jail for your regular ass attention, then coming back here with your bravado "I've been to jail" shit will just MAKE MY DAY.
Beano.
====================================
HAHAHAHAHAHA.
*I'm* riled up.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Go die. Hopefully then the anti-christ and the yak will starve to death, ridding the world of any chance of your blood line continuing, and preventing the end of times.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 05:01:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm riled up. Totally. You can tell by the way I pounce on your every post within minutes of you posting it. You know it's been over a month since I last posted but when I did two or three days ago, THERE YOU WERE, just like I knew you would be.
You are sad. Even people from your own shitty little island can't stand you. No wonder you want to move here; even those toothless fucks can't stand you.
I would love to actually meet you in person. You are a coward.
Why don't you go and try to convince the yak to let you fuck her? All it'll probably take is some honey coated oats and a few grains for texture. Next thing you know, you'll be slamming it YAK STYLE! Just try to keep the shit coated tail out of your face this time.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 04:56:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
hahahaha
proff?!?
LOL
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 04:55:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
ubmitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 04:53:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're so pathetic. You actually stepped over the line when you put up members of my family on the Uberboard. As far as me looking up your repulsive camwhore, go ahead and call the police toolpouch.
---------------
again SLIMEBUCKET.... PRODUCE YOUR PROFF OR stfu.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 04:54:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Proof Jason.
This thing we have in the real world.
Without it you are just another whiny shitbag who can't handle a website.
GO OUTSIDE
GET LAID - I know... I know... BUT IT MIGHT HAPPEN.
OH LOOK EVERYBODY..... BEANO DID THIS...AND BEANO DID THAT!!! i'M GONNA ACCUSE HIM OF ALL SORT... PROFF? NOT A BEAN (EXCUSE THE PUN) OF IT... BUT IT HAPPENED BECAUSE I SAID SO!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
mAN I LOVE TO RILE YOU UP YOU WEAK MOTHERFUCKER.
YOU. ARE. TOO. EASY.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 04:53:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're so pathetic. You actually stepped over the line when you put up members of my family on the Uberboard. As far as me looking up your repulsive camwhore, go ahead and call the police toolpouch.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 04:51:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
WOAH.... bookmarking my posts.
Man... you better back the fuck up or else all CALL TEH POLISS LIKE A COMPLETE GIRLY GIRLY!!
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 04:50:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
As it was you hit people that I no longer have any dealings with, and I doubt they know what ubersite is, so I let it slide.
---------------
I hit?
LOL@THE RETARD.
=======================
I realize you're too stupid to grasp the meaning of that simple statement but please try to keep up.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 04:41:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
* that'd
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 04:40:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Seriously man. Those nostrils make you look like a pig that's been bled dry.
How your yak can stand to fuck you is something that's stump Einstien, were he still alive.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 04:38:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Beano if you'd take cock outta your mouth long enough to concentrate on something else, you'd know that everyone knows those are your alters.
And though I'm not a redneck, I'd be willing to learn. Do they send you someplace special for that?
Yes, dipshit, hit, as in you actually found people I know in your wormlike attempts to either frighten or anger me by listing personal information.
Now, please go drive off a cliff with your "child" and yak in the car with you so the world is rid of your ilk.
And PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, don't move to my country. We have enough problems as it is. You coming here would only add one more fat, ugly, pasty dipshit to the gene pool and Jesus Sweet Lord above knows we don't need more of THIS here: http://www.ubersite.com/m/108585
<shudders in horror>
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 04:26:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:09:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Again, show me where I threatened you, or your family, or encouraged you to commit suicide. I'm waiting.
Also, proof is in the pudding sweet-tits and I'm pretty sure it's traceable to find who posts something on the uberboard. There was no threat. It was a statement of fact. If you'd come any closer to home I would have consulted an attorney immediatly. As it was you hit people that I no longer have any dealings with, and I doubt they know what ubersite is, so I let it slide.
---------------
I hit?
