How do I get a Girl to Have Sex With Me? (1417 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.08 on 54 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by chipolatte (View user info) at 2008-02-07 03:55:15 EST
Go to
wiki.answers.com and ask that question
I laughed a little.
I pooped a little too.
cause
effect
User Reviews
Submitted by Maddog (user info) at 2008-02-09 15:10:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ask your mother nicely.
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2008-02-08 06:01:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BWAAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2008-02-07 20:23:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
super-glue a thousand dollar bill on your dick?
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2008-02-07 18:36:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
In your case, Rhohypnol.
Submitted by Linus (user info) at 2008-02-07 15:07:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 Front page.
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2008-02-07 14:04:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-07 13:06:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Begin by getting the fuck off the internet, followed by losing 50 lbs., moving out of your mother's basement, getting a job that requires more than a GED, developing some social skills, and finally finding someone with very low standards.
I'd recommend visiting "Lowered Expectations"
---
i call bullshit on that
you just gotta not give a fuck
works for me
Submitted by Wompom (user info) at 2008-02-07 13:58:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-02-07 13:06:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Begin by getting the fuck off the internet, followed by losing 50 lbs., moving out of your mother's basement, getting a job that requires more than a GED, developing some social skills, and finally finding someone with very low standards.
I'd recommend visiting "Lowered Expectations"
Or you could just kill yourself.
Submitted by Linus (user info) at 2008-02-07 12:44:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by GrinMan (user info) at 2008-02-07 12:39:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Was quite the knee slapper my dear lad.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2008-02-07 12:08:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for Berty and iddq's take on D_R... made me LOL
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-02-07 11:29:03 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Now ask it how you slit your throat.
Submitted by EkO (user info) at 2008-02-07 10:13:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Not so much.
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-02-07 10:11:37 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Have another one just because this is a crappy post and you know it.
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-02-07 10:11:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Why DOESN'T this have a minus rating?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-02-07 07:59:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
In your case, begging, followed by a cash payoff.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-02-07 07:34:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Sadly, this is probably your best post.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-02-07 07:25:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2008-02-07 07:20:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
fucking post a link next time
---
Says Mr. bi-polar
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2008-02-07 07:20:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
fucking post a link next time
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2008-02-07 07:16:04 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
*sighs* I thought this was going to be a genuine post.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-02-07 07:10:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
My first answer to that title was...tequila, lots and lots of tequila.
And even though it was a 'joke' post. I still recommend the tequila.
That and actually TALK to a girl....either or.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-07 06:48:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
cash rules everything around me
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-07 06:48:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
and UNless,
YOU'RE
beRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTY!!!!
ROCK!!
dugga dugga dugga dugga, dugga dugga dugga..
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-07 06:46:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
gay is cool btw,
unless you're in it.
shrugs.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-07 06:44:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-07 06:37:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not gay. I'm just hairy and quiet.
-----------------
annnnnnnnnnDDDDDDDDDD THAT,
MEANS,
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY roaaaaaGGGHHHHHHH!!!
BERTY AND SAMUEL - THEY GOT GAY
BERTY AND SAMWISE GOT REAL GAY
BERTY CHEATED SOMEONE
ANNNNNNNNNNNNNND GOT GAY
AND,
THAT,
WAS,
gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!
ROaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwg ROCK!!!
DUGGA dugga dugga, dugga dugga dugga
and so on and so forth.
anyway i'm out.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-07 06:37:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Hilarious BTW.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-07 06:37:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not gay. I'm just hairy and quiet.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-07 06:28:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by chipolatte (user info) at 2008-02-07 06:22:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
red group cut the chatter we're going in
-------------
chuckle. goodnight fucksticks.
Submitted by chipolatte (user info) at 2008-02-07 06:22:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
red group cut the chatter we're going in
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-07 06:13:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:48:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
d-r is too busy to review, hes got a casino to rob, and that takes a lot of planning.
though i must say you can do better than julia roberts, shes so mannish. wait...
---------------------
okay myskillzarelackingsoihaxxoreddoom, the other day I was catching the bus, that's right - the bus, and on my <insert no-name brand mp3 player here so i don't sound like a sheep>, on my nan...oh fuck it, I heard "IDDQD - HE FUCKS...people?, IDDQD, HE FUCKS PEOPLE, DUGGA DUGGA DUGGA DUGGA DUG-AH DAH, IDDQ DEE, HE FUCKS PEOPLE OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH yeaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH."
cue band making hair shaking hair shaking
"Andddddddddddddddddddddddddd THOSE PEOPLE HE FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKS - AREN'T REAL PEOPLE
<stage right satanic ronnie james dio voice>, BUT, THEY'RE, YOUR. moooooooooooMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*MOTHERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH SHE'S NOT YOUR MOTHERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH, SHE'S YOUR BROTHER,
aNNNNNNnnnnnnnnD aaaaaaaaaarrrRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AND THAT MEANS *BERTY*
yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, AND THAT!!!MAKES......THEMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM GAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *ROCK*!!!!
dugga dugga dugga, dugga dugga dugga, dugga dugga dugga dugga dugga dugga
and
THEY
GOT
GAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.
as I alighted the bus I gave my no name mp3 player to the driver and said "you keep it, it's only rock and roll and you'll like it. fag."
