It Is Time For You To Confess. NOW. (1023 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.6 on 37 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Stabkill (View user info) at 2008-02-28 13:52:36 EST
Look, I like peanut M&M's just as much as anyone that doesn't have a hypersensitive and potentially deadly allergy to peanuts. But who would actually buy a NASCAR jacket that looks like something that is even gaudy to Fifty Cent?
NASCAR jackets I have seen worn by only two kinds of people: Rednecks and hip-hop wannabe rappers. Both of these groups can be summarily executed and thrown into a mass grave for all I care.
I know there is somebody here that has one. Admit it now. I demand it from you.
I want you to explain your behavior if you have ever worn any of the following items or have bought into some stupid fashion trend:
Whites: Big-ass fucking bright-colored comb sticking out of your pack pocket
Blacks: Pick sticking out of your 'fro
Parachute pants, one leg of your pants scrunched up to your knee, a fucking pacifier in your mouth when you were a teenager, white makeup and black lipstick/eyeliner, sagging pants, pants so tight you'll never bear children, leopard print jeans, collared shirt with collars so long and sharp that they'd make JJ Evans say "DY-NO-MITE!", flung around glowing light sticks to trance music because you thought you were cool, wore a white T-shirt and black leather jacket, wore a black leather "duster" jacket with those dangling fringe things like you are the fucking lead singer for Dokken or something...
I can't even think of more insulting clothing options. I'll begin by admitting that I wear T-shirts that have retro-oriented graphics on them. But no fucking Nascar jacket.
User Reviews
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-02-29 10:32:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:40:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Um... Skrap. I thought you were a dude.
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I am a dude, just a dude with a ponytail. It's mostly light brown, but the newer it is the greyer it is for some reason.
See ya at Bike Week!
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2008-02-29 06:24:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-02-28 16:03:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
make fun of auto racing all you want, but it's damn fun to party with the racers. my family is pretty deep in racing. my dad has been on ESPN a lot. my sister worked for NASCAR for a little while and is trying to get another job with them in marketing. my family is the farthest thing from white trash or hillbillies. they just happen to like cars that go really fast. driving a car that can go 200 mph is quite a rush. everyone should try it once.
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My other half builds F1 cars. I don't think I have ever seen him watch a race. I think it's fun to watch the cars he's built go round, especially if something goes wrong with one and he starts to sweat a little. The contracters involved are crazy bastards, but awesomely good fun on a night out.
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2008-02-29 06:17:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'll admit, I have worn a white tee-shirt under a leather jacket. I was however on a motorbike, so it doesn't really matter what you wear under your jacket.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-29 05:09:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
People say my trousers are tight but that is only because I have a 30 inch waist in an era where 1 in 4 people are morbidly obese and much of the remainder are fat knackers.
ALSO; FAT PEOPLE BUY A BELT! I DO NOT WANT TO SEE YOUR UNDERPANTS!
Seriously; it is like the big top collapsed on the elephants and all the children in the audience are crying.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-29 05:09:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
People say my trousers are tight but that is only because I have a 30 inch waist in an era where 1 in 4 people are morbidly obese and much of the remainder are fat knackers.
ALSO; FAT PEOPLE BUY A BELT! I DO NOT WANT TO SEE YOUR UNDERPANTS!
Seriously; it is like the big top collapsed on the elephants and all the children in the audience are crying.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-29 05:09:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
People say my trousers are tight but that is only because I have a 30 inch waist in an era where 1 in 4 people are morbidly obese and much of the remainder are fat knackers.
ALSO; FAT PEOPLE BUY A BELT! I DO NOT WANT TO SEE YOUR UNDERPANTS!
Seriously; it is like the big top collapsed on the elephants and all the children in the audience are crying.
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2008-02-29 02:54:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Rednecks and hip-hop wannabe rappers.
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honestly, i would have pegged you for one of those.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-02-29 00:10:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No bad clothes or accessories for me, as my mom still buys my clothes and she has exquisite taste, but I got into a car accident when Dokken was playing on the radio once. Also, I saw Dokken in concert. That's about all the Dokken stories I have to share.
You're welcome.
Submitted by Falafel (user info) at 2008-02-28 20:03:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm only guilty of one of those: collared shirt with collars so long and sharp that they'd make JJ Evans say "DY-NO-MITE!"
I'm a girl though, so I don't think that's quite as gay as on a guy. Also, I'm young, therefore my fashion sense is infallible... until someone 20 years later deems it to be fucking retarded.
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2008-02-28 19:19:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I used to wear parachute pants through two years of high school.
I'd wake up 5 minutes before school started, throw those on, and sleep all day in school. They were almost like pajamas. Perfect for sleeping in a chair or desk. Highly recommended.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-02-28 16:53:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
exactly
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2008-02-28 16:09:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-02-28 16:03:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
make fun of auto racing all you want, but it's damn fun to party with the racers. my family is pretty deep in racing. my dad has been on ESPN a lot. my sister worked for NASCAR for a little while and is trying to get another job with them in marketing. my family is the farthest thing from white trash or hillbillies. they just happen to like cars that go really fast. driving a car that can go 200 mph is quite a rush. everyone should try it once.
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so what you are saying is that you are a sister fucker?