LOL@THE RETARD.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-24 04:24:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:26:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Beano is:
myshit, aster, maf54, silverbolt, tljohnsen, and several other alters I can't think of right now.
He's a sad sad little big man.
---------------
HAHHAHAH I love how everyone just lists the people who have -2'd them when they want to assign an alter to me !
Get over yourself redneck.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-07-24 03:31:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
who woulda thunk you would have come on uber with a hornet in your eye
i prefer a 99
This DID make me smile
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2008-07-24 02:19:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:57:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
How do you keep coming up with all these different girlfriends, Unabonger? I mean sweet jesus you're a broke alcoholic.
In my experience that kinda scares the girls away.
________
I dunno, I think I have a winner here...she knows I'm a broke alcoholic but she loves me anyway.
actually I drink much less these days so I guess you and I are both doing better.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 01:12:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Didn't we have a mouthfucking agreement? Maybe that was Banjo. I dunno. Anyway, you're obligated to mouthfuck me now. I helped you with your paint project. And I don't take cash, credit, checks or American express.
Like I said; August 15th deadline, Ching Chong dearie.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-24 00:50:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Whoa oops. Whoa, when did this mouthfucking get started? Where was I?
Submitted by frankthebear (user info) at 2008-07-24 00:43:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hornets suck, but so do forks
http://www.navajokid.com/dunn/images/leaf.jpg
just ask Dunn
(p.s. watch Haggard, good movie)
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 00:42:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hey what's with the -2? I thought we had a mouth fucking relationship going!
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-24 00:33:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
haha, I'm nerdy as shit, too. But, jesus. How's your eye, Turbo?
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:58:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not at all. You can call me a Cracker if you want. I'm white, nerdy and proud!
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:54:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Is that bad I actually laughed at that???
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:49:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Damnit Apollo! I am too real! Don't you remember our week together!? Don't you remember OUR LOVE?!?!
<sob>
===============
I'm sure it'll be fine there, Ching Chong.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:40:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thankee. I don't know, I feel like it should be funny at least or something, but it's just blatant camwhoring in leui of a real quality post which I can't seem to shit out of my brown eye no matter how hard I squeeze.....Idk.
Haha, I like apollo.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:36:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:59:25 CDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You know, Apollo, it's not good form to go to someone's country, state even, and insult them that way. I mean, can you imagine if I went to Britain and insulted the locals wherever I went?
yes but you're not real
you're the internet
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:21:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
at the bottom of your paint page there is a little thing you can click with your mouse and pull down to expand the drawing.
I don't believe you're this ignorant, even if you are Sico.
In the future resize the canvase before you begin.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:18:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Obviously, but it has a face in it, too like at a carnival.
IS PAINT ONLY SO LONG? I just want to add 2 more things, but it's fucking cutting them off.....
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:15:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What picture?
The pirate?
Noooooo, that's not me. IT'S A PIRATE. A DRAWING OF A PIRATE. DO YOU NOT SEE THE ALIEN ON HIS SHOULDER?
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:15:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You know, Unabonger, I've been to San Francisco twice in my life. Once when I was a little kid, and once when I was 14. I stayed with my grandmother for two weeks there. I remember it very well. It was fucking beautiful. I remember The Cure was playing then, and, being a kid from rural Texas, I was blown away by the freeks and geeks standing in line to see them.
I don't think Experima liked it much when she was there, but she had some rather odd experiences.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:15:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sick. Seriously, where the fuck did you get that picture? Is that you???
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:12:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Nah my orbs ain't gooey.
My knob, on the other hand...
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:11:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha, I am really making the to-be worst-of-uber as we speak.
I know you're excited, what with your one eye and other gooey orb.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:09:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well cool. I'm a broke alcoholic too, so come on up here and fuck my brains out.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 23:04:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Broke alcoholics are the best kind. Shows dedication and perseverance. When I've got that fifth kid popped out, I know he'll still be there, wasting quarters on OE instead of pampers.
