You think you're smart but I've seen you naked + Camwhore (1378 hits)
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Submitted by matnotharry (View user info) at 2008-02-14 07:03:46 EST
Whilst messing around on Google in a shameless effort to put off writing this article I decided to take an IQ test to see if I could join the 'High Intelligence Society' one particular website boasted. I managed a respectable 123 but was slightly put out when I saw the cut off mark for joining the club was 124 - all the same I was happy with my score and rewarded myself with twelve games of Solitaire. Allusions of intellectual superiority were tested around lunchtime however when I found myself researching instructions for baking a potato and subsequently phoning to mum to answer a couple of questions. Shadows of doubt were further cast when I discovered that, in a moment Score-induced drunken genius, I had shoved a pizza box and a half eaten cheesecake in a Tesco bag and left it dangling out the window, presumably to keep them cold without making a trip to the fridge. I have no idea.
With this in mind you might be surprised to hear that our collective general intelligence has increased from generation to generation at a rate of 3 points per decade since 1950. This is known as the Flynn Effect and was first studied by James Flynn, a man who has spent nearly 30 years following the trends in global intelligence. During this time he grew a wholesome but tidy beard and put forward a number of ideas on the correlations between intelligence and race, politics and social background. The most infamous being a proposal to put a contraceptive in the water supply of towns so that an antidote would have to be taken in order to conceive. This was a response to statistics showing less educated women tend to bear more children, which tends to lower the average intelligence of a population (just as if only small people were to copulate the average height would fall). Flynn's response to his idea being described as 'totally repugnant' was that that he is simply 'too old to worry about offending people'.
The Flynn Effect stemmed from Flynn's finding that a the average IQ of Dutch conscripts had jumped 20 points in only thirty years. He also found hundred years ago the average IQ was 70, which is the cut off point for mental retardation in a modern scale with an average of 100. There is no definitive explanation for this steady increase though for many years genetics was seen to be an obvious answer - clever parents tend to have clever children, fraternal twins tend to be of similar intelligence and identical twins even more so. Improved nutrition, better standards of education, smaller families and even heterosis (selective breeding) have also been put forward.
Social factors are not often cited as having a direct effect on IQ and in many discussions on intelligence an analogy of twins separated at birth only to perform equally well in IQ tests in their middle years is often cited - but I'm not going to do that here. However it has been shown that first born children can be as much as 2.3 IQ points higher than their younger siblings and have 13% higher chance of being of high intelligence than the second born child. This has been attributed to first born offspring acting as surrogate parents in later years and having more one-on-one parental interactions the early ones. Until a few years ago I would have whole heartedly agreed with this (would you guess I am the oldest sibling in my family?) however my younger sister is now not far off 12 now and is significantly more mature and intelligent for her age than both me and my two teenage brothers. Combined. I have a sneaking suspicion she knows it too.
It is important to realise here that IQ is just one of several measures of intelligence - they are not the same thing. An IQ test is usually designed to assess the one's short term memory, vocabulary, mental arithmetic and ability to spot abstract patterns - it's not necessarily an all encompassing indication of brainpower. Despite a low IQ our ancestors from 1900 would not be as dim as you might think; instead their intelligence would be rooted more in the real world. What sets us apart is our capability to be more calculative in the way we apply knowledge and problem solve but we are no better at storing general information, amassing vocabulary or baking potatoes.
This explains why we do not intellectually tower over our parents or grandparents and perhaps why nearly 4 million Americans have claimed to have been abducted by aliens at some point in their lives. Our advancing intellects explain why our television programs like 24 have such complex storylines when a generation ago you could turn on Starsky and Hutch and simultaneously turn off your brain. The need for cranial stimulation is also seen in the rise of middle aged people purchasing 'Brain Games' for various hand-held electronics in order to offset encroaching premature senile dementia. Though it remains unclear just how effective these games are several Brain Research groups in Australia have vouched for their effectiveness at keeping the brain active.