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-02-28 16:05:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2008-02-28 16:01:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-02-28 14:30:01 CST (#)
Ranking: 0
Also, NASCAR is the most popular spectator sport (insofar as it is a sport, which is definitely arguable) in the U.S. The big races draw crowds of 350,000 or more.
Not that I'm condoning it. I think it's boring as shit. I just don't think it's fair to assume that only sister-fuckers enjoy watching it.
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I don't assume they are all sister-fuckers. But if you wear a gaudy bright-colored NASCAR jacket, the percentage of this being true just went up a whole lot.
______________________
touche'
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-02-28 16:03:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
make fun of auto racing all you want, but it's damn fun to party with the racers. my family is pretty deep in racing. my dad has been on ESPN a lot. my sister worked for NASCAR for a little while and is trying to get another job with them in marketing. my family is the farthest thing from white trash or hillbillies. they just happen to like cars that go really fast. driving a car that can go 200 mph is quite a rush. everyone should try it once.
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2008-02-28 16:01:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-02-28 14:30:01 CST (#)
Ranking: 0
Also, NASCAR is the most popular spectator sport (insofar as it is a sport, which is definitely arguable) in the U.S. The big races draw crowds of 350,000 or more.
Not that I'm condoning it. I think it's boring as shit. I just don't think it's fair to assume that only sister-fuckers enjoy watching it.
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I don't assume they are all sister-fuckers. But if you wear a gaudy bright-colored NASCAR jacket, the percentage of this being true just went up a whole lot.
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:58:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I like baggy pants. Not the kind that hang down below your ass, but the ones that give your boys room to swing.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:40:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Um... Skrap. I thought you were a dude.
Submitted by Wompom (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:40:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
People that flip because someone else looks stupid crack me up.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:37:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I only got clothes from Goodwill unless it was Christmas, so all my fashion faux-pas were 5 years behind everyone else's, and technically weren't mine, as my choices were limited to what other people discarded/grew out of.
Technicality FTW.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:35:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:19:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I wore neon slouch socks, Keds, acid-washed Guess miniskirts, hair scrunchies, and New Kids On the Block t-shits in the 80's, when it was still acceptable to do things like that.
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Although I've never knowingly worn a t-shit or any of the rest of that stuff, I do have a black scrunchy in my ponytail right now.
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:34:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I used to wear baggy pants.
Now I wear... not baggy pants.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:31:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
One of the appeals is "sitting in skyboxes drinking free booze and eating free food"...at least for me.
Another part of it's appeal is drunk broads lifting their shirts and showing me their cans.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:30:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Also, NASCAR is the most popular spectator sport (insofar as it is a sport, which is definitely arguable) in the U.S. The big races draw crowds of 350,000 or more.
Not that I'm condoning it. I think it's boring as shit. I just don't think it's fair to assume that only sister-fuckers enjoy watching it.
Submitted by 8bithero (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:27:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
To quote Mitch Hedberg on NASCAR; "Boy, you really like Tide."
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:19:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I wore neon slouch socks, Keds, acid-washed Guess miniskirts, hair scrunchies, and New Kids On the Block t-shits in the 80's, when it was still acceptable to do things like that.
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2008-02-28 15:16:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2008-02-28 13:55:19 CST (#)
Ranking: 2
In the NYC area, I've only seen the wannabe rapper type wear these atrocities.
From stuff I've read in passing, NASCAR seems EXTREMELY popular throughout the rest of the country, despite zero support around these parts. What is the appeal?
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I'm guessing that if someone can answer that question they are also banging their own sister.
Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2008-02-28 14:55:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
In the NYC area, I've only seen the wannabe rapper type wear these atrocities.
From stuff I've read in passing, NASCAR seems EXTREMELY popular throughout the rest of the country, despite zero support around these parts. What is the appeal?
Submitted by Rhymenocerous (user info) at 2008-02-28 14:40:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I used to have a serious rat tail when I was in elementary school. I did it to freak out all the old ladies at church. When I got kicked out of Sunday School for fucking around too much, my mom made me cut it and we stopped going to church shortly after.
I never really wore stupid clothing. I think the stupidest thing I wore was overalls with only one strap connected...for like a week. I also wore a backwards hat, tilted slightly to the side, but stopped because I thought it was gay. That was in 1992.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-02-28 14:37:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm going to see the NASCAR boys drive in circles this Sunday in Vegas. M & MMMMMMM, good.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2008-02-28 14:23:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I wore white make-up, black lipstick in college.....
I was in a play, and I only wore it on stage.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-28 14:23:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
as long as you don't dress like this: http://www.ubersite.com/m/114671
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2008-02-28 14:14:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
JORTS!
Submitted by Hookhand (user info) at 2008-02-28 14:11:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I had really awful awful hair in 8th grade. I wanted it a bit longer (like long enough to tuck behind my ear) which would have looked ok, but my hair was WAY too thick so ended up looking ridiculous. I wear jeans and a t-shirt when I'm not wearing 1,500 dollar vested suits, so no stupid fashion blunders for me.
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2008-02-28 14:01:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Ok, ill admit. I used to wear a DC bigstar with three studs in it.
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2008-02-28 14:00:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Das muh jaket fool.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-28 13:59:36 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
this is the same post as McCallum's without the funny pictures
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-02-28 13:55:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
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