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:59:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
haha
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:56:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I just realised Chipolatte is a dude.
I REMEMBERED THAT SPECKIALK IS HAWT THOUGH! I DON'T NEED TO BE INSTITUTIONALISED YET!!
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:48:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
FUCK I KILL ME
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:48:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
d-r is too busy to review, hes got a casino to rob, and that takes a lot of planning.
though i must say you can do better than julia roberts, shes so mannish. wait...
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:40:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'M NOT REVIEWING ANYMORE
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:39:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:34:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You're right DR. This is exactly like the time my friends were talking about Christina Aquilera and I thought she was someone I'd went to school with who'd just gone into the toilets.
I mean heck, I only know who you are 'cause of all those adverts I saw in the 90's for ER.
--------------------
blinks
okay well go and get stuffed fabio, I only remember you from all those faggity anne books you were on the cover of that I...my mum read.
EVERYBODY CAN JUST GO AND GET STUFFED
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:36:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
you shut up cheaty boy, this is between goldilocks and I. go hack a wall and suprise some barons of hell or something.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:34:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You're right DR. This is exactly like the time my friends were talking about Christina Aquilera and I thought she was someone I'd went to school with who'd just gone into the toilets.
I mean heck, I only know who you are 'cause of all those adverts I saw in the 90's for ER.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:34:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
fuck i kill me
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:27:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
d_r doesnt understand this question because it says 'girl'
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:20:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Dear berty, remember that time you thought pantsarestupid was munkeypants? well this is just like then - but different somehow. if you were to equate it with chomsky and henry rollins? you'd get pretty much the same.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:11:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Chiploatte is Canadian? I should have known really, they all are.
You're right though, and I forget that Redskies has the body of a 14 year old so I suppose it will be alright in the end. Just as long as she doesn't touch his mole.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:06:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
berty she's like 14 or something. when in rome and all - canada's not fucking arranged marriage pakistan. or birmingham. assimilate you cunt, or mI5 will assimilate your arse with the tower of london.
that still happens right?
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:04:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-07 04:58:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
y halo thar chipolatte. use money. you have to pick your mark and have some money. failing that have sex with redskies and close your eyes really hard and tight. think about something nice, like leicester cheese and tomato on toast with lots of cracked pepper, but do NOT open yours eyes - or you, will, not like it.
------------------------------
Redskies isn't allowed to have sex with Chipolatte because he is too old. Chipolatte is like narnia in that respect.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-07 05:00:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Is it safe to put your shower hose is your anus and turn it on?
-------------------
It's interesting that you mention that.
I recall about, oh, 6 months ago now reading a porn star interview in Bizarre magazine. The lady said that she was most fasticious with her anal cleanliness, particularly as her party piece was putting all manner of large objects up her bottom.
She recalled a day she was on a shoot with some mexican bird and her job was to wear one of those elephant masks that they have with that mad childrens game, the one where they have to throw hoops over the noses? Anyway, she had to wear one of those and poke the nose into the mexican ladies bottom whilst some anonymous dude porked her. The mexican lady was MOST embarrased because flecks of fecal matter ended up all over the mask.
The porn star being interviewed said that to get around this problem she would insert the entire showerhead up her bottom everymorning to ensure her rectal cleanliness.
So there you have it, SpecialK. It's a perfectly legitimate activity for hot birds such as yourself.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2008-02-07 04:58:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
y halo thar chipolatte. use money. you have to pick your mark and have some money. failing that have sex with redskies and close your eyes really hard and tight. think about something nice, like leicester cheese and tomato on toast with lots of cracked pepper, but do NOT open yours eyes - or you, will, not like it.
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2008-02-07 04:53:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I asked all of these questions:
What is a diaper fetish and how do you know if you have one?
Is it wrong to wear another person's underwear?
Is it safe to put your shower hose is your anus and turn it on?
I'm not ashamed.
Submitted by ICO (user info) at 2008-02-07 04:43:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
'What is the meaning of the France flag?'
Well, that's always the second question Í ask.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-07 04:40:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Oh God! Oh God, why? Why do I have to suffer this mindless bullshit?
Do I not go out of my way to live meekly, Lord? Do I not seek to raise up the weak to feel the soft caress of your light upon their cheek and lay down in green pastures with the lame so that they might feel your blessing?
I just feel so tired, Lord. So very tired. Forgive me my weakness but doubly forgive the twicefold weakness of this inane waterhead. He knows no better. He knows not how he sins.
Amen
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-02-07 04:27:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
peed a little
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2008-02-07 04:14:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
made me do my retard laugh
but my brain aint working right now
Submitted by chipolatte (user info) at 2008-02-07 04:06:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hahaha i just noticed this, scroll to the bottom of the page and read the alternate questions that should bring up the page
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-02-07 04:05:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha - but no poop.
Submitted by Registered_S_O (user info) at 2008-02-07 03:57:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I laughed a little as well