Chances are of course you are reading this as a university student, perhaps one waiting for a complex and intelligent sounding lecture, and are thus hopefully fairly bright as it is. Now that I've warmed your ego slightly I'd like you to try your hand at the aforementioned IQ test - found at www.highiqsociety.org/iq_tests/ (you want the eCMA one). It doesn't take long and I'd be genuinely interested on a non-competitive level on how well you do (though obviously less so if you beat 123).
Here's a camwhore. Try spot the hidden danger - hint: it's an STD
User Reviews
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-15 09:03:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
When did I say that berty? Not as good as my telling Rad to go boil his baby. Legendary
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-04-15 08:33:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-14 08:17:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Uber is full of massive cocks.
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lol
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-15 06:51:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...you wanna do something sometime?
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What like meet for a drink or a post? Hahaha.
Sure. Yes.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-15 06:50:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2008-04-15 10:50:51 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
...I do. But I'm at home and it's my brothers, and it's just a little one... That's not really an excuse is it? I dont have the table poster at my uni place though; I dont even have that naff mixology one
Either manganese because it makes a really cool purple solution with potassium in water or Gallium, because it'll melt in your hand. Ooh, ooh or several of the transition metals as they make uber cool metal complexes: http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=34403673&id=61309370
Shit I put way too much thought into that
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You are such a nerd.
Your youth makes me envious by the way. You all look like the Kooks or something.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-13 18:36:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I keep missing you! I demand you be on here asap and I jolly well hope you have a post with pictures of India ready. If your travelling companion was a really hot chick (or bloke, I don't know) then be sure to chop them out. I'd only get terribly jealous :)
Submitted by DreamWeaver (user info) at 2008-04-11 13:16:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Are you going to do a travel post?
I hope you had a good time. If you thought that was racy, have a quick peek at some of these
http://www.ubersite.com/u/orphelia/l/uberotica2008
I knew you were too pure for my contest, thats why I tried to do it while you were away!
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-04-10 15:19:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Internet IQ tests are foolish and useless. As someone said below, go to a qualified shrink and take a real test. You will typically score 20-25% lower at the shrink than online.
My shrink told me I was the first negative IQ he had ever seen. Asshole.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-04-10 14:52:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
YAY! YOU'RE BACK!! :)
Submitted by sideshow (user info) at 2008-02-20 20:01:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I got 138 on that test, and they invited me to their stupid society. Damn them! That is lower than I typically score on IQ tests, but hey, I rushed it and instead of thinking through all the answers, I guessed on a lot of those "find which one comes next in the pattern" questions.
I believe that people are getting dumber, as a whole.
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2008-02-14 19:59:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I saw a documentary on the world IQ getting higher over the last century, all it proves is that we are better at taking certain tests.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-14 19:49:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sorry Shlongy - I was so busy eating that gimp and dealing with the aftermath of picking bits of neoprene between my many rows of teeth that I forgot to include you.
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ChaosJester?
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2008-02-14 19:46:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry Shlongy - I was so busy eating that gimp and dealing with the aftermath of picking bits of neoprene between my many rows of teeth that I forgot to include you.
But yea. </comment>
Submitted by MyTeeOne (user info) at 2008-02-14 18:53:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I know people in that society and I have a hard time believing they're as smart as they say.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-02-14 17:27:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
WHAT??? NO "COMMENT" FOR SHLONGY???
THAT'S BLASPHEMY. Or something.
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-02-14 16:59:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
OMG! You have crabs!
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2008-02-14 16:43:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Forensic - I cant remember what caused it but I had a hunch it wasnt an average crappy IQ test. Though it well may be a bogus one
Sicosemen - I write these for the Science section of a student paper and have to find a balance, equilibrium if you will, between making it science based and making it, well, interesting. I guess I failed here : )
Corn - Unlucky mate - you're still above average though!
Blazing Bull - what the hell?!
Submitted by Quint (user info) at 2008-02-14 12:23:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Method's Mom once did an online IQ test and her result was "Whore"
Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2008-02-14 12:19:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Incidentally, I got 123. Just as well, since I had to guess at all those patterns. I just don't see it. Ever.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-02-14 11:57:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Are you about to bite that loser on the boogie board? NICE.