It's consistent, though. what else more could a girl ask for?
yeah, they were like brand spakin' new in 6th grade (I don't know, relatively, anyway)
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:59:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You know, Apollo, it's not good form to go to someone's country, state even, and insult them that way. I mean, can you imagine if I went to Britain and insulted the locals wherever I went?
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:57:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
How do you keep coming up with all these different girlfriends, Unabonger? I mean sweet jesus you're a broke alcoholic.
In my experience that kinda scares the girls away.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:54:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Apollo! Where did our love go buddy?!?!? I mean jesus holmes! You were keeping your eyes peeled for me down there not so long ago.
WHAT HAPPENED MAAAAAN. WHERE DID I GO WRONG?!?!?!?!?
You miss me, right? That's it. You miss my sweet caress.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:49:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
'near'
:(
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:43:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bay Area, in Pacifica. I've been sitting around on uber all fucking day cause my girl's out of town and my friends are all working.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:31:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hahaha. Buying beer with quarters. Sweet. If I still drank I'd be doing that too.
Yeah it's pretty out there. I went to boot camp there. Where are you?
=====================
MS Paint in 6th grade. Jesus.
Not that I really remember 6th grade, but we sure as fuck didn't have computers in school then.
Much less MS Paint.
I learned computer shit at work.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:28:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh you know, California...pretty country. I'm broke as FUCK but I have a nice view. I just paid for a beer with quarters at the Quik Stop.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:20:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
lol well i'm going crazy making a huge camwhore, i'm bored and it has a pic of a chin, so yayayyaaay
I've never really used paint, the last time I can honestly remember was in sixth grade after we had to code a maze for the computer.
Crazy. I usually use photoshop, not mspaint.
Assholes
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:02:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That was harsh, but fair. Consolation prize is I am a believer, you are not sico.
================
Yeah, same here. I think this broad is fo real, yo.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:02:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-24 02:57:27 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow.
Can you help me out? How the fuck do I put more than one picture on something I can upload? I tried using paint, but it opens in a new window. And, it's not my comp, so I'm not fucking downloading anything (people get retarded about that shit).....
Please help me, piratedirector.
--------------
Jesus wept. There should be a PC using dum fuck test before you're ever allowed to own one...
That was harsh, but fair. Consolation prize is I am a believer, you are not sico.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:00:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You can do it in paint. Open two paint windows. On one, open a blank page. On the other, open your photograph or image. Crop it, then paste it onto the other paint window blank page. Go back to the second paint window, open a new image, crop/copy again, paste into first window, and so on.
Save the first paint window collage as a jpeg and presto violla, you're good to go.
I don't think you're serious though. Nobody as young as you purport to be is incapable of such a simple task.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:57:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow.
Can you help me out? How the fuck do I put more than one picture on something I can upload? I tried using paint, but it opens in a new window. And, it's not my comp, so I'm not fucking downloading anything (people get retarded about that shit).....
Please help me, piratedirector.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:55:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Allowing what to happen?
You really need help with your engrish.
Anyway she's not stupid. She speaks a shitload of languages and has a nice car and a nice house and a nice job and so on.
She's just a religious nut. Nothing wrong with that as long as you don't push the shit onto me, which she doesn't.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:52:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:48:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's ok. I have a Chinese ex-girlfriend. We still get along great. But I can never understand a fucking word that bitch says. And when I DO manage to understand her, it doesn't make any sense, what she's saying.
Or worse, when I do understand, she's usually talking about God, or Orlando Bloom, or Jesus, or she wants to play Christian music. Not even Christian rock, but that mellow shit.
*sigh*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I hope you're fucking kidding; I dont know why you'd date someone that fucking stupid...
That's just sad. I hate women; but I hate men for allowing this shit to happen, too.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:48:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's ok. I have a Chinese ex-girlfriend. We still get along great. But I can never understand a fucking word that bitch says. And when I DO manage to understand her, it doesn't make any sense, what she's saying.
Or worse, when I do understand, she's usually talking about God, or Orlando Bloom, or Jesus, or she wants to play Christian music. Not even Christian rock, but that mellow shit.
