Three years and a hot chick (1498 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.03 on 50 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by JulsInsane (View user info) at 2008-03-12 11:47:57 EDT
I am going to type this straight into the Message box because I am a rebel like that.
Ever go to a friend or significant other's family gathering, and there is always talk of this fabulous food that "insert family member" makes that is better than any food ever tasted by man?
Is it just me or does it usually taste like ass?
At what age does it suddenly become cool to display your wine in your apartment? I wish I could lie and say I don't have 6 various bottles on a spinny caddy thing in my dining area.
I didn't notice that downward slide from casual fun with a pint and friends into this cesspool of wine and cheese parties with pretentious fucks who talk about what school they attended. Why did none of you warn me?
Uggs are the ugliest shoe ever created, even worse are the cardy kind with the black buttons, but fuck me if they aren't the most comfortable shoes ever made. I hate myself for owning a pair.
One man's kink is another man's foreplay... when did it become weird to want to use a pair of handcuffs? when did men become uptight?
Why can't I find a comfortable bra?
Three years here and this is the enlightenment ubersite has afforded me.
Now onward and upward... the hot chick!
User Reviews
Submitted by JustAnotherStudent (user info) at 2008-03-15 15:28:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My boyfriend's mom makes mole, and he swears up and down that it is the most wonderful tasting food. Last time I tried to eat it, I threw up. Tastes like the way dog shit smells.
I don't display any of my alcohol- I keep it in the closet until I'm ready to drink it. I drink wine, but it's the cheap stuff- not even worth displaying.
I'm going to be hosting a wine and cheese party in a few weeks with a close circle of friends- it's a late 21st b-day celebration. And we'll probably break down to vodka and rum before 10:00.
Fuck uggs.
I LOVE stuff like using handcuffs. I've been trying for months to get my boyfriend to play with me, but he's something of a prude. Supposedly this weekend we're going to pull out some silk scarves- I think he's just bluffing.
He claims he's uptight because of Mexican culture. However, I know tons of Mexicans, male and female, who could outkink me in a second.
I've given up on having a comfy bra. I was measured and all that, and so i was able to start wearing the correct size which reduced the discomfort... but they will never be truly comfortable. Not even Victoria's Secret.
I'm too fat to go braless. I already have jiggly arms and fat rolls on my stomach, why add insult to injury?
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2008-03-13 13:14:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2008-03-12 18:28:37 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2
IPEX wireless bra by Victoria's Secret.
The best $40 you'll ever spend.
Don't put it in the wash, though..handwash. Or be lazy like me and wash it but hang it to dry.
Of course then you get what we had here last week, which is the way....my bra was ruined. Don't let your manly roommates just throw everything in the dryer.
My boobs are sad :(
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2008-03-13 10:35:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Dear NipGuards, I'd really like to thank you for saving my nipples. Before I discovered NipGuards, my nipples would often become erect and chafe against the jersey I wore for basketball. However, with NipGuards in place, I can play without fear of bleeding, cracking, scarring, or other painful side effects of my nipples. I showed my nipples to all of my teammates and they couldn't believe it! They all ordered some too. So thanks, NipGuards, from myself, my team, and most of all my nipples
Zach Stone Kentucky
===============================
I might buy the t-shirt just because it's funny and it's only 8 bucks.
http://us.st11.yimg.com/us.st.yimg.com/I/yhst-40659571713972_1994_1412266
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2008-03-13 04:31:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My tits are small enough that I don't need an underwire, or a bra in fact. I just stick on NipGuards and go about my day.
http://www.nipguards.com/index.html
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2008-03-13 01:23:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
hi.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-03-13 00:27:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Juls, have i ever told you that you're the greatest?
Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2008-03-12 23:24:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"Why did none of you warn me?"
misery loves company
Submitted by F_N_S (user info) at 2008-03-12 21:37:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
At what age does it suddenly become cool to display your wine in your apartment?
----------
when you can afford to have more alcohol than you can drink
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2008-03-12 21:28:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
IPEX wireless bra by Victoria's Secret.
The best $40 you'll ever spend.
Don't put it in the wash, though..handwash. Or be lazy like me and wash it but hang it to dry.
Of course then you get what we had here last week, which is the way....my bra was ruined. Don't let your manly roommates just throw everything in the dryer.
My boobs are sad :(
Submitted by TheBrad (user info) at 2008-03-12 19:01:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Handcuffs are a normal part of sex. that and roofies.
