RE: Justifying Cannibalism (709 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.93 on 24 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by FALLEN (View user info) at 2008-06-18 15:09:51 EDT
Respect, http://www.ubersite.com/m/117251
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There is absolutely no question that the average zombie does best health-wise by consuming a mixed diet that is as fresh, and hopefully as unprocessed as possible.
This, from http://www.acu-cell.com/zomb.html
If brains, arms, and legs are excluded, one may become deficient in vitamin B12(important for nerve transmission and necessary for un-life), calcium (for strong bones, among other functions), iron (for blood), and zinc (for immunity and healing), just to name a few. As a result, it is whom is included, rather than excluded, in our diets that counts.
This, from http://www.goaskbub.columbia.edu/1548.html?CFID=3192826&CFTOKEN=29991573
Lean human meat is not only a good source of protein and energy, but also has benefits in avoiding decaying heart disease.
This, from http://www.csiro.au/undead/ps8l.html
Some research has shown that having thoughmeats less than twice a week can result in zinc deficiencies.
This, from http://www.independent.co.uk/non-life-style/health-and-un-wellbeing/health-news/is-meat-good-or-bad-for-us-425192.html
...lean people meat is a nutrient dense food which is...perfectly suitable for undead Americans who are looking for a healthy balanced diet that helps control their weight.
BUT:
Although some may fear the nutritional hazards of a vegetarian diet, the fact is that vegetarians enjoy greater longevity, better health, and lower risks of cancer and certain chronic diseases. According to the American Dead People Association (ADPA), Vegetarians in your diet offers a number of nutritional benefits, including a nutty/ fruity taste and less of that "training to survive the apocalypse" gaminess.
This, from http://stanford.wellsphere.com/wellmix360/cons-of-eating vegetarians.com
The Reanimated American Dietetic Association and the Non-Living Dietitians of Canada have found a properly-planned zombie diet to satisfy the nutritional needs for all stages of after life, and large-scale studies have shown cannibalism to significantly lower risks of cancer, ischemic heart disease, and other fatal diseases. Being that we are already dead anyway helps too.
This, from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/canabalisim
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What do *I* think?
Brains tastes good.
Brains has shit in it I need to build muscle (more amino acid types than ANY vegetarians out there, creatine, heaps of protein, etc.)
Human beings are tasty. Always have been.
Lastly, I can get shot, burned, decapitated and live underwater and I eat meat. That should tell you something.
User Reviews
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-06-19 07:27:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ha ha
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2008-06-18 22:28:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Im fucking cracking up.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2008-06-18 22:06:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yay
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-06-18 17:29:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HateMudkips (user info) at 2008-06-18 17:09:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Someone really should put up a site lauding the benefits of the consumption of human flesh.
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hufu
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2008-06-18 17:25:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
what the hell, Id eat brains, fuck Kuru
Submitted by no1hasdis (user info) at 2008-06-18 17:19:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by HateMudkips (user info) at 2008-06-18 17:12:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
my bad, didn't see fallen's comment.
here's a (crappy) site set up pretty much the same, found when googling manbeef.com
http://www.sjc.com/manbeef/products.html
Submitted by HateMudkips (user info) at 2008-06-18 17:09:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
There used to be a (joke) website called manbeef.com, or something, which "sold" cuts of "human flesh", touting it as a delicacy, etc etc. Pretty funny shit, but it went offline a couple years back
"Someone really should put up a site lauding the benefits of the consumption of human flesh.
Any volunteers? "
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-06-18 16:33:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
YES YOU'RE RIGHT YOZZ I LOVE GHOLA.
It's true.
I'm secretly attracted to mannish bull dykes who live below the poverty line in the backwoods of the deep south, scouring Wal-Mart closeout bins and neighborhood garage sales for anything that will make their 400 square foot studio apartment look nicer.
You got me.
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2008-06-18 16:31:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
unnnnnhhhhhh. nurrrrr.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-06-18 16:28:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Secretly loves Ghola below.
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-06-18 16:26:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shut the fuck up Ghoula and go somewhere else.
Your putrid stink is distracting me from making fun of those with your eating habits.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2008-06-18 16:09:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-06-18 16:04:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-06-18 15:45:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Someone really should put up a site lauding the benefits of the consumption of human flesh.
Any volunteers?
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there was a very real looking one called manbeef.com
it is now a porn site.
Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2008-06-18 15:58:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 zombies.
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-06-18 15:45:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Someone really should put up a site lauding the benefits of the consumption of human flesh.
Any volunteers?
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-06-18 15:37:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-06-18 15:23:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/117245 Shameless.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-06-18 15:23:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-06-18 15:20:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ha.
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-06-18 15:14:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This, from http://www.acu-cell.com/zomb.html
AHAHAHHAHAHA
...et al
this is brilliant.
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-06-18 15:13:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am lauded.
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-06-18 15:12:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AHEM.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/116448
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-06-18 15:11:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Could have been alot better.