*sigh*
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:41:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, I know that didn't make a damned bit of sense, either.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:40:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*sniffles
*rolls away on awesome roller skates...
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:39:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
There you go again Taters, not making one damn bit of sense.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:38:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That's what SHE said.
Harddeehar har
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:34:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-24 02:26:33 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
I didn't know you were a damn brit.
-----------------
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-24 02:26:31 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Well that explains it. I wondered why you'd be up so late.
I'm not sure if I want to picture you sitting in your knickers or not.
Is that a good image to have in my mind? Or will it scar me for life, much like my horrific childhood?
--------------
Yar tatters, I am from the Great Isle of Britain.
And of course its a nice sight. One day I will post a nice pic and not the circlejerk shit I've posted to date. I am not a cretin.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:32:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well then prove you're not him. Camwhore again, holding an "I <3 Uber" sign or something.
Or bare assed nakkie. Either way works for me.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:30:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What fucking picture is that anyway?
I can't believe I am getting mistaken for a retard wigger (redundant I know)
Yeah, I didn't want to put a comma there, fuck
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:30:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks Bonger. How's California Dreamin' treating you?
Submitted by Zax (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:30:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
YO WTF?!?
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:27:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sweet fucking Jesus on rubber crutches, the eyeball?
ouch, man. at least you get to say "GARR!!" to everyone you meet.
feel better.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:26:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I didn't know you were a damn brit.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:26:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well that explains it. I wondered why you'd be up so late.
I'm not sure if I want to picture you sitting in your knickers or not.
Is that a good image to have in my mind? Or will it scar me for life, much like my horrific childhood?
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:23:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Watery brain... Its 2.20 am, yet again I can't get to frigging sleep. This will not do. Its the UK no less. No less... Its the North of bloody Scotland and its like the Amazon! I'm sat in my nowt but my underwear and I'm still roasting.
What is going on Mother Earth! I am not built for this weather. I am a Northerner, I like harsh winds and horizontal rain...!
Oh for a watery brain right now.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:20:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
haha. wow. i don't even know what to say to that.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:18:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No. I took the eye patch off. I'm squinting though. My head is still kinda puffy. I look like I have water on the brain.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:15:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
so you're typing out of one eye?
You're hardcore dude.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:14:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's true. I've never mouthfucked anybody.
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-23 21:11:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Whatever turns you on. You don't look like the mouthfucking type though... I think its all talk.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 20:55:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I know! And I should get a sympathy mouthfuck from you, right?
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-23 20:51:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 hornet in the eye. Those things are terrifying.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-07-23 20:43:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Ouchy
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-07-23 20:22:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Vote for Drake to turn this to your financial advantage.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/117737#2748412
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 20:03:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Shpagnum you old salty dog!
I WANNA FUCK YOU IN THE BUTT!
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:56:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Sounds like mother nature failed!
Hopefully, she will be back to finish the job sooner rather than later.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:23:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've never even heard of that...
wow.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:16:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Nah, I don't NEED porn. Not at my age. I was just kind of flabbergasted by that site. I used to know someone who used to work in the porn industry and that person never mentioned that website before.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:14:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
taterhole- Porn, we have plenty of.
YOU? Not enough of.
BREAK OUT!
Dinner time....
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:13:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're sick... you need porn. go get porn.
haha, a Taterhole. hehehhe
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:13:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hey Shlongy I just checked this out.
http://video.xnxx.com./
Jesus.
<digs out lotion>
<drops trou>
<jerks off for the next 25 years>
Been nice knowing ya'll.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:11:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'd be happy to supply you with many +2's for a tit/hole shot, taters.
Either/or.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:10:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I had to look up DJ Qualls or whoever.
Ha ha. I'm thin but dude. I don't know how that guy is still alive.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:09:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What "that" asian girl are you referring to?
That candycane of ...something stereotypically asian?
I don't think I'll be posting more pics. Maybe. Who knows. It's the only thing that can get over -0-, but still not a 1
:(
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:08:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Tater-tard examples...just from THIS post alone:
Yeah, you are is stupid. I fucking amaze myself sometimes.