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-03-12 18:26:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm sorry, but I cannot stand...uggs, my God, it's just as annoying to type as it is to hear/say out loud/see/think about.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-03-12 17:27:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I aiways type straight into the box, I heard other ways you can do it but I am worried it would mess up the way i typed it out
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2008-03-12 16:52:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Seriously - no one? OK, I'll say it.
I'm sure we can help you with your bra situation. Just show us your boobs so we know what to look for.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-03-12 16:41:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i met that actress at a party a couple of years ago.
she was with this incredible douchebag, who i found out later was just her manager
she is fucking hot
i have tasted plenty of ass
i like a tongue in my ass during blow jobs and i like to pull my cock out of her pussy and put it in her mouth so i feel it's only fair to tongue her asshole in return.
i also like to switch my cock from her pussy to her ass and back but to prevent possible infection i sometimes make a pitstop at her mouth to clean up a bit in between before re-entering the vag, especially with australians, middle easterners and some south asians and of course it's always good to have a moist towel handy
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-03-12 16:17:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ugg boots are the most comfortable footwear you'll ever wear. I love my uggs.
Submitted by Ejryuu (user info) at 2008-03-12 15:50:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Chick wasn't that hot.
I don't think I'll ever aquire a taste for wine.
My girlfriend once tried to tie me up using dog collars but they were pretty poorly-made so I Hulked out of them when I decided that too much foreplay was torture.
I doubt it's the family member's food that's that good, but just that people are so used to having that that it becomes more of a comforting taste than a genuinely "good" taste.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-12 15:16:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I wish I had something more inspiring to say other than "congrats." On a different note I now determine that all anniversary, birthday, hits, mile marking posts will be a 0 instead of a -2 as I formerly prescribed. Anyone in the future can thank you.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-03-12 14:55:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this should be easy to heat, heat is low today.
i like wine but i don't display it i just drink it.
why wouldn't you mess with handcuffs? maybe he's new.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-03-12 14:53:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-03-12 14:34:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
that chick looks like a dude
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-03-12 14:25:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If a bra is not comfortable, don't wear one.
Why have I yet to see a picture of you following the advice I gave you?
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2008-03-12 14:08:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My family at functions seems to only make horrid Mexican or pork tenderlion, the only good thing is decent grub on Thanksgiving and some green jello stuff I like to call Green Stuff(I think taking out the Jello gives it pop)
Wine is for sycophants and nancies. I found I can hide a half gallon of liquor in my jacket and you'd never know(keep driving copper!).
Everyone likes cheese, even the lactose intolerant(the forbidden bacterially cured body fluid).
Cuffs are always useful, and if a man isn't willing to explore than he's not a man(fuck space weird sex is the true final frontier)!
Uggs are apparently required clothing to be always worn by sorority girls(Tri Delt...everyone has!)
Buy fancier bras(your boobs deserve better than JC Penny)
And I'm sorry Brick Tamland but while I care for lamp and want to be friends with lamp I do not love lamp.
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2008-03-12 13:55:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
1. I especially find this true with unfamiliar ethnic foods. It was strange to my palate to begin with, but then you add in the this-ain't-exactly-restaurant-quality nature of it and you just end up wanting to pinch your nose and make for the nearest exit.
2. It is never cool to display your wine. I have a wine rack, but it just sits in the corner as a convenient designated place to store wine or any other bottles of the same size. Capt. Morgan resides there as well.
3. Dinner parties are okay. It's an opportunity to have a more reserved get-together that doesn't have to involve binge-drinking and inviting the sluttiest girl at the office. However, wine and cheese parties absolutely sweat douchebag.
4. It amazes me that the hottest continent was the birthplace of the warmest non-polar-expedition footwear ever created. I don't give a fuck about the shoes either way, but I'm not exactly a pillar of the women's fashion critique community.
5. Handcuffs are a legitimate safety concern for anyone who's ever read Gerald's Game by Stephen King. Silk scarves feel better, have a few more uses, and if necessary can be escaped when one's significant other becomes prematurely indisposed.
6. A friend of mine had always had bra trouble until she went to some fancy shop in London. Apparently she'd just always been wearing the wrong size. She's naturally amazingly gifted and was properly measured at said London shop as a 32 ff. She then spent a small fortune on like 20 bras so she would be all stocked up for a while. As you can imagine, we call her Big-Boob-Stacie and I love her.