Windsurfers SHOULD get eaten.
Submitted by BlazinBull (user info) at 2008-02-14 11:44:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Very interesting. Is that a big-ass pony tail you have there?
Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2008-02-14 11:38:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Flynn's response to his idea being described as 'totally repugnant' was that that he is simply 'too old to worry about offending people'. "
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That was worth +2. The idea being referred to doesn't sound too bad, actually. Ever walked White Plains Road in the Bronx? At night? How about Harlem?
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2008-02-14 11:11:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
good stuff.
I've been declared a genius on those sites too. I think everyone gets in... nerds and geeks get lonely you know - and if you think you're one of them, you might breed with them :)
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-02-14 11:02:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I took a few online tests, ranged from 139-148... Then I was administered an IQ test by an actual shrink and got 115.
I was disappointed.
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2008-02-14 10:28:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm pretty sure that according to those tests 50% of the population is in the top 5%. Last time I did one of those it said I was a genius. Bullshit.
Submitted by recall (user info) at 2008-02-14 09:24:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The great white clap. Bonus!
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2008-02-14 08:46:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have always been a fan of putting stuff in water so people couldn't have kids.
But IQ tests aren't the best measure of intellegence, I am sure there are plenty of smart crackheads out there.
If it were possible I would go for a few criteria before having kids, a job and proven ability to manage credit would be high up there.
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2008-02-14 08:44:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
which post had the picture from Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom yesterday? the pic was of the dude holding up the burning, still-beating heart with an "I" and a "U" so it said i <3 u?? huh pleeeease?
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-14 08:17:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
While informative, this was incredibly boring.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-14 08:17:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Uber is full of massive cocks.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-02-14 08:05:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I also have a huge penis.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-14 08:00:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Urgh, way to start a 'my penis is bigger than yours' contest. But with brains.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-14 07:55:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
122, you fucker.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-02-14 07:53:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
YOUR IQ SCORE IS:
134
Your score places you in the top five percent of the population. This qualifies you for membership in the International High IQ Society.
Woohoo! (I usually get around 134-136 in these online tests)
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-02-14 07:47:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
With this in mind you might be surprised to hear that our collective general intelligence has increased from generation to generation at a rate of 3 points per decade since 1950. This is known as the Flynn Effect and was first studied by James Flynn, a man who has spent nearly 30 years following the trends in global intelligence. During this time he grew a wholesome but tidy beard and put forward a number of ideas on the correlations between intelligence and race, politics and social background. The most infamous being a proposal to put a contraceptive in the water supply of towns so that an antidote would have to be taken in order to conceive. This was a response to statistics showing less educated women tend to bear more children, which tends to lower the average intelligence of a population (just as if only small people were to copulate the average height would fall). Flynn's response to his idea being described as 'totally repugnant' was that that he is simply 'too old to worry about offending people'.
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God bless him! I repeated the gist of this in one of my psych classes once when we were discussing intelligence. I still remember the looks of horror on my professor and classmate's faces. That upset me. Fuck political correctness, I had a point.
Anyway, I regard intelligence testing as highly dubious. IQ tests shouldn't be used as a measure of intelligence. IQ tests really aren't reliable enough to be used for that. Rather, they are useful to screen for retardation.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-02-14 07:17:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"The most infamous being a proposal to put a contraceptive in the water supply of towns so that an antidote would have to be taken in order to conceive. This was a response to statistics showing less educated women tend to bear more children, which tends to lower the average intelligence of a population (just as if only small people were to copulate the average height would fall). Flynn's response to his idea being described as 'totally repugnant' was that that he is simply 'too old to worry about offending people'."
I liked this. Brilliant idea. But its not ONLY dumb girls that pregnant...is it?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-14 07:12:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BTW, I was very surprised, no, I was SHOCKED to hear that our collective general intelligence has increased from generation to generation at a rate of 3 points per decade since 1950.
*Shocked*
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-02-14 07:09:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm...............
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-14 07:08:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
WTFINRAT! Is the hidden danger crosswinds?