You're face is shit. Yeah, I'm five.
Wait a fucking minute...am I toolpouch? Are you saying I have alters? I clearly can't write for siht, why would I do it with more than one log-in. Which is saved cuz I can't be bothered to remember passwords. And I didn't mean to -2 you, but I thought they didn't count after the first one anyway
I just like to make shit up and be a total toolbag. (Screwdrivers and all, god I love my liquor)
But holy FUCKING HELL.
I'd make him come to the office and play video games with me all night.
Shit, I mean, something not nerdy....
I don't know what most of this is supposed to mean...And that's even IN context.
Doesn't mean I wouldn't bend her over and "do the hustle".
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:05:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm surprised that's all you are allergic to. You look as rugged as DJ Qualls.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:02:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well if you're really that asian girl, be happy in the knowledge that I would gladly cum in your ear.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:02:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I think they're ALL sico.
Now, I only spank to THIS:
http://video.xnxx.com./
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:01:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're both idiots.
Idiots. Yeah, wow, teenager kind of shit, aye?
I'd almost be offended, then again, you slapped your own ass and had your grandkid take a picture of it.
Yeah, you are is stupid. I fucking amaze myself sometimes.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 19:00:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OMG THANKS A LOT SHLONGY NOW I CAN NEVER PLEASURE MYSELF TO THE IMAGE OF THAT LOVELY ASIAN BEAVER BECAUSE A LARGE LIPPED WIGGER WILL CONTINUALLY POP UP IN MY MIND.
IN FACT I THINK YOU'VE PUT ME OFF ASIAN BEAVER FOR LIFE, ASSHOLE!
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:59:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I think "she" could be sico.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:58:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well if that's really her, I'd certainly ejaculate pretty much anywhere on her.
If it's not her, I'd still ejaculate pretty much anywhere on whoever that really is, so no harm no foul, knowwutimsayinyo?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:56:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
That's the risk you take if you decide to rub one out to "her" picture.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:56:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yeah- but it could be sico again, too.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:55:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Did she camwhore somewhere? I guess I'd better go look.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:54:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I can't decide about this tatersninja "alter".
Once in a while she's almost funny...the rest of the time she 'speaks' in kind of a dumbass teenager-style jibberish that makes me want to slap her silly.
The other 3% of the time, I just want to force feed her Shlongy Jr.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:51:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Darn Shlongy. You mean we're not pals? I always thought we were kind of affable, in a "I hate you" kind of way.
:-(
I don't know anything about Asia. Never been there. Some hot broads though.
Some ass ugly ones, too, for that matter.
Just like everywhere else in the world.
My are face is shit?
Asian or not, you better pick up the proper grammer pronto, bitch, or I will kill you.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:48:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:38:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I had an Asian fiance once. She didn't smoke, so your argument is shit. No one to blame but yourself, sugarwalls.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You're seriously going to use ONE instance to try and dissuade me from the ample knowledge that in asia, the asians smoke a ton of fags....No, no no.
You're face is shit. Yeah, I'm five.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:48:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
NO WONDER WE'RE SUCH GOOD CHUMS
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:46:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hey Shlongy we have that in common too! Mine was Vietnamese, but she was raised in Switzerland by a white family, since, *ahem* we (americans) killed her entire family and orphaned her.
So, We're both Jewish...
Oh, wait. No we're not.
Um. I know! We're both rich!
Oh, wait. Not that either.
Um. I know! We were both in shit punk bands that never took off!
Oh wait. Strike 3.
Um. I know! We're both old!
YEAH! YEAH BABY, YEAH!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:43:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Nice spell job on "beautifully".
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:42:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Got stung on the lid last week by a yellow jacket.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:41:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
My Vietnamese girlfriend back in the day used to smoke..and she smoked my pole beuautifully too, I might add.