7. That chick is without a doubt, hotness.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-12 13:07:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
my plate is full as it is....i don't have time to sell its just that busy
i'm up to my neck in good GC's downtown and out on the island
Submitted by JulsInsane (user info) at 2008-03-12 13:05:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hey want to talk some good shop, I will start naming GC's
:-P
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-12 13:04:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hey man...you brought up names......i'm sticking my fingers in me ears right now
NANANANANANANANANANANANNANANANANCANTHEARYOUNANANANANANANANNANANA
Submitted by JulsInsane (user info) at 2008-03-12 13:00:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
let us keep uber as it should be a den of sexual miscreants and social rejects
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:58:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
uncomfortable
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:57:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by JulsInsane (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:55:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ohhh we are treading very close to real life now...
anyone want to talk about furries or kangaroos are the coolest animal
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:54:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hahah.....no Bernstein
Munk....that one hasn't come across my desk
Submitted by JulsInsane (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:52:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
REALLY??
Wouldn't be the Munk Residence would it?
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:48:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i need to stop talking about it...I've still got 12 Macassar Ebony doors to price for a Residence over on Sutton Place!
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:47:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i just ran back in there...its Softsoap Antibacterial but it doesn't have a labeled scent. its creamy like a container of spooge
omg maybe it is spooge
but it smells so good
but it's spooge
now what am i gonna do?
Submitted by JulsInsane (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:44:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what is the scent of the soap?
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:43:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
OMG THE HANDSOAP IN THE BATHROOM MAKES MY HANDS SMELL AWESOME!!!!!!!
Submitted by JulsInsane (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:42:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
rob totally and completely
just ask anyone who has met me
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:39:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Are all of your juls really insane?
Submitted by JulsInsane (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:37:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jeanneee I couldn't figure out why my bra was annoying the shit out of me the other day till I realized that at some point the underwire had worked its way out of the bra and I was walking around with only one wire. I was lopsided, it explains the more odd looks than usual.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:35:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I can't find a comfortable bra either. The one I have on right now is stabbing me in the ribs because the wire is popping out.
Submitted by JulsInsane (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:30:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
darko - I was close with that one, but alas someone had showed their boobs that day or something so I was lost in the boobage
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:27:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I find that hard to believe, it looks like your birthday one should have been on there
Submitted by JulsInsane (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:25:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have never had a post on most heated.
three years no heat.
cold as ice bitches yo.
Submitted by Rhymenocerous (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:13:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Yes. Their food usually does taste like shit.
It becomes cool to display wine in your apartment at the age of 25 or 26, assuming you drink wine. Go back to enjoying a pint with your friends. Beer is more fun than wine.
Uggs are hideous. Whats worse is girls who wear mini skirts and Uggs..or girls who wear Uggs in the rain and complain about how their feet are wet and cold.
My girlfriend wants to use handcuffs. I keep telling her to buy a pair but I think she thinks I'm joking. I wonder if she is joking...
I recently saw a show on TLC about the bra and how something like 80% of women are wearing the wrong size/type of bra. It was an hour long and very interesting.
Rhona Mitra is hot. She was the original model for Lara Croft..or one of the originals.
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:09:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I shall try to answer your questions in turn:
1) I have never tasted Ass so can't possibly comment I'm afraid.
2) I have wine, but displaying it is the wrong phrase. I keep it as I buy a nice bottle when I see one. 1 party though, or social gathering with friends and it is gone.
3) I went to a great School, private as only the British can truly do, I will be more than happy to tell you about it some time, over wine and 'Good' cheese.
4) Uggs are very ugly. What is it about them that suddenly turns women from people who can walk normally, Picking up their feet, into these weird trolls that have to scuff around everywhere? It drives me insane.
5) I have handcuff, real ones sadly, the inflatable lady complains that they hurt.
6) I find my training bra very comfortable so cant help there.
7) She is a hot chick, yep!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:05:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
SHOW ME YOUR HOLE AGAIN.
I forgot what it looks like.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-03-12 12:03:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
uggs are very ugly and even quite gay when worn by men.
my wife is a fan of the wireless VS bras...I dunno what they are called but I got them for Christmas and she's been back to get more of them.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-03-12 11:54:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
displaying wine is like diplaying your cock, only when its about to be used.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-03-12 11:53:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I make unbelievable lasagna. Its my signature dish.
I really want a nice wine-rack.
I like cheese, but don't feel the need to talk about it.
I couldn't care less what school anyone attended.
I wish they made Ugg's for men. They DO look comfy.
Handcuffs = instant boner.
I think you could've found a hotter girl.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2008-03-12 11:49:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It is never cool to display wine. Fuck that, just drink it.