She was also a smokin' piece of ass.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:38:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I had an Asian fiance once. She didn't smoke, so your argument is shit. No one to blame but yourself, sugarwalls.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:35:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I would say I really do care; but only because it's aggravating. And then I remember, it's a fucking website...and I smoke my cancer sticks and I'm happy again... (Asians SMOKE A LOT, so I blame it on them)
I had an intellivoice...or intellivision, i couldn't be bothered to read, i was throwin' down.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:31:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I like video games too. Specially the oldies from the 80's and 90's.
I don't know if you're an alter or not and I really don't care as long as you play nice and don't hog all the toys.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:29:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HOLY SHIT!!
NO wonder people kept thinkgin I'm a fucking alter, a lot (like 5 out of the 7 users on here) still think I am. It's fucking retarded.
What's the point of having these alters?
I like vid games. I'm a fucking geek. so sue me.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:26:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Beano is:
myshit, aster, maf54, silverbolt, tljohnsen, and several other alters I can't think of right now.
He's a sad sad little big man.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:24:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Who's beano?
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:15:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Make who play video games with me all night?
BEANO?
FUUUUUUUUUCK THAT.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:13:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd make him come to the office and play video games with me all night.
Shit, I mean, something not nerdy....
I mean, if I were you.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:09:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Again, show me where I threatened you, or your family, or encouraged you to commit suicide. I'm waiting.
Also, proof is in the pudding sweet-tits and I'm pretty sure it's traceable to find who posts something on the uberboard. There was no threat. It was a statement of fact. If you'd come any closer to home I would have consulted an attorney immediatly. As it was you hit people that I no longer have any dealings with, and I doubt they know what ubersite is, so I let it slide.
==============
I was painting a garage for a friend.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:04:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:00:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Also, toolpouch, I never did and never would post personal information on a forumn like this about your family members (i.e., names, etc.). You did. That's wrong. If you'd gotten any closer to home I would have seen what I could have done to you legally, if anything.
----------
Empty threats, I just love em'
People are full of this 'you did some bad shit man' threats... when they have no proof what-so-ever.
I never posted shit about you... YOU on the other hand dedicated SEVERAL post to me and about me, encouraging me, no less, to commit suicide.
Man you are sad.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:03:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So...not to be TOO dense, but what the fuck were you painting while at work if you do internet marketing, publishing, and those two other things you said?
It's funny how something that fucking small can fuck up your whole day
O, and sorry about your poorly-reflexed eye.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 18:00:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Also, toolpouch, I never did and never would post personal information on a forumn like this about your family members (i.e., names, etc.). You did. That's wrong. If you'd gotten any closer to home I would have seen what I could have done to you legally, if anything.
====================
Taters, several of my friends and I have an office. It's a small affair and it's kind of communal. It's internet marketing, research, development and publishing. There's a nice comfy sofa and a big screen T.V. with all the channels and shit, so when I don't want to go home I stay here.
Submitted by BobSandwich (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:56:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So that is like a yellow jacket, good thing it wasn't the big hornet. Sucker could have deflated yoru brain or some crazy shit like that.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:53:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're sleeping at the fucking office?
If not too intrusive, what the hell do you do that you're ok with being there overnight?
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:50:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not driving home. I'm crashing here tonight.
Beano:
"When YOU threaten me, my family AND wish death on my wife and baby son... it's all just a joke and you don't really mean it."
Please point out to me where I did that. I want to see it.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:49:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:44:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not banging on about anything, toolpouch. I just feel sorry for you is all.
------------
Last comment.
When YOU threaten me, my family AND wish death on my wife and baby son... it's all just a joke and you don't really mean it.
When I call you a cunt, I'm carrying around all the hatred in the world??
LOL@YOU.
Whoever owns the brian blessed alter is going through my Beano user minus 2ing it, that you make you happy.
You did that once too.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:48:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're at the office BY YOURSELF with a fucking eyepatch on....
Couldn't you just go home for the day or something?
I'm sorry, that's the second funniest thing I've heard today.
How are you driving home, Turbo???
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:44:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I mean bald-faced hornet.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:44:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not banging on about anything, toolpouch. I just feel sorry for you is all.
I'd post a camwhore Haikoo but I
1) don't have a camera and
2) don't have anyone to take the picture for me. I'm at my office and there's no one else here.
Submitted by BobSandwich (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:43:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
By hornet do you mean yellow jacket or an acutal hornet, like the one that is nearly as big as your finger?
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:42:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I used to enjoy trapping wasps with paint when I used to paint houses.
Normally I don't destroy insects on their own turf, but they were bothering me.
Why do I have to look at a stupid camwhore of you with soup on your head, but when you have a kick ass injury and an eye patch, you hold out?
I should -2 you just for that.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:41:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I have no idea what you are banging on about Jason.
How you got to that conclusion because of a few minus 2's I'll never know.
Says a lot about you I guess.
Now, please refrain from addressing me and please don't keep backtracking, you look like a wimp.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:40:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't know, it just seems odd you have such poor reflexes.
Submitted by The-Armed-Samurai (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:39:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:38:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Beano: How does it feel to carry around so much hate? I don't really hate you. How could I? Why would I? I've never met you. I know nothing about you. I poke jokes about your Yak and the Anti-Christ but if you think I'm serious about that you're outta your mind.
But you really mean it. You're truly filled with hate. That must be a miserable way to live. I really do pity you.
Sorry man. Wish things weren't so awful for you.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:37:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:35:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:27:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You I don't know, unless you're one of his alters, in which case yes, you are a toolpouch.
-----------------------
YAWN
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
IRONIC
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:35:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:27:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You I don't know, unless you're one of his alters, in which case yes, you are a toolpouch.
-----------------------
YAWN
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:35:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's not hard to comprehend, people. I was painting. I set up a ladder in a new area. I must have banged the nest which I didn't see with the top of the ladder. I climbed the ladder. I dipped my paintbrush. I turned around to begin painting.
BAM.
WHAT IS SO FUCKING DIFFICULT TO UNDERSTAND?
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:32:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:08:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
does anyone actually get along on here?
I just like to make shit up and be a total toolbag. (Screwdrivers and all, god I love my liquor)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
No, I wrote this, so didn't know what the fuck you were talkin' about.
Seriously, how did you get stung in the FUCKING EYE???
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:27:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't know who you are, Taters. You must be new. I was talking to Beano. HE'S a toolpouch.
You I don't know, unless you're one of his alters, in which case yes, you are a toolpouch.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:26:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait a fucking minute...am I toolpouch? Are you saying I have alters? I clearly can't write for siht, why would I do it with more than one log-in. Which is saved cuz I can't be bothered to remember passwords. And I didn't mean to -2 you, but I thought they didn't count after the first one anyway
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:23:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:19:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Still alive JH?
Cunt.
==========
Nuuuuur, dipshit. Which alter will you -2 me with next? I'm guessing maf52 or whatever that one was. Or Aster? Perhaps silverbolt?
You have no idea how sad you are, do you toolpouch?
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:21:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:19:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"I'm allergic to eggs"....
BUHAHAHAHAHAHAaaaaaaaaa cough ahahahahahaah
I'm allergic to bad beaver.
_________________
Considering who you've pledged to spend your whole life with, I'll bet you're constantly breaking out in hives.
Submitted by TiddlyWinks (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:21:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ive never met a beaver b4. How did u find out u were allergic 2 a beaver?
is n e 1 going to tell me where my post went? i didnt save it and i wanted to keep it.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:20:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Whatever, I can manage to read a couple of them. (I wish I was fucking kidding, but some of them read like a blinded tard-ape wrote them and then bashed out his left eye)
Fuckit. I've never written short shit before, so...
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:19:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"I'm allergic to eggs"....
BUHAHAHAHAHAHAaaaaaaaaa cough ahahahahahaah
I'm allergic to bad beaver.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:19:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Getting stung in the eye by a wasp? Yeah. Weak.
By a Hornet? Pure awesomeness.
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:19:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Still alive JH?
Cunt.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:18:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So does getting stung in the eye by a wasp.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:18:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, well, then avoid your own posts at all cost, toolpouch.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:18:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I hate when people "surrender" on some good, ol' fashioned Uber hate after just three or four reviews.
IT SHOWS WEAKNESS.
Submitted by no1hasdis (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:17:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm allergic to shitty posts. My eyeballs are swelling right now.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:16:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Aw, c'mon - I'm just yankin' yer chain. No need to get bent.
*smooch*
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:16:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Why do they have to be european? I thought they did that and still considered straight.
Do you have something to tell me, Shlongy????
It's okay, shh.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:16:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fuck that Shlongy. I called YOU a turdfucker first, long ago.
Shlongy and I have a relationship, in case ya'll didn't know.
Submitted by TiddlyWinks (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:15:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
u poor thing. i rate this one good because u were ill and that isnt nice. i dont think i like shlongy either and u seem not 2.
I hope ur eyeball gets better. im allergic to eggs but i just get sick, i dno't need to go to hospital or nothing.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:15:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You have no case, dickstain. You might have herpes, but no case.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:14:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
If you need an extra insult, I've been using "turdpusher" today with some pretty good success.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:14:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I accidentally disturbed an unseen nest with my back turned towards it, while on a ladder. Turned around and BAM. No time to react. No time to "close" my eye. It just happened.
------------------------------
I rest my case.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:12:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yozz. What's stupid about getting stung by a hornet? I accidentally disturbed an unseen nest with my back turned towards it, while on a ladder. Turned around and BAM. No time to react. No time to "close" my eye. It just happened. No more preventable than a fucking earthquake, you tit.
Also, Beano, I feel sorry for you. I was gonna call you a tool. But that didn't fit. Then I was gonna call you a toolbag, but toolbags everywhere just wouldn't have it.
You're gonna have to settle for toolpouch. It's the best I can offer.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:11:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Not really...except for the European circle-jerkers.
But if you email me some pictires of your snizz, we'll get along famously.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:10:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Taters, STFU
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:10:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
one post per day, n00b
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:08:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
does anyone actually get along on here?
I just like to make shit up and be a total toolbag. (Screwdrivers and all, god I love my liquor)
But holy FUCKING HELL.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:08:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Srsly, how fucking stoopid can one person get?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:06:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-07-23 22:05:21 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
CAMWHORE THAT SHIT.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Agreed.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:06:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
That's not true, oathmeal, you giant walking/talking pile of shit.
You follow me around Uber like Lassie followed Timmy and I don't like you.
YOUR THESIS HAS BEEN SHOT DOWN, LARDASS!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-07-23 17:05:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
CAMWHORE THAT SHIT.
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-07-23 16:59:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Shlongy likes anyone who pays him any attention.
That goes for elderly old women, too. Just ask his wife.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 16:57:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I like you, tatersninja.
Your Uber name?
Not so much.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 16:55:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Shlongy, stop having therapy via keyboard on other people's posts.
I spelled your name right, you can't be mad :D
Submitted by tloshjohnson (user info) at 2008-07-23 16:54:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck you, idiot
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-23 16:54:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Well, at least you made a friend in the hornet!
Now, you're up to "one friend".
Submitted by BobSandwich (user info) at 2008-07-23 16:53:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No seriously though, one time I cut my eyeball in football. Someone elses fingernail sliced that sucker deep, the doctor in town accidently perscribed me lidocaine to drop in it. I sympathise with your pain, go get you some lidocaine, dropping it is like 15 seconds of death then your face starts to melt and you have an orgasm.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2008-07-23 16:52:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Holy whistling arseholes!
I've never heard of something so grostesque.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-23 16:50:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Why didn't you just shut your eye???????
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2008-07-23 16:50:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You could have at least posted a picture.
Submitted by BobSandwich (user info) at 2008-07-23 16:50:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry I didn't die Beano/Sphagnum/Shlongy/anyone else who is sad and/or stupid enough to wish death on another human being.
I'll try harder next time.
============================
That's all we can